To Love Again
by Birdie num num
Summary: She's an Andalite nurse who lost her husband during the Yeerk War that ravaged the universe, and he's the famous former Animorph that lost the girl he loved most in the world. With nothing left but to carry on, they do, and they meet. BEING EDITED!
1. Tobias Still Alive

DISCLAIMER: No I didn't create these characters, I just wish they were real...not really... well...maybe... There's not going to be any sex in this chapter, so don't bother speed reading till you get to it. Sorry. Maybe...later... Oh, and duh, this takes place after the last book, in case you haven't guessed.  
  
Chapter 1 Tobias  
  
I sat by Ax's parents scoop, feeling another numb spell coming on.  
  
By numb I mean, well, no feeling. Stunned. I felt unconnected to everything around me. Was it really me sitting here, on this grass, in the warm suns? Was I really still here, still alive, breathing fresh air?  
  
I couldn't believe we'd actually survived the impact of The Rachel.  
  
Ax was free, everyone else had survived too.  
  
Jake had little damaged. Broken leg. And a huge cut on his face.  
  
Marco had broken his right arm at the upper arm, and a disconnected shoulder.  
  
I actually broke my neck, just near the collar bone.  
  
Of course, nothing we couldn't morph out of. Somehow, somehow, we survived.  
  
It had been a month ago. One month since we were brought to the Andalite home world to recuperate (and get awards and medals from the Andalite military, for rescuing Ax's butt. Marco and I were going to be declared Warriors.) Besides, Ax wanted me to meet my Andalite grandparents. They had more or less accepted me.  
  
Today, I was just sitting, waiting. You see, we have to wait for a ship back to Earth, since the Rachel was pretty much too messed up to fly without at least three months of repairs.  
  
So I was hanging out, chilling with Ax and my grands.  
  
It was one of my moments of numbness.  
  
It was mainly that feeling that I couldn't believe I was still alive. The feeling of being detached from everything around me. As if I wasn't really there. I couldn't believe I was really sitting here, staring at a sky that looked like perpetual afternoon. A strange place of two moons. The Andalite home world.  
  
I was in human form, wearing shorts and a t-shirt, barefoot, enjoying the feel of grass on my feet.  
  
Enjoying breathing. Being alive.  
  
I sighed. What a day! A light breeze was blowing and I inhaled, relaxing.  
  
What a day to enjoy with the people you loved. Or the girl you loved. I thought, and my heart felt that familiar ache.  
  
"Rach..." I whispered softly. "Oh...man..." I groaned, and drew my knees up. I put my arms across them and rested my head on my arms.  
  
I no longer felt the screaming, insane grief. Now my soul was just...tired...weary...no longer really caring if I lived on.  
  
I remember not really caring if I died after...after it happened.  
  
I still didn't really care as Jake's Rachel hurtled toward The One.  
  
I was glad that Ax was free now. He deserved freedom. He had fought so hard for it...lost so much.  
  
He came out of the scoop, interrupting my thoughts stretching and reaching. He sniffed, trying to wake up. He wiped sleep from his eyes.  
  
He looked over at me and eye smiled, the way Andalites do.  
  
"Hello Tobias."  
  
"Good morning Ax man."  
  
Ax smiled and looked over his family's land. "Yes. It is a good morning. A very good one."  
  
I had never been enslaved. I looked up at him, imagining how grateful, how thankful he must be  
  
to just be free again, and back on his own planet, with his own, biological people.  
  
"So." I said, getting up. "You wanna go see Jake and Marco?"  
  
"Yes. Why not?"  
  
I demorphed to hawk, then went andalite. Ax fed as we ran to Jake and Marco's scoops, about a mile away.  
  
*** Yay! My first chapter done! Well, hope yall liked it! Next one coming up soon! I promise!  
  
Now go review!!! Please!!! 


	2. Old Friends Just Kickin' back and Relaxi...

DISCLAIMER: Same as usual. I didn't write 'em. K.A. Applegate the Great did. Here's chappie 2. Sorry if the text is all jacked up, but I'm usin' Wordpad, so it would be. Love yas all! Enjoy!

Chapter 2 Tobias

"I'm very big in the gonads!" Marco was saying in an English posh accent to Jake, who was trying to eat some cereal and choking with laughter on it.

"Man, shut up and sit down!" Jake swigged some orange juice, then began to choke on it too, spitting it out, laughing, as Marco began to walk snootily around.

"My name...is Ballus-Maximus-Gooberrr, WAR PRINCE Ballus-Maximus-Gooberrr." Then "Sup Tobias! Sup Ax!"

"Goo-" Jake was laughing, redfaced, trying to say 'Good morning.' He attempted again. "Good-" He broke off, shaking with silent laughter again. He shook his head. Never mind.

I laughed too, and Marco sat down, grinning, satisfied with himself. Man, I hadn't seen Jake laugh so hard in such a long time.

Jake was doing okay now...he was, well, alive anyway.

He finally calmed down and shoved Marco out of his way. Marco grinned at us.

"So what are you natives doing here?"

I'm not a native. I said. I demorphed to hawk again.

We came to chill. Ax informed him.

"Chill awaaaay!" Marco said. Jake pushed by and threw his cereal out on the grass outside the scoop, by the side of the scoop.

"Marco was just about to take his PROZAC!" He turned and yelled into Marco's ear jokingly.

"I don't need it. Got my weed." Marco joked. "Got my WEED! YI!"

(Oh, yeah, there's got to be some weed around here somewhere.) I joked, smirking.

"The Andalites probably use it for 'medicinal purposes'." Marco retorted.

I laughed.

"I smoke my space weed to enlarge my GONADS!" Marco announced loudly. We busted out laughing. Even Ax.

Marco looked very pleased with himself now.

"Vell, I gotta go take a vinkle!" Marco announced in a Swedish accent. He got up and ran behind the scoop to the huge ship perched behind it.

The Rachel.

Well, she had to go somewhere while she needed repairs right?

Her whole front end had been smashed in the collision. Jake said it was a miracle she was still in one piece, even if she was huge.

We managed to get authorization from the Andalites to land her here, since all the space ports were full now.

Jake and Marco were using the Rachel to store food, clothes, and use the bathrooms on.

"Man." Jake said. "I need a shower."

(Gee. Thanks for that info, Fearless Leader.)

"Don't call me that Bird Boy." He joked. He went off into the Rachel too.

Ax sat comfortably outside the scoop. I rested too.

(So.) I said. (Have you chosen yet?)

Ax sighed. I was talking about the choice of either staying here, or coming back to Earth with me and what was left of the other animorphs. Ax still hadn't decided.

(I do not know Tobias.)

I left it at that. No use bothering with that now.

Santorelli came bounding out. Santorelli had gotten a broken leg too. And a busted shoulder.

He had since healed, of course.

"Ax! Tobias! Hey!"

(Sup Santorelli! I said.)

(Yes. What is up Santorelli? Good morning to you.) Ax said.

"Nothing much. Just woke up."

(How's Jeannie?)

"Better."

Jean had collided with the control panel during the fight. She had been in a coma for a few hours, but came out and demorphed of her injuries. She was still a little weak though. An Andalite nurse often came by to have a look at her. I hadn't met the doctors or nurses yet. They had a different nurse for each day, really.

Santorelli, Ax and I went into the ship. We walked to the area that was the dining hall. Jean sat at the table, eating Cheerios. Menderash was lazily reclining at some control panel seat. "Hey guys!" I said, now human. The sight of Lucky Charms made me oddly hungry for some. I sat down at the huge circular metal table Jake had created by welding a thick flat metal disk to a thick metal cylinder to the floor. I poured myself some cereal. I grinned at my companions. Jean's hair was a mess. Santorelli looked half asleep too, and sat, yawned, and wiped the sleep from his eyes. Ax resigned himself to resting in Andalite form on the floor.

Jake came in and sat down at the table. I munched away happily. The Lucky Charms were so...sweet. I hadn't tasted sweetness in my mouth in a long time. Except maybe for the predatory sweetness of blood, but I won't go into that.

Jean, having finished her breakfast, got up. "I'm going to go take a shower." She went down a passageway to her bathroom.

"So what's the plan, big Jake?" I asked.

Jake sighed. "I don't know. What exactly do you mean?"

I motioned to all of us. "What about everyone? Being here, I mean. How are we getting back to Earth?"

Jake sighed again. "Well. We got...what...Menderash!"

Menderash woke. "Yes Prince Jake?" He asked sleepily.

"What do we have left to do for the Rachel to be in flying condition?"

Menderash seemed to sigh. "More than I can count right now, Prince Jake. The main computer was damaged in the collision. I couldn't even begin to tell you if half the files can be recovered, or even if they exist anymore. If we do fly this ship again, it may have to be manually all the way; with someone steering at all times-"

"How long would we need to get the Rachel the way she used to be?"

Menderash seemed to almost laugh. "In prime condition! That would take...months. Three, maybe four months. Maybe even six."

"Ah hah!" Jake said.

Marco came dancing in a moment later. He had a shower cap on, and a towel around his waist.

"I just took a show-er! I just took a show-er!" He sang. He began to shimmy around the room.

"RRRRRRRRAI! YAI YAI!"

Ax stared, though he was beginning to shake with laughter. Jake rolled his eyes. I was trying not to choke on little milk covered rainbows and pots of gold, as I tried to hold back my laughter. Menderash opened one lazy eye, then turned his head to stare in annoyance mixed with fascination and amusement at the dancing, rubber duckie squeaking lunatic before him. Marco continued. Then, to our shock, he ripped off his towel! He threw the two rubber duckies he was holding, one hitting Jake in the back of the head, the other landing in my cereal bowl. "WAHOOO!" He screamed, running down the same passageway Jean had gone down only minutes earlier.

"Oh man!" Jake said standing. "Jean!"

I tried not to laugh. "She'll have finished her shower by now."

We listened. We could hear fading singing.

"I just took a show-er! I just took a- AAAAH!"

We sat, all snickering, including Menderash, who was now sitting up looking interestedly towards the passageway.

Silence.

Jean came in a minute later, looking refreshed and showered, her hair wet, but also looking very shocked and embarrassed.

"You okay Jean? We heard you scream." Jake said softly, looking a little worried about her.

"Oh! A hahahahaha!"

"What!" Jake asked, beginning to grin.

"Oh a la la! That wasn't me! That was Marco screaming!"

We all exploded into laughter.

"I swear that sounded like a woman screaming!" Jake said, laughing.

I pushed my cereal away. There was no way I could eat now. I was laughing way too hard.

We heard a tapping on the side of the open doorway of the ship. Jake looked up.

"Yes?"

"Oh! Hello!" Jean said, moving over to the doorway. "Come in please!" She turned to us. "It's my nurse!"

The andalite slowly stepped in. I thought it was an unusually built male until I saw the tail blade. The female andalite came in and her stalk eyes swiveled and looked around. She kept her main eyes on Jean.

(Hello. )She said, in open thought speak to all of us. (I am L'Ainishikaa- Cheshn Naksut-Namuni )She said, softly.

Hope you guys enjoyed that one! I'm working on Chappie 3 and almost finished, so don't freak out yet! Love yaz! Now please go review! Me likee da review!


	3. Ax gets a little therapy

DISCLAIMER: Yadda yadda yadda! Same disclaimer as usual. I didn't write 'em!

Thanks to you Wraithlord 42 for your reviews and encouragement! Thanks for the advice about Menderash, as it's been a while since I've read 54!

Thanks to everybody else who likes it! This is for yall!

"Whoa." Marco said, wiping his ears with a towel. He was back, and dressed now. (Thank God!) "That's a long name, even for an Andalite."

She blushed. (Yes, my parents are very proud of our family heritage.)

I even saw Menderash looking approvingly at her. Poor Menderash. It must be hard for him not to be able to relate to his people anymore. I could understand that.

We all tried not to snicker. He continued to look at her raptly, his tail twitching and curling a little.

She looked around at all of us. She rested her main eyes on Jake. She beamed. (You are Prince Jake.) She said with certainty.

"Yes." Jake said, obviously surprised she'd recognized him.

She seemed to laugh. (Don't think I can read minds or anything! I have seen images of you before.) She bowed her head quickly. (You are very appreciated among my people, you know.)

Jake grinned. "No, actually, I didn't realize that. I'd have thought they wouldn't have been so picky about me staying here."

L'Ainika seemed puzzled. She blinked several times, looking to Jean, as if to explain to her what Jake meant. Jean laughed.

"He is only fooling with you. He is grumpy you see. The government has been not easily persuaded to allow us to stay here while repairs are being made on Le Rachel. Come this way please."

(Yes, I wanted to talk to each of you about your medical situations privately.) L'Ainishikaa said.

"All of us?" I said, surprised. "We're all mostly fine."

( Well, you see, my superiors have expressed some...concerns...at your physical and mental states, as you have all been through so much.)

We all remained silent. Been through what? A suicide mission? Typical stuff for us, really.

I looked over at Ax to see what he thought and saw his open wide. He seemed to be listening to someone. Or rather, trying desperately not to. He shook his head, then placed his hands over his ears and began to scream in thoughtspeak.

He cut Jake off in mid sentence.

"What exactly do you mean by-"

(AAAAAAH! AAAAAAAAAH! AAAAH! AAAAH! AAAAAAAAH! NOOO! NOOOOOOO!)

"Aximili!" Jean cried out. She rushed to him.

"No!" Jake held Jean back.

"Oh help him please!" Jean said.

Marco ran to Ax. So did I. I demorphed to hawk. I spoke to him urgently in thoughtspeak. Menderash pinned Ax's arms to his sides, so he wouldn't hurt himself.

This had all happened before.

Ever since we had rescued him from the One, Ax would wig out sometimes. Just randomly wig out. For no reason.

(Ax!) I said. (Ax! Listen to me!)

He responded by shaking his head and screaming.

"Ax! Stop it!" Marco said.

Suddenly I rocked as Ax sent me a powerful image.

Of the One.

He was here. Or in Ax, anyway. Still holding onto Ax.

Why hadn't Ax told me before!

Had he told anyone!

I looked around, no one seemed to be unsurprised or shocked. We were used to Ax freaking out but we had just figured it to be aftermath. Just shock, maybe. Bad thoughts.

I should have known better.

You're in space Tobias! Space! I reprimanded myself. You should have known it wouldn't just be stupid war memories!

Deciding, I couldn't help as a hawk, I morphed to human, and placed my hand on Ax's shoulders. I shook him a little gently.

"Ax man? Ax, bud it's okay man. We're here. Calm down." I tried to look in his eyes, but he kept jerking them around and looking away from me.

Ax's screaming fit began to subside. I looked over to the nurse, L'Ainishikaa.

Her eyes were wide, all four of them focused on Ax. She had a look of knowing. As if she had just found precisely what she had been looking for.

I looked to her. She looked over and I caught her main eyes.

"What's wrong with him!" Jake cried, as Ax sat still, but for his torso rocking back and forth, Menderash still pinning his arms, Marco holding his tail back. Ax's eyes just stared off into space, eyes still wide.

"She knows." I said, motioning to the andalite nurse.

She looked surprised at me.

"Yes." I said again. "You do, don't you?"

They all looked to her. She looked down momentarily, as if thinking of telling us. Then she looked up.

"Yes." She said, looking us all evenly in the eyes.

"The One." I said softly. "He's still in Ax."


	4. Oh, it's just some multiple personality ...

DISCLAIMER: Don't own 'em, just love 'em! Peace out to my fave kiddie writer K.A. Applegate! W/out you, all the wonderful moments fantasizing about Ax, never would have happened...wait...  
  
Thank you Wraithlord42 for giving me reviews. I'd like to thank NOBODY ELSE, SINCE NONE OF YOU HAVE THE DECENCY TO REVIEW!!! Sorry for my crankiness. It gets very annoying when my first love story fanfic ever is out for nearly a week and nobody freaking reviews it!  
  
Well, enjoy!  
  
***  
  
L'Ainishikaa's POV  
  
"Yes." I said, and looked down at my hooves with my main eyes. They were obviously all shocked at this.  
  
My superiors had indeed sent me here to check on Aximili. They wanted to make sure the One was gone. Once I told them they would...  
  
Shocked, I realized I had no idea what they would do with Aximili.  
  
Deport him? Where?  
  
Incarcerate him? Where? What would be the point of that?  
  
Tobias the Warrior Human, Son of Elfangor the Andalite Prince, looked at me with worry in his eyes. The others had suspicious eyes.  
  
The human Marco stood, glaring at me. "What are you going to do-"  
  
What can you do to help him, please? Tobias cut him off. Marco glared at him. Tobias looked evenly back at him. He seemed to say something to him. The human remained silent, but turned away, angrily. Tobias turned to face me, seeming tired.  
  
I looked at him. Oh. Well. I could...well...I need to examine him further if you please. Privately.  
  
Alright. Tobias said. He got up and looked to Jake. Jake nodded. Tobias picked Prince Aximili up under the arms and helped him walk down the passageway. Jean directed me to the ship's medical wing.  
  
I stood in there, looking around, wondering exactly what to do. I was supposed to 'examine' Prince Aximili, but how exactly? I knew nothing of the One.  
  
I was beginning to think my superiors should have picked someone else for this, when Tobias tapped me gently on the shoulder.  
  
Hmm? I said, as I snapped out of my reverie.  
  
We got him on the table.  
  
Oh! I said, blushing, and made my way to the table Aximili was sitting on. I stood there.  
  
Now what was I supposed to do.  
  
Aximili had begun to come out of his trance and he looked at me almost expectantly. My stalk eyes looked behind me to see that Tobias had demorphed to his hawk nothlit form.  
  
And the others standing there all watching me expectantly.  
  
Ah... I said. I would like some privacy with the patient please.  
  
"Oh!" Prince Jake the human said. He blushed. "Come on guys! Let's leave uh...um...Nurse...  
  
Doctor. I corrected, feeling slightly annoyed. Ah, so I was a female, that automatically meant I was a nurse! Males!  
  
"Uh, yeah...Doctor...L..."  
  
L'Ainishikaa. I said, feeling even more annoyed. You may refer to me as Dr. L'Aini.  
  
Oh good. Tobias said.  
  
"Yeah, that saves alot of time." Marco the suspicious human commented.  
  
Prince Jake ushered everyone out. As Tobias fluttered to the floor and began to bird walk out of the room, I looked at him with my eye stalks.  
  
Ah, Warrior Tobias?  
  
He turned around. Yes Dr L'Aini?  
  
As I am not...entirely sure of the stability of Prince Aximili's mental state, I would like you to stay here, in case he needs to be calmed or...restrained. I said softly, speaking privately to him.  
  
Prince Aximili seemed to realize we were talking about him, but he merely looked off politely into space. Tobias fluttered up onto the table, and sat by him. I proceeded to examine Prince Aximili's pulse, eyes, ears, and every other possible thing to examine. But my searches proved to no avail. There was nothing to find.  
  
Of course! I thought to myself. This is ridiculous! If the One wanted anyone to find him, he would make himself obvious. I shuddered to think how.  
  
Suddenly, Prince Aximili grabbed my arm, causing me to jump. He stared intently into my eyes.  
  
Ax! The nothlit cried out.  
  
Well well... Prince Aximili said. You are...going to heal Aximili of me? He began to laugh. Andalites. So foolish. His grip tightened on my arm painfully as his laughter subsided. His tail blade began to rise.  
  
Ax! Tobias cried out again. Suddenly Prince Aximili's hand jerked away from my arm. He began to buck and jerk on the table. Warrior Tobias began to morph andalite. I backed away from Prince Aximili.  
  
Mad laughter came out of Prince Aximili, as his body jerked. No...from the One.  
  
Tobias, now andalite, advanced towards Prince Aximili, his tail waving warningly.  
  
Prince Aximili's tail shot out, hitting Tobias on the face, knocking him back. Prince Aximili's body continued to jerk. He was on his back now, screaming. Laughter still came from him. His hands clawed at his head.  
  
No. No! This was ridiculous! I refused to believe it!  
  
Furthermore, I refused to sit here and allow my patient to be controlled! What kind of doctor was I, shrinking away like that?  
  
I hesitated, then shook my head and snorted, and stomped straight up to him. My tail came out with complete accuracy.  
  
SWOCK! It hit the jerking prince on the side of the head. He stopped jerking.  
  
Slowly, all four of his eyes turned to stare at me.  
  
YOU! The One said, narrowing Prince Aximili's main eyes.  
  
YES! I said, ME! I struck him again.  
  
HOW DARE YOU?! He roared, outraged.  
  
I JUST DO! I roared back, swocking him again with my tail. I was simply not going to stand here and allow myself to be bullied! Especially by what was obviously some...some figment of Prince Aximili's imagination, or some split persona! Obviously, it could be frightened into submission.  
  
Good, I was in no mood to deal with silly split personalities. My superiors would be quite happy when they found out the so called "One" was just some mental disease!  
  
Tobias was looking up at me admiringly. His eyes were wide, astonished. Then they formed into a smile.  
  
Whoa. He said, while the One fumed.  
  
I smiled back. Thank you. I turned back to the One.  
  
You! I said. YOU. LEAVE. PRINCE. AXIMILI'S. BODY. NOW! I hit him for each word.  
  
He was obviously afraid of me, for some reason, this personality.  
  
He stared at me astonished. Then he blinked several times, looked off into space, then Prince Aximili's body dropped back on the table, his eyes closed.  
  
He sat up blinking, a moment later. He looked apologetically at me.  
  
Are you alright Doctor? He asked, softly.  
  
Yes. Are you alright Prince Aximili? I said, genuinely worried.  
  
Yes...I...I'm fine... He looked up at me, a new respect in his eyes. Thank you.  
  
I blushed. Oh. Well. You're welcome Prince Aximili.  
  
He smiled. You may call me Aximili.  
  
I bobbed my eye stalks.Very well Prince- I mean, Aximili.  
  
Aximili looked to Tobias. Are you alright Tobias?  
  
Tobias nodded. Yes. Yeah. I'm fine Ax. Don't worry about it man.  
  
Aximili nodded slowly. Then he got off the table. Tobias stood. I felt akward in their presence, suddenly.  
  
(I'm going to use these for thoughtspeak now, 'cuz that whole 8lt thing is reaaaaally starting to get on my NERVES!)  
  
(Thanks for your help.) Tobias said genuinely.  
  
I smiled. (It was nothing. Really. Just a little multiple personality disorder.) I laughed. I was speaking to him only. (Just keep an eye on Aximili; make sure he isn't alone too often, for two long. He looks like he could be a danger to himself. Maybe I could prescribe something to calm him down-)  
  
(Uh, Doc.) Tobias laughed a little. (I really don't think you understand. This is NOT multiple personality. This is real.)  
  
I smiled and shook my head. (Humans. You really are quite primitive) I was such a vain fool at the time! ( I assure you, Warrior Tobias, that there is no "One". There is only some fragment of a childhood problem your uncle has developed. Perhaps it was from isolation on planet Earth. I don't know. Now, if that is all, I will check up on the others, including yourself, and leave. I'm very busy!)  
  
Tobias just looked at me sadly, and sighed. (Alright. Don't believe me then...) He muttered.  
  
(What?) I said. ( I didn't catch that.)  
  
( I said, thank you Doctor, for your help. Now I'll just go...tell the others, I guess.)  
  
(Wait. I'll check you first, then they can come in one by one.)  
  
(But we're fine!)  
  
(No. You are not 'fine'! I've just seen good proof that one of you is mentally damaged! I have good reason to suspect the rest of you have depression problems, and all sorts of things that must be seen to!)  
  
Tobias looked very annoyed, almost as if he would have liked to knock me out.  
  
(Fine.) He said, rather angrily. I cringed a bit. Perhaps I had been a bit...smug...  
  
After all, I was an Andalite.  
  
He told Aximili to leave and tell the others he would be out soon.  
  
Well, that's chappie four. Sorry if it's boring. I'm really just getting into the story. Thinking of going back and rewriting a huge bit of it. Maybe all. Please guys! You read it, now review it! I gotta know! Tell me which parts you think need to be re-written, and which don't! Be honest please! (Of course, if you like it, I have NO qualms about that, and THANK YOU! I'm glad you do!)  
  
I'll get chappie five up soon. But I need lotsa reviews first! So I can know before I go to the trouble of writing!  
  
Love yaz! N' thanks for readings! 


	5. Hmmmight be a wee bit of a problem on th...

Chapter 5

DISCLAIMER: Thanks to you all for your reviews. I tried to wait a while before I wrote this. Make sure I got lotsa reviews!

But I was just dying to update and all you cute little fans with your enthusiastic little reviews was just more tempation than I could stand! So here we go!

Well, as I said before, I did not create the Animorphs. They are K.A. Applegate's mind enema (lol, just kidding!), sadly not mine.

Enjoy! I love you all!

Tobias' POV

"No way. No. Frickin'. Way. Is he still here!" Marco yelled at me.

I sighed. I had a pounding headache. They wouldn't believe me! Or at least, Marco wouldn't anyway.

"It is possible Marco! Anyone who could...eat souls...could...could very well still be in him!" Menderash said, eyes glued to Ax the whole time. "He could have just been hiding in Prince Aximili all this time!"

"What! Don't be stupid Menderash! He doesn't have to hide! He's the frickin' Grim Reaper! He's Mr Soul Eater, remember!"

"Okay! Shut up! Everybody just SHUT UP okay!" Jake said. He sighed and rubbed the bridge of nose between his eyes. "Look. Tobias, I believe that it's possible the One could still have Ax. But explain to me, how that works!"

I sighed. "I don't...I don't know."

"He doesn't know! Whoo! There you go! That's great!" Marco said sarcastically. "Look, Tobias, I know you hate to accept this possibility, but maybe she's right. Maybe Ax is a little wound up after all this! Maybe he is..." Marco left off. He rubbed the back of his neck and looked down.

Ax looked up at Marco with all four eyes. Eyes full of sorrow. Ax knew.

They all thought he was just nuts.

I couldn't believe this!

(Hold on, okay. Hold the farm just a minute!) I said. (You guys, we have seen the Ellimist! We've seen Crayak! We have gone billions of years back in time and tangoed with frickin' dinosaurs and eaten space crab brocolli. And now, you're going to tell me that this isn't possible?)

Santorelli and Jean looked confused. Menderash just stared at me, one eyebrow raised.

"Space crab brocolli?" The three of them said.

"It's...it's like...way another story okay? Maybe some day later-"

(When we're not dealing with our own sad mental problems!) Marco snapped, cutting me off. (You heard the doctor okay! Just face it Tobias! You just don't want to!)

I exploded. (So I guess you think we should just throw him in some Andalite nuthouse huh! Is that it Marco!)

He remained silent, looking down again. I looked around at everyone desperately.

(Well?) I demorphed from andalite to hawk. She had checked me up in my natural hawk form. She had checked us all up. I thought that as she left, she looked rather disappointed that nobody else went nuts or did anything strange during their check up. Except maybe Menderash. He kept winking at her. Apparently she thought he had a twitch and told him to do something very relaxing. He came out of the medi bay with a large bruise on the side of his face when he made a rather disparaging suggestion of just the most relaxing thing he could do. (It involved her.)

"Look." Jake said. "Just explain to me what you think we should do Tobias."

( I don't know... I don't...) I sighed. (I barely even understand this myself.)

I turned to Ax. (Ax. What...what happened on the ship?)

Ax shrugged. (I...I don't know. One minute, the One had me, and the next...you rammed the ship...and then...I was back in my own body!)

Was he concealing something? I looked at Jake. He made eye contact with me and nodded. He looked to Marco and Marco nodded too.

We had gone on board the ship and found Ax, lying on the floor, in his own body. Just Ax. Everyone else was gone. Dead. Killed on impact.

Or we supposed, anyway.

We all stood quietly. Tired. Thinking. Emotionally drained. I don't know about anybody else, but I just felt like getting back into bed and ending the day.

And then the Ellimist showed up.


	6. Ellimist saves the day! Or not

DISCLAIMER: If you thought the last chapter was wack, it's about to get a whole lot wackier baby! I don't own the Animorphs, I just love them!  
  
I'd like to dedicate this to all you wonderful people out there who actually took the time to review!!! Thanks ya! Love yaz!!!  
  
Tobias POV  
  
"I knew it!" Marco said. "I just knew HE had something to do with all this!"  
  
We all groaned as the Ellimist grinned at us. He was in an andalite body this time.  
  
YES. I WOULD HAVE A HAND IN SOMETHING LIKE THIS WOULDN'T I?  
  
"Uh, could you do away with the sonic boom thing for a while and try to keep it to a minimum roar?!" Marco said, covering his ears.  
  
SORRY. He boomed again, grinning broader. (I came to explain.)  
  
"Good!" Jake said, looking fully interested and awake now.  
  
(Thank the stars!) Ax said.  
  
(You see, Aximili is now the product of an agreement between myself-)  
  
(And Crayak.) I said. If I'd been in human morph, I would have rolled my eyes. Crayak would be in this too. Of course! I should have known! It was so obvious!  
  
"What kind of agreement?" Jake spoke in a low, dangerous tone; he looked tense.  
  
The Ellimist seemed to sigh. Suddenly the room felt darker.  
  
(It was all I could do to save Aximili. You see, Crayak loved the One. It was his favorite pawn.)  
  
"Of course." Marco said wryly. "He would have a pet dog like that."  
  
(He was unwilling to sacrifice the One. I was unwilling to sacrifice Aximili. He is...important.)  
  
(How?) I asked.  
  
The Ellimist's andalite main eyes looked directly at me.  
  
(He is all you have. Therefore, he is necessary to your will to live. I know exactly what would happen if you lost Aximili. And so, if I sacrificed him, I would lose another pawn as well. You.)  
  
(Why do I matter?! What's so important about me?!)  
  
Then he smiled that annoying, I-know-something-you-don't-know-but-you'll- find-it-out-eventually-in-life-and-you'll-just-have-to-wait-till-then- Ellimist smile.  
  
And then he said the most agitating, predictable words in all of history.  
  
(You will see.)  
  
(GRAAAAH!) I yelled in thoughtspeak. Jean actually giggled a little. Then she surpressed it.  
  
Marco looked seriously at the Ellimist, his eyes narrowed.  
  
"But what was the deal?"  
  
The Ellimist actually looked sorrowful.  
  
(Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill will be the new host body to the One, until his death.)  
  
(WHAT?!) I screamed. (WHY?!)  
  
Ax's eyes were wide with horror. Then they turned into a sadistic grin. The One was fighting for control again.  
  
"In exchange for what?" Jake asked flatly, speaking softly.  
  
(For the final freedom of the many souls that the One had consumed.)  
  
There was absolute silence.  
  
I looked over at Ax. He was looking at the floor of the ship. An almost agonized look on his face. He was trembling.  
  
"So..." Jake said. "They're all...really..."  
  
(Dead. Yes. Their souls went where souls were meant to go.)  
  
(In exchange for Ax's!) I yelled.  
  
The Ellimist shook his andalite head slowly.  
  
(No. The One does not have Aximili's soul. There are rules to the agreement.)  
  
(What?) I snapped.  
  
(1. Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill is indestructible. 2. Aximili-Esgarrouth- Isthill shares control of his body with the One. 3. At the end of a 75 year life span, Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill's body will undergo a 24 hour period in which it will un age to infancy, and he will have another 75 year life span until he undergoes the next 24 hour unaging period.) The Ellimist rattled these rules off in a monotone, automatic, almost military voice.  
  
We stared.  
  
(What? I...I don't understand.) I said.  
  
"Whoa! Me neither!" Marco said, looking about as confused as I'd ever seen him. Ax/ the One just stared off into space. Neither seemed to know what to make of it. Neither really had anything to gloat about yet.  
  
(You... you mean...he is...immortal?) Menderash said, eyes wide. Menderash was shaking at the sight of the Ellimist. So were Jean and Santorelli. They weren't as used to him popping up as we were. Jake had probably explained who he was to them, for they didn't seem too surprised to see him. Just scared witless by him.  
  
I wasn't afraid of the Ellimist, but I was afraid of this 'agreement' between him and Crayak.  
  
And Ax...what was he feeling now?!  
  
(No.) The Ellimist said, almost smiling at our simplicity.  
  
"You said he was indestructible!" Jake said.  
  
The Ellimist nodded slowly. (Yes. His new body cannot be destroyed by disease or hunger or weapons. Wounds will heal themselves. Without morphing technology.)  
  
"What's with the whole, 75 year life span, 24 hour unaging?!" Jake asked.  
  
(Aximili will live 75 years at a time. Then, on the dawn of the first day of his 76th year, he will begin to unage. He will revert to infancy, physically...and mentally. He will then begin to live another 75 years.)  
  
"Whoa." Marco said. "That's actually kinda cool! And Crayak agreed to this?!"  
  
I shook my hawk head. There was something mega wrong with all this.  
  
(That's not it guys!) I said. (What about the One? Where will he go when Ax unages and lives again?)  
  
The Ellimist looked Ax directly in the eyes. Ax looked up at him, terrified.  
  
(He will live on, with Aximili, in his body. He is confined to Aximili's body, until Aximili dies.)  
  
"I still don't get it!" Jake said. "How can he die if he can't be killed by wounds, disease, aging, or hunger?! How can he still be mortal?"  
  
Marco clicked. His eyes widened as if something dawned on him.  
  
"Decapitation?" He asked the Ellimist.  
  
The Ellimist nodded and smiled at Marco's quickness. (Yes.)  
  
"What about limbs?"  
  
(Any tissue lost will be regrown.)  
  
We all stood silently. I looked at Ax again.  
  
His form was shaking. He was sobbing. He looked up at the Ellimist.  
  
(Why?)  
  
The Ellimist looked down at him sadly.  
  
(You are one of the pawns I cannot compromise. Perhaps later I could have. But Crayak would not agree. And the One was beginning to be a bit of a problem anyway.) He smiled with his andalite eyes, wryly. (So we made an agreement. Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill lives, the souls are freed, the One is stopped, but Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill is the lifetime host of the One. However long Aximili lives, anyway.)  
  
"You don't know." Jake said.  
  
(No. But he does have a choice as to it.) The Ellimist said, grimly.  
  
I shook my head not believing. (That's sick! That's not fair!)  
  
"Yeah." Marco said. "It's like the choice you gave Tobias when he got his powers back!"  
  
(No.) I said. (It's even worse! I had the choice between fighting and being safe. Living and possibly dying! He doesn't even have that choice!)  
  
(Yes.) The Ellimist said quietly. (He does.)  
  
(No! He doesn't!) I raged. (You gave him the choice between death, and eternal death!) 


	7. Ax's New Life Long not really Partner

DISCLAIMER: Sorry if this is gettin' too weird guys! It will improve! I promise! Just stick with me please! Oh, and same disclaimer as usual!!!  
  
Ax's POV  
  
We were all stunned. Not knowing what to say or do.  
  
I felt sick in my hearts. Like death was coming.  
  
But no...I slowly began to realize. Death would never come. And I could not cut off my own head, unless someone helped me. And my friends never would.  
  
I was doomed to eternal life.  
  
How ironic it seemed! I had just learned I would live forever. But I felt there was nothing to celebrate.  
  
I searched inside myself. The One...could he hear my thoughts?  
  
I asked the Ellimist. The One snickered at my obvious paranoia.  
  
(No Aximili. He is not a Yeerk.)  
  
(You said Ax was his host!) Tobias yelled in thoughtspeak again.  
  
(Aximili will have the upper hand as of control-)  
  
(NOOOOOO!) The One screamed in my thoughtspeak, seizing control for a few seconds, until I fought him down.  
  
(What was that then?!) Tobias screamed at the Ellimist.  
  
(The One will be capable of seizing momentary control, when Aximili is not paying attention, or preoccupied. The One will never be capable of seizing control of more than one aspect of Aximili at a time. For example, thoughtspeak, Aximili's tail blade, Aximili's face, and so on.)  
  
The One was comforted at that. Quite pleased. He forced my eyes into a smug smile. I fought him down again.  
  
(I will gain control Aximili.) He snickered. (You will be uncapable of stopping me.) He was speaking to me privately in my own head. I shuddered.  
  
(Yes.) He continued. (When you least expect it, I will.)  
  
I felt myself breaking down inside. No. This could not be it. This could not be how my life...my existence...would go. Not like this. Not forever...surely...  
  
(One more thing.) The Ellimist said, as he turned to leave and disappear into the wall of the ship again.  
  
(What?) Tobias snapped.  
  
The Ellimist looked at me, his eyes full of pity. He looked into my eyes.  
  
(Aximili will be able to temporarily escape the One. Through morphing.)  
  
Tobias cursed. (Oh, yeah, that's great! Two hours!)  
  
"He could stay in morph!" Marco said brightly.  
  
I felt a tiny, weak strain of hope. My hearts were full. Then the Ellimist shattered it.  
  
(No. If Aximili stays in another body, the One will follow. I'm sorry. There is no way out of this agreement.)  
  
Marco cursed and grabbed a bowl off the table. He slammed it onto the floor where it smashed in thousands of pieces. It caused Jean to jump and let out a small cry. Her eyes were already full of tears, and red.  
  
Tobias was staring at the floor.  
  
Prince Jake's eyes were shut tightly.  
  
The Ellimist looked sorrowfully into my eyes one last time. (I'm sorry.) Then he said privately.  
  
(You chose.)  
  
And he left me alone, to suffer my choice.  
  
I had chosen. I just hadn't realized what I was getting into.  
  
***  
  
Okay, Waaaaaaay sorry if that seemed like too far fetched, but I just had to have some explanation as to Axie poo's condition! And yes, the Ellimist did let Ax choose, when the ships collided. (But you'll see later!)  
  
I'm sorry I haven't really delivered on the whole 'love story part'. I feel like I've just majorly side tracked into the Twilight Zone of Animorphs, but I couldn't really see any other way of Ax being rescued or saved from the One, and I didn't like the idea of him dying. Ax is like my fave character besides Tobias (They're both so cute! It must run in the family! Elfangor was cute too!He never should have died!) and I could never resign myself to writing about Ax being 'doomed' or him dying. It would be too painful.  
  
Though I didn't really bank on the whole 'next to immortality' thing. That kinda just popped into my head. Oh well...kinda late for the whole maybe-I- shouldn't-have-written-that thing now...  
  
This has kind of turned into a story about Ax too, but I will mainly stick to Tobias's and L'Aini's points of view, maybe reverting temporarily to Ax, every now and then. Though I do like the idea of a long lasting Energizer Ax. Hmm... kinda gives me a whole other idea for a series...  
  
Anyway. I felt that I had to explain how Ax survived. I didn't want to have poor Axie poo sitting around with the One in his head and no explanation of how he got there for several chapters, while I elaborated on Tobias's coming relationship and went into gushy details. I simply could never just ignore Ax's plight. Even for just one little chapter! I meant to make it as "realistic" as possible, and I thought the Ellimist being involved would be a perfectly (in the Animorph sense) "normal" way to explain it.  
  
Boyyy, was I wrong...  
  
But I'm jabbering now, and beginning to feel like that little old white haired guy in the middle of the Matrix that Neo talks to in the Matrix Reloaded (2) (Such a cool movie by the way, though I thought the first was way better. I couldn't understand half of what that little white haired guy was saying after a while! Way too complicated for my simple little ADHD brain...) ; )  
  
Well, I will write more, my dear readers!  
  
Love yaz! Now go and review please!!!  
  
-Birdie num num  
  
P.S. Besides, I've noticed alot of you use the Ellimist to explain stuff in your own fanfics, so be ye not quick to judge!!! Lest ye be judged yourselves!!! Man, it could almost be a key to writing Animorph fanfics; when in doubt, use the Ellimist.  
  
Or Crayak. Drode. All of them, really... 


	8. L'Aini speaks

DISCLAIMER: Phew! Getting kinda tired! Been writin' fanfics all day. I swear, I have like, no life. I need to go read the Great Gatsby and do a study guide and collect bugs for my bug board project and all that stuff...  
  
OH WELL. This is like, way better...  
  
Here we goooo!  
  
Oh, and this is dedicated to my bud Wraithlord42. And all you other people who like this. Though I've noticed my other, ahem, sillier fanfics, shall we say, seem to be much more popular. Ah, well. Sigh, pleasing the masses, I swear...  
  
Enjoy.  
  
(Doctor) L'Aini's POV.  
  
I left my scoop that morning, my seven year old daughter Yani-Ashmit-Ulaak was waving me goodbye. She was having a school holiday.  
  
(Mother!) She called out at the last minute.  
  
(Yes my daughter?)  
  
(May I go to Giugin's scoop today?)  
  
I sighed. (Alright! Do not come home late again, do you hear me?! You need to work on your studies!)  
  
(Wheee! Thank you mother!) She began to run in the direction of her friend's scoop.  
  
(Be careful! Stay away from the cliffs! Don't let me catch you playing near there again!)  
  
I smiled and ran to the Rachel. Yani, that little rascal, had been neglecting her work again. Of course, she had very good excuse too...  
  
Breathing raggedly, I slowed down. Of course, so did I.  
  
(No.) I said to myself. (Mother's wrong. I need my work.) It kept me from thinking about Kascherm. And my little Anukili.  
  
I ran on, grief trying to overtake me. I forced back the sobs that threatened to surface, and my pounding aching hearts drove me onward.  
  
I stood at the portal of the Rachel, on the ramp, trying to regain composure.  
  
Don't think about them. Don't think about them. Stop it stop it stop it!!!  
  
To my surprise the door opened. Marco the human stood there scowling. "Well if it isn't Dr Quin, medicine Andalite chic! Man, I wish you'd been right about the whole multiple personality thing!"  
  
I felt a little stunned. What was he talking about?  
  
"Come in Dr!" A more authoritative voice called out. Prince Jake, most likely.  
  
I walked in. They were all seated having what humans call "breakfast" again. Menderash, that rude perverted nothlit, passed by me to go out and feed, cringing a little from me. His face was still swelling with the lump I'd given him. My eyes gave his a warning look as he passed and I shook my tail a little, so he'd know. He hurried by, whimpering a little.  
  
Prince Jake was seated in a huge chair designed for Hork Bajir. He was leaned back relaxed. They were all there as the day before, but strangely silent this time. No bantering or joking. I saw Aximili nowhere. Tobias was in human form. He looked sadly at me and smiled and said  
  
"Hey Doc."  
  
I bobbed my eyestalks civilly to him. I looked around for Aximili. I saw a human I hadn't seen before sitting at the table...eating a cinnamon. He had a relaxed look to him. As though he had been freed from an incredible pain. He kept looking at a clock on the wall, nervously and with dread.  
  
(Is that-) I asked Tobias.  
  
"Yes. That's Ax in human morph." He definitely sounded sad. I looked closely at him.  
  
(Did something happen?)  
  
"Yeah. Something happened!" Marco the human yelled. I sighed. I had been expecting him to say something the past few minutes. My eyestalks had watched him as he paced around anxiously. "The One is back!"  
  
I groaned in thoughtspeak. So they were all in on this now! I laughed. (You are not going to stand there and tell me that! I refuse to stay here and listen to this nonsense!)  
  
"Fine then. Leave." Prince Jake said. I stared shocked for a few seconds. The human Santorelli smirked a little. The others, even Marco, struggeld not to smile.  
  
(I...I...I will not! This andalite badly needs medical help! And I'm beginning to suspect that all of you do!) I said, looking around at all of them.  
  
I felt pure annoyance as Prince Jake smiled and shook his head at me. "The Ellimist came and explained everything to us."  
  
(Ahaa! Ha haa!) I laughed derisively. (Ellimists! And now it's Ellimists?! Oh this is sad! This is absolutely a ridiculous waste of my time!)  
  
I walked over to Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill who was now demorphing.  
  
(Aximili.) I began. (Despite what your friends have told you, or tried to convince you of, that voice in your head is not-)  
  
FWAPP! The flat of his tailblade came out and struck the side of my face! It knocked me to the ground.  
  
Marco burst into laughter.  
  
Aximili, sounding completely different, said (You don't know anything about the "voice in my head".)  
  
Tobias helped me stand. I burst into sobbing. This was more than I could take in one day!  
  
Marco's laughter stopped as he saw the glare on Jean's face and realized I was sobbing. He looked down in shame at his feet. Tobias tried to comfort me. He placed human arms around my shoulders.  
  
"Shh. I'm sorry ma'am! Shhh. It's okay." He gently inspected the new bruise on the side of my face.  
  
Aximili seemed to be rocking a little. His eyes were closed tight. When he next opened them, he seemed to relax. Then he looked to me.  
  
(I...I...I'm so sorry!-)  
  
I probably shouldn't have reacted the way I did next, but I shoved Tobias away and ran to the door. I turned back and screamed at him.  
  
(No! I have seen it with my own eyes! I'm going to tell my superiors all about this! He's dangerous! He needs to be restrained!)  
  
I turned and ran, without looking. And ran into and bounced off of someone. I landed, winded, on my side. I glared up at the person. Then I screamed.  
  
IT...IT...it was...some...thing...it was small and wrinkled, and-  
  
"Drode!" Marco said it like a curse. "I should have known if the Ellimist would show up, Crayak would!"  
  
"Yeah." Prince Jake said. He was sitting down calmly still. He didn't even look at the creature Marco had called the Drode.  
  
The creature named the Drode glared down at me.  
  
"Stupid Andalite! Don't you ever watch where you're going?! You've got four silly eyes and you can't even see someone standing right in front of you. Honestly, you're all a waste of oxygen. It's a pity the Yeerks didn't win!"  
  
"Yeah, I know." Marco snapped back at him. "She didn't even manage to see the small, prune, version of Barney the dinosaur."  
  
I felt confused. Whose side was Marco on anyway?! And who was this creature? I slowly got up, cringing from it. I moved back and jumped as I encountered Tobias. He gently pulled me out of the way of the Drode, who now strolled imperiously past Marco. He said back over his shoulder to Marco.  
  
"She didn't even manage to see the small, prune version of Barney the dinosaur." He said, mocking Marco, perfectly imitating his voice. Marco looked shocked. So was I. Then the Drode said. "You know, what's really funny is you have millions of dollars now, your own show, and you can't even manage to get a decent girlfriend." He cackled. Marco's face reddened and he picked up a metal box, as if about to throw it. He held back though.  
  
The Drode cackled again. "That's right Marco. Throw something at me. See how much it hurts me!" The Drode strolled over to Prince Jake.  
  
"Tell your friend to put that down." He snapped.  
  
Prince Jake looked calmly at him. He blinked. "Marco. Put it down, please."  
  
Marco slammed it down on a control console angrily, and sat down, still tense, his eyes watching the Drode's every move.  
  
The Drode smiled, as he stood in front of Prince Jake. "Thank you, Jake. You're such a good leader. Ah, silence. You know, now that Rachel's gone, you're a much more pleasant group to be around."  
  
Prince Jake stood, his eyes dangerous suddenly. He advanced toward the Drode, slowly, menacingly. The Drode smiled, pleased with himself, until he looked up at Prince Jake's face. Then he almost seemed frightened.  
  
He quickly moved away from Prince Jake, and over to Aximili, whose eyes were now wary, frightened, watching the Drode's every move as well.  
  
"Aximili!" He said, and grinned. "Hello once again! How are you?! Just lovely I see! Having a good time with your new friend?" The Drode laughed.  
  
"What do you want, Drode?" Jake snapped.  
  
"I just came to tell Aximili that my master is very pleased of the choice he made!"  
  
(Choice? What choice?) Tobias said, moving forward. He had demorphed to hawk, then morphed to andalite. I felt a trill of fear. Was this creature dangerous enough for him to feel like he need a tail blade, or was he just doing so to comfort himself.  
  
I hoped desparately that it was the latter.  
  
"Oh yeeeeesss! That's right! You don't know!" He said, and grinned. He turned to Aximili. "That's right! You haven't told them yet have you?!"  
  
Aximili closed his eyes and looked away.  
  
"What. Choice.?" Prince Jake said, sounding oddly, eerily calm. His arms were crossed over his chest.  
  
The Drode smiled. "Tell them Aximili." He mocked."Tell your friends about your 'noble' choice!" He snickered, and turned and walked behind a metal column.  
  
And didn't walk out from behind the other side.  
  
I felt shivers going down my back.  
  
(What's going on?! Who was that?!) I said to Tobias.  
  
(Shut up!) He hissed back. (Ax. Tell us.)  
  
Aximili stood silently. His torso bended forward. His eyestalks were drooping.  
  
I felt anger. How dare he tell me to shut up!  
  
If Kascherm were here, why, he would...  
  
I felt sorrow. He wasn't here.  
  
No! Stop thinking that L'Aini! You'll drive yourself insane!  
  
No. I felt angry at myself suddenly. If Kascherm were here, I would not depend on him to defend me! I would defend myself!  
  
I glared at Tobias. (Don't you dare! Ever! Tell me to shut up again!) I snapped viciously at him.  
  
He glared at me for a second, then turned back to Aximili and ignored me.  
  
(Tell us Ax.) He said softer this time.  
  
Aximili's eyes looked sorrowfully up at us all. Those eyes...they...they were so full of anguish!  
  
(I...I wanted to live...) He wept. ( I wanted you all to live...so much...)  
  
"What?" Marco said softly. "What is it Ax man?"  
  
Aximili straightened up, sighed, and began to tell everyone, including me, a story that I would never forget. That would change the way I looked at everything.  
  
A story that would forever change everything I knew to be true and to exist... 


	9. Ax's Story

DISCLAIMER: Don't own 'em just love 'em yadda yadda yadda!  
  
Okay. Now.  
  
This is dedicated to Wraithlord42.  
  
Gotta get on with the story. There will be more dedications later.  
  
Ax's POV.  
  
Before the collision of the One's ship and the Rachel...  
  
***  
  
I could not believe that it had come to this. I saw Prince Jake smile.  
  
"Let's do it!"  
  
I loved him and hated him so much then! The sad, lone human who had once been my prince. And before that a happy, normal young human. Before the Yeerks.  
  
What little mind I had left whirled.  
  
Before I knew it, the One was yelling and the Rachel was hurtling toward us.  
  
So this is how it would all end!  
  
No! Not Tobias! I couldn't let him die!  
  
Oh if there was only some way I could...only some way of his living, I would...  
  
The Rachel's nose was inches away from contact with the One's ship.  
  
And all of Time froze.  
  
I was no longer in the One. I was no longer part of him.  
  
I stood, freely, in my own Andalite body!  
  
I felt joy instantly.  
  
Then I wondered. Was I dead? Was this death?  
  
I was in non space.  
  
Wait...  
  
The Ellimist!  
  
(Ellimist?) I asked, softly.  
  
And he appeared out of the darkness, walking toward me.  
  
(Hello Aximili.) He was in andalite form.  
  
So strange. The andalite form so closely resembled Elfangor.  
  
I breathed in my body. It felt...new. I don't know how else to describe it.  
  
Of course, I told myself. My real body is dead...  
  
This body was...new. I felt no aches or pains anywhere. There were no scars on this body.  
  
I felt young. I felt like a child again. Fresh. Like I could go on for hours, running around and laughing. But it was the same age as my body! Or it appeared so, anyway...  
  
(Ellimist,) I said. (What is this? What's going on? How am I in my body again?!)  
  
He smiled at my numerous questions.  
  
(Do not be afraid, Aximili.) Then he seemed sad. (You said you would do anything to save Tobias and the Animorphs.)  
  
I felt nervous suddenly. (Well, yes...something like that...)  
  
He laughed. (Aximili. I can give you that chance.)  
  
My hearts felt like they would burst from hope and joy.  
  
(Really?)  
  
The Ellimist looked sorrowful again. (Yes. But it will mean an incredible sacrifice on your part.)  
  
(Life?) I said. If it was life, well, I would give it! My life was meaningless to me now...  
  
(No.) The Ellimist said. (Death.)  
  
I felt confused. (What?)  
  
He walked over to me and a huge screen appeared.  
  
I laughed, amazed. I could see the two ships about to collide. I observed closer, with all four of my eyes, and saw that I could see everyone and everything frozen in time. I could see them all. Even the One. I could see their individual expressions. On Prince Jake, a frightening look of pure determination, an almost grin. Marco and Tobias stood beside him; though their eyes were closed, (and Marco was grimacing), they were standing tall beside Prince Jake. A human, and another andalite stood tall in the back round. The andalite had all four eyes facing forward, wide, but like Prince Jake's, determined. The human's eyes were wide. Another human, a female, had her eyes closed, and her body curled up, hugging her knees. They were all frozen. Even their very strands of hair were still in place. The One's eyes were wide with shock and terror. I couldn't help but smile and laugh at my opponent. My tormentor, now with terror in his eyes. I could see the very molecules of energy in the ships' engines frozen in place.  
  
I studied this whole scene with all four eyes.  
  
(So...I'm not dead yet?) I asked him.  
  
(You could be.) He replied.  
  
I turned and looked at him, confused. (So, you stopped it.)  
  
(Yes.)  
  
(Why?)  
  
(I told you. I'm giving you a choice. I can rescue you. And Tobias. And the Animorphs. All from death. For a price.)  
  
(Or...) I said.  
  
(Or you can choose to go back, and I will let Time loose and you can take your chances.)  
  
I shook my head. I didn't want to take my chances. Certainly not with Tobias's and Prince Jake's lives either. If I could keep them from death or pain...  
  
(What is the price?) I asked.  
  
He squared his andalite shoulders and looked me in the eye. (The...risk...of immortality.)  
  
I laughed. (That's a price? It sounds more like something someone would try to buy.)  
  
(You don't understand. Of course, I haven't told you yet. Your immortality would be...shared...)  
  
(Shared?) I felt cold fingers grabbing my spine and hearts.  
  
(You would be...symbiotic. Not a slave.)  
  
I looked him in the eyes.  
  
(With who?)  
  
(The One.)  
  
I rocked back, stunned. I shook my head again. (I don't understand!)  
  
(You would share your new body with him. Forever.)  
  
I stared at him.  
  
'Your new body', he had said. New? I looked myself over again. With shock I realized I could find none of my old battle scars. No aches or pains. The pain in my neck that I'd had when I was last in my body was gone. My fur was thick and glossy. My legs, tail, and hooves were strong. My eyesight, hearing, and sense of smell were next to perfect. It was as though I had been completely renovated, like a ship at a docking port.  
  
I looked at him. (What do you mean by sharing my body, exactly.)  
  
(You would have a little control over him. Just a bit more control than him.)  
  
I nodded, still horrified. I had wanted my body completely back, not partially back.  
  
With an aching pain in my hearts, I realized that was impossible. That body was too far gone to ever come back.  
  
And yet...here I stood.  
  
(Why...why can't I just have this body and take my chances?)  
  
He shook his head. (No. I cannot simply interfere.)  
  
(Why not?!) I yelled. (You did nothing while Rachel died! Why are you even asking me this?!)  
  
(Tobias is important. You are important. Jake is important.)  
  
(How?!) I asked.  
  
He shook his head. (I'm sorry. You must either accept the deal, or not.)  
  
I sighed. I tried to think. (What...what did you mean by "at the risk of immortality"?)  
  
(You would live in cycles. There would be conditions. Almost no possibility of death. You would regenerate every so many decades, at the amount of years of Crayak's choosing.)  
  
(Crayak!) I yelled. (What has he to do with this?!)  
  
(Plenty. He is involved in the game. I cannot exclude him.) He replied calmly.  
  
(GAME!) I roared in thoughtspeak. My tail felt the need to jam into his face. (WE ARE NOTHING BUT A GAME TO YOU! AN AMUSEMENT!)  
  
He looked sadly at me, then looked down. He seemed to be aching inside. Weary.  
  
He looked up at me again. Cold resolve was in his eyes.  
  
(I have given you a choice, andalite. You will choose. Your friends can live, possibly. You can live, but you will still be controlled by the One. Or you can choose to have your own body. And minimal control over the One. Choose.)  
  
I stared back at him. Unbelieving, for what seemed like an ice age.  
  
I sighed. (Very well.)  
  
The Drode came walking up, and I jumped a little at his presence.  
  
"Ah, Aximili!" He yelled. "You've made Master Crayak very happy!" He grinned. "Well aren't you going to thank him for his wonderful gift?"  
  
I looked to the Ellimist, to see if I was making the right choice. But he said nothing, and his expression gave nothing away. He was now in the form of an old human male that he sometimes takes. He was calm, with a self absorbed look, and when his eyes looked over the Drode, a hint of disgust showed in his features.  
  
"Why are you here?"  
  
Drode looked nonchalantly at him. "I came to make sure that you were telling this andalite about Master Crayak's deal."  
  
The Ellimist laughed scornfully. "And I suppose your 'Master' would excercise his wrath on me if I didn't?" He sneered at 'wrath'.  
  
The Drode seemed to flame a brilliant scarlet red at the Ellimist's talk of his 'Master'. "One day...one day Crayak will have you on your face and you will beg-"  
  
"LEAVE!" The Ellimist roared, his eyes angry. The Drode let out a little yip of a whimper, then ran. He tried to look dignified as he left, but it was too late for that.  
  
After he left, I couldn't help but smile. The Ellimist sighed aloud.  
  
He turned to me.  
  
(Then you have made your choice?)  
  
I thought a moment.  
  
(What...which choice will benefit the universe most?) I asked.  
  
The Ellimist seemed to smile, as if he was relieved.  
  
(You are important. Tobias is important. Jake is important. Everyone on that ship, is important.)  
  
(Even the One.)  
  
(Yes. Though he is...unnecessary...in his present form.) He smiled wryly, and I could tell the One must have been causing his 'game' some trouble. I felt hate and loathing for him for a moment. Then I threw it away with all of my other feelings that seemed worthless at the moment. And I was feeling quite alot right then.  
  
I nodded slowly. (Very well.) I lifted my chin. (I accept your de-)  
  
BOOM!  
  
And I was back on the ship, in my own, new body, the One very confused in my head, and a broken arm, a few cracked ribs and a broken tail from the collision.  
  
IT'S NOT REALLY JUST MY DEAL, YOU KNOW. The Ellimist replied in my head.  
  
And I fainted; blacking out from the pain of my wounds.  
  
***  
  
I stood there. I had told them all I knew. And I wondered now if that silly doctor would believe me.  
  
***  
  
Okay...sorry if that was far fetched too, but hey! It's the Animorphs, for crying out loud!  
  
And it's fanFICTION. So get over it. This is my little imaginary universe here, and if you don't like it, you can go indulge in somebody else's little fanfic imaginary universe. Go ahead! Have fun!  
  
But first, go review this one!!! Hope you enjoyed reading it, as much as I enjoyed writing it! 


	10. Kascherm and Anukili

DISCLAIMER: aldfjlakfjaldfjalsfkdjalsfdjlsalfkajdlf!!!  
  
Ah, yes. Got that over with eh?! Heh heh heh!  
  
Can't read Norwegian? Good. Neither can I!  
  
Okay. Now. Story time!  
  
Oh crap...dedications!  
  
Okay; Wraithlord, michelle, and all the other kiddies who like it!  
  
Now! Story time!  
  
*bloodthirsty audience* STORY! STORY! STORY!  
  
Okay okay! Jeez!  
  
*sigh*  
  
*Birdie mutters* There are other slave drivers beside Visser Three...  
  
Okay! On with the story!  
  
Aaaaaand...  
  
Chapter...whatever # this is now...9? no...10. Oh! Okay!  
  
L'Aini's POV  
  
I stared, uncomprehending at the andalite who had just spoken, or tried to show us throught thoughtspeak, the conversation he had had between himself and this bizarre creature. This Ellimist.  
  
I had heard of Ellimists in my youth. My childhood, to be precise. Mother would tell us on windy nights as we sat in our scoop, close together, of the tricks of the Ellimist or Ellimists. How many there were was unknown. And I would get delicious jittery shivers, thinking of the Ellimist(s) as I drifted off to sleep, snug and safe, surrounded by my siblings.  
  
I smiled at these precious memories of a time when I didn't understand the universe. When I believed in things more. When stories made more sense that written history and fact did.  
  
I was snapped out of my reverie by Marco's voice.  
  
"So you...you...chose this?"  
  
Aximili nodded slowly, his eyes looking full of pain. (Yes. Of course.)  
  
(Why?) Tobias said.  
  
Aximili put his hands to his ears and seemed to shake almost convulsively for a second. His hands slipped up on top of his head, fingers in his fur, almost pulling at it, as if to rip it out.  
  
(It seemed like the best choice!) He sobbed with a desparate cry of inner agony. Marco went forward and helped him up onto his hooves, as he fell to his knees.  
  
I felt awful deep inside. That I had ever accused this poor, wretched, accursed creature of insanity. The only one who was insane, was me.  
  
He didn't need medicine. There was no treatment for what he had.  
  
But I felt the very verge of insanity in him. He was on the very brink of it. Dangerously close.  
  
I turned to Tobias. (He needs something.) I said softly.  
  
(What?) He snapped. (More medicine?! Drugs?! Don't you see?! You still don't believe him?! Didn't you see the prune looking guy!!!) He raged at me.  
  
(No!) I hissed back. (That's not what I meant! That's not what I was going to say!)  
  
(Oh...) He blushed and looked down. (I...I'm sorry.)  
  
(Yes.)  
  
(You...you didn't exactly come peacefully aboard this ship, you know!) He said, looking a little annoyed.  
  
(Well...I...) I looked down at my hooves. (No. You're...) I sighed. (You're right. Perhaps I was...)  
  
He looked sadly at me. (What were you going to say?)  
  
I sighed, blushed a little, feeling foolish. (I...love...companionship, friendship, support.)  
  
He looked thoughtful. He looked over at Aximili, as though pondering him. Aximili was now in human morph again, enjoying another cinnamon bun. He looked rather relaxed and peaceful now.  
  
What awful things did the One say for Aximili to look so relieved to be rid of him for two hours only?  
  
Or was it the prospect of living forever that frightened Aximili?  
  
I sighed, feeling weary all of a sudden. I needed to go home, and cuddle my daughter, and sleep. Maybe talk to a friend via thought-screen. I rubbed my forehead with one hand.  
  
I noticed Tobias smiling at me. (Tired?)  
  
I laughed a little. (Yes. Very.)  
  
(Life.)  
  
(No. Not normal life, no. Something that happened...not too long ago. To me, anyway.)  
  
(Care to talk about it?)  
  
I smiled. Then felt it disappear. I breathed deeply. (No.)  
  
He nodded. (Okay. Cool.) Then he turned to me.  
  
(I know exactly what would make Ax's life way, way better right now. Maybe, anyway. If we do this right.)  
  
I smiled. (We?)  
  
He laughed. (Yes. I need your help.)  
  
I turned toward him more. (Why me?)  
  
He shrugged his shoulders. A strange gesture I had never seen an andalite do before. (I don't know. You're a doctor, aren't you? You're supposed to help him. So do your job.)  
  
I smiled. Bobbed my eyestalks. (Alright. So what is it you're planning on doing?)  
  
(It involves somebody he knew quite a while ago. A certain...smart aleck...)  
  
My curiousity was picqued. (A female?)  
  
He grinned. (Yep.)  
  
(And you want me to...)  
  
(Help me find her?) He looked imploringly at me. His hands came together in a gesture of plea.  
  
I sighed. (Alright. But why can't someone else help you find her?)  
  
He shrugged. (I have no idea where to even start looking! You're an andalite! Besides, I want to surprise him!) He rubbed his hands together and grinned.  
  
I smiled. There was something oddly consoling about this scruffy young, certainly unorthodox, if at all, andalite. He demorphed to his bird form, and even there, he looked quite pleased with himself and his idea. I had never met a bird capable of emitting such a vibe of smugness and I tried desparately not to giggle.  
  
(Hey! What's so funny?)  
  
I shook my head, hopelessly laughing now. (Oh, me! Nothing!) I turned to leave.  
  
(Hey! Where are you going?!)  
  
(Home!) I said.  
  
He looked for a moment like he wanted to ask if he could come along. I giggled in my head at the idea. And at what my answer to this odd little bird would be...  
  
He looked down. (You'll come back?)  
  
(Yes...) I said, and turned and left.  
  
As I was leaving out the ship's door, Menderash stood in front of me. He grinned suddenly, and I felt my face with my hand where Aximili had left the bruise. Or...the One, anyway. This would take some getting used to!  
  
He pointed and said. (HA!). Though my glare soon changed his smug look to a look of worry.  
  
I knocked him out of my way.  
  
He rolled rather nicely down the ramp and onto the grass. I glared imperiously down at him, and when I felt that I had sufficiently stared him into the dirt with his shame of his own actions, I trotted on towards home.  
  
***  
  
I was glad to get home again. My daughter was there, waiting for me with Giugin. I got there around midday, feeding as I ran. The two were sitting talking and giggling about something. Yani looked up and smiled at me.  
  
"Mother! You're back early today!" She trotted up to me and I embraced her little form.  
  
"So are you!" I said, genuinely surprised. Her little friend left a while later.  
  
I sat thinking, exhausted. Yani came over and sat by me. I wrapped my arms around her little torso and pulled her close.  
  
"How was your little visit?" I asked.  
  
"Fun." She replied. "Mother! I just heard from Giugin that her family is going to the South Coast in a few weeks, and she told me I could come too! Can I please go?!"  
  
I sighed. The idea of her going off leaving me alone...But it wasn't fiar of me. She needed to have fun. I smiled. "Of course love." I said.  
  
She grinned. "Wheee! Thank you Mathi!"  
  
"I love you." I said. "Be careful."  
  
"I love you too."  
  
"You'll have to thought-screen me every night you're there, and tell all about what you're doing!"  
  
She smiled. "Yes Mathi."  
  
I sat cuddling my daughter, and she leaned into me. The heat of the day and the cool shade of the scoop began to lull me to sleep.  
  
"Mathi." She said the Old-Andalite slang for 'mother' affectionately.  
  
"Daughti." I replied, and stroked the fur along the top of her head. I smiled at her sweet little face. She had so much of her father's spunk!  
  
My eyes moved over to the holographic little statues of my husband, Kascherm; and my little Anukili, my five year old son.  
  
I thought of how silent the scoop was now that they were gone!  
  
Usually Kascherm woudl be asking me where something was, and Anukili would be arguing about something with Yani and they would ask 'Fathi' who was right and he would say 'ask your mother' and as they swarmed around me and I glared at him, he would chuckle and go back to his work.  
  
My hearts ached for him now. My body ached for his next to mine at night. My arms longed to hold my little son.  
  
But they were gone now.  
  
And gone forever.  
  
My mind thought back to that first, awful night I slept alone.  
  
When my husband's childhood shorm, Prince Hanike, and his War Prince Zamishar came to tell me.  
  
I had been lying out near the opening of our little scoop, with Yani by my side.  
  
We had been watching the stars.  
  
"Where is the Hork Bajir Home world, Mathi?"  
  
I had smiled. "Billions of light years from here."  
  
"Oh!" She said in awe. "That far?!"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Why is Fathi so far?"  
  
"The Hork Bajir need Fathi's help."  
  
"Do the Hork Bajir need Anukili too?"  
  
"No. Fathi does." Perhaps there was a tone of anger in my voice. I had never really gotten over Kascherm taking Anukili with him to that planet, but he begged me so that I finally gave in.  
  
Besides, I couldn't stand the thought of my Kascherm all alone on that slug infested planet. I didn't care if the war was over on Earth. I didn't care if the Andalites had won back the Hork Bajir Home world. There was still danger.  
  
But he still took our little son with him.  
  
(Besides,) He had said. (This will be more educational for him than school!)  
  
(No it will not!) I had said.  
  
(It'll train him to be a great warrior!)  
  
I had snuggled my little one and said. (He will NOT be a warrior! He will never have to be! He'll be a great scientist!)  
  
(Ha!)  
  
Anukili had been so excited. He was going to travel on a ship with his father to a whole other planet!  
  
I simply had to protest when Kascherm gave him that toy Shredder that could actually stun people and knock them out unconscious for five whole minutes, but I ended up giving in on that too when they both gave me pleading expressions and Anukili looked about to cry when I said (NO KASCHERM! ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY OUT OF YOUR MIND?!)  
  
Kascherm had his own ship, the 'Star Hoober'. It was a small ship. Kascherm had gone to the Hork Bajir Home world to study the tree growth. The Yeerks had obliterated many trees; nearly ruined whole forest lands. Now that the war was almost over, and the Hork Bajir home world had been liberated, Cassie the human had been speaking with Earth's American president, and the Andalite Military officials guarding the Home world to see about transporting the free Hork Bajir of the free colony, back to their own home world again. They were also setting up a program whereby freed, surviving Hork Bajir could be guaranteed free, safe passage to their home world.  
  
Kascherm had been excited to receive this assignment. He was already a Prince and had fought in near twenty battles during the war, some of which had been directly physical and upfront (as in tailfighting was needed!) And he had survived them all. Now that his infantry years were over, he specialized in botany and biology, and he had been selected from about thirty other officers for this job.  
  
He was to go and study for 10 Andalite months and observe the tree growth, to see if the forest lands and rightful homes of the Hork Bajir could be restored to what they once were.  
  
Teams occassionally went out to see Kascherm and Anukili. But mostly it was just them, and an older Andalite, Dr. Esliers-Alune-Zepshut, a biologist. They often had the whole compound to themselves; just the three of them! I had often taken Yani and gone to see him. It was so beautiful there. The compound was amongst these tall, proud, massive trees. Chadoo scampered about in them. It was wonderful to see that the planet was still alive.  
  
Whenever I saw my little son, my hearts ached for my little family to be back together again.  
  
"Just six more months." He had said, gently. "Just six more months my Ainisha (his affectionate nickname for me.) "We will be together soon, my love."  
  
I trusted in him. I wanted so much to believe him. But I was so scared. So scared for my little baby...and my big baby, all alone and far away on that planet with only a silly old codger for company.  
  
Hanike came, that fateful night. And War-Prince Zamishar.  
  
I sat up as I saw him approaching. I blushed and stood, embarrassed that he should catch me on my back with my belly and four legs in the air. Yani stayed where she was. "Hullo Prince Hanike!" She called. I froze. He only stared sadly at little Yani, who lay trying to count the stars again. He looked at me and seemed unable to speak. I only looked at him, at his eyes, frozen with fear.  
  
Something was wrong...with Kascherm.  
  
Or was it my baby son?!  
  
Oh no...Prince Zamishar was here too!  
  
(W-War Prince Zamishar.) I spoke softly and bobbed my eyestalks.  
  
(It's...it's really...) He seemed to shock. (It's really quite alright m'dear, really. You can...) Again, he was faltering! (You can just call me Zamishar...)  
  
(What?! What is it?!) I cried out desparately.  
  
(I ah,) Hanike sighed, shuddering, breathing deeply. ( I must tell you something L'Aini.)  
  
(What?! Is is Kascherm? Anukili?!)  
  
He said (Yes.) Weakly.  
  
(Both!) I said, feeling shock. (Are they injured?! Oh! Where are they? I've got to go to them!)  
  
Hanike would not look me in the eyes.  
  
(N-no. They...they're not injured...they're fine. I mean,) He sobbed. (They're not fine. I...)  
  
(What?!) I screamed at last. (WHAT?!)  
  
(They...they...)  
  
(They're Yeerk slaves.) I said in shock. (They've been captured!) I gasped. My hearts ached. No! It could not be! Better to be dead!...  
  
He said. (No.) In the smallest, weakest voice yet. He fell to his knees. So did Zamishar.  
  
In the gapping silence, it slowly, horribly dawned on me. Then it struck me, as if the whole universe had suddenly slapped me and ripped my heart out.  
  
(They're dead.) I said weakly, not fully comprehending. Not understanding. Not believing.  
  
He only said. (Y-yes...) He went on. (Some Yeerk rebels got control of a ship. They flew around the surface of the planet, randomly dropping bombs. There was nothing anyone could do. By the time they were stopped, an hour later, hundreds were already dead.)  
  
I shook my head. (No.)  
  
He looked up at me. (L'Ainisha-)  
  
(Nooo!) I wailed, falling to my knees, suddenly weak.  
  
Zamishar spoke (Now L'Ainisha,) He quavered. (You must accept the inevitable. You must be strong. You must-)  
  
(NOOOO!) I screamed in thoughspeak. (THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING! THIS CAN'T!) I fell down sobbing.  
  
Little Yani came running over. She had seen us all fall to the ground, one by one. She had heard my thoughtspeak screams.  
  
(Mathi!) She called worriedly. (Mathi! What's happening?!) She ran up to me, put a hand on my shoulder.  
  
No! No! I would have to tell her! No! Never!  
  
(Mathi what is it?)  
  
(It's...your Fathi, your brother...) I broke into weeping. I could not tell her this! I had no strength for this!  
  
(What?! Are they hurt?! We can go to them Mathi, it's okay! We can help them and make them feel better!-)  
  
I snapped. I will never forgive myself for what I did next.  
  
(NO! You don't get it! They're DEAD!) I screamed, grabbing hold of her shoulders and shaking her roughly a few times. (They're DEAD and they're NOT COMING BACK! EVER!) I burst into sobbing and released her and pulled away from her and everyone. She ran off crying, and hid behind the scoop and cried.  
  
I stood on my hooves weakly, and began cutting myself with my own tail blade. Slashing my arms, my wrists, face, legs, back, shoulders, cutting my neck, stalk eyes, ears; anywhere I could reach on my body, I cut. Hanike tackled me and stopped me. So did Zamishar.  
  
And I was put in the pyschiatric wing of the hospital. They kept me locked up. They wouldn't let me see anyone, or anyone see me. They saw me as a danger to myself.  
  
They took Yani away from me. My parents watched over her, while I stayed in the hospital, not responding to anyone.  
  
Kascherm's mother, a spunky, strange little older Andalite came to see me. She did something that changed everything.  
  
She knocked everyone who tried to stop her from seeing me out of the way. Then she marched right in to my room.  
  
And I began to sob, so glad to see her.  
  
(Mathi.) I wept. (Oh, Mathi, I-)  
  
And she...slapped me! Right across the face with the flat of her tail blade!  
  
I remember looking into her face, into her angry eyes, shocked. Why would she do such a thing? Why would she do such a thing when I loved her so much, almost like my own mother?!  
  
(Mathi!) I said, rubbing my cheek with my hand.  
  
(What's wrong with you eh?)  
  
(What?)  
  
(Do you think this is what he'd want you to do?!)  
  
I sighed and groaned. (Mathi, I-)  
  
(You have a DAUGHTER. You should be ASHAMED! She is at your parent's home now, crying because she misses her Fathi and her little brother.)  
  
I wept. (But I can't do anything about that-)  
  
(And she NEEDS her MATHI!) She screamed at me.  
  
I looked at her, shocked, and my sobbing subsided. She was right.  
  
I looked down at the ground and thought, oh Kascherm! I've failed you!  
  
(You haven't failed him yet dear.) She said, as if reading my mind!  
  
I sniffed. (I...I just don't know what to do!) I wept.  
  
And to my surprise, she held me as I wept.  
  
(It's all right.)  
  
(No it is not!) I screamed.  
  
(Shhh...) She said, patting my back. (I remember when I first lost my husband.)  
  
After a while I pulled away and looked at her. Looked into her eyes.  
  
(Thank you.) I said.  
  
She smiled sadly. (What in the world for?!)  
  
I laughed sadly. (For coming here. For...for waking me up.)  
  
She smiled. (Come home, dear.)  
  
So I did.  
  
Little Yani ran into my arms when I left the hospital and arrived home at my mother-in-law's scoop. I wept, and begged little Yani to forgive me for how I'd acted. I felt so awful about it then. I still do. She cried, and said she loved me and forgave me.  
  
(I'm glad you're back, Mathi!) She had said, and I had embraced her with all the strenght of Life.  
  
We were all we had left.  
  
So we stayed at my mother-in-law's for those first few months out of the nice, safe, hospital room.  
  
My first few months of living as a widow.  
  
At age 24.  
  
At first I couldn't work. I couldn't really do anything. Then after a month of doing nothing and sitting around the scoop, thinking about Kascherm and my little Anukili all day, I got up off my rear, and went back to work. Besides, his mother nagged me nearly every day and hounded me with little hints and ideas till I finally got up and went back to work.  
  
I studied harder than ever and went from Nurse to Doctor in one year. I was determined to get my life back. Or at least, get a life to speak of, anyway.  
  
Besides, I wanted Yani to have something to be proud of.  
  
I wanted her to be happy, and to smile and laugh again.  
  
Going back to my own scoop was so hard. I remember just coming back and looking around in it. It felt so cold and empty and dusty and unused. And I just fell down in the doorway and wept, and little Yani cried with me, and begged me to go back to her Grandmother's scoop.  
  
(No, my love. This is our home, where we lived with Fathi and your little brother, and this is where we are going to live forever.) I said, with pure resolve.  
  
And I was.  
  
I was determined to do it. To make it somehow. To make Kascherm proud of me...  
  
And my little Anukili...  
  
I sat, there, in the shade of mine and Kascherm's scoop, thinking of all of this. I smiled as I realized Yani had fallen asleep on my shoulder, snuggled up next to me. Outside the day was hot an oddly bright. Almost too bright for my taste really.  
  
I was content to sleep there by my little daughter for a while.  
  
Suddenly, my thought-screen came on.  
  
(Doctor L'Ainishikaa?)  
  
(Hmm? Huh?! Oh! Hello Prince Galnuit!) I looked at Yani to see if she was still sleeping, and she was. The thought-screen had not disturbed her sleep. Honestly, nothing could really. If a bomb had gone off, that child would have still been asleep and-  
  
I winced at the thought 'bomb'. I shook my head, trying to clear awful thoughts, images, and most of all memories out of my head.  
  
(Report.) The Prince said simply. Galnuit had his usual easygoing smile on his face. He was an older andalite, with nothing to worry about, and had not had too difficult a life, from what I'd heard of. He was a rather simple fellow, and I had worked under him back when Kascherm had been alive. Though now we were partners. Really, I wouldn't rather have had anybody else but Galnuit.  
  
I sighed. It was still going to be a long day, I could see. (Very well.)  
  
***  
  
Okay. Sorry if that was long. Am tired now. Goin' to bed! Goodnightsies! Hope yall like it. *YAWN* Don't really care if you don't at this point...  
  
Love yaz! Nowgoandreview! Uwluwlubluuuh! 


	11. Inspector, Fiances, and Forgotten Loves

DISCLAIMER; I not own Animorphs. Me no speakee eeengleeesh!  
  
Me is andalite.  
  
Ha...ha..  
  
Yeah! Whoo! Story time!  
  
Dedications;  
  
Wraithlord 42, michelle, genies9, JJ, and all you other kiddies who like it so far! Read on babes!  
  
*NAT* - Don't give up on me, babe! Cassie's comin' up, though not in this chapter! Sorry! You'll just have to wait a wee bit longer, k?  
  
Alrighty! Here we goooooo!  
  
L'Aini's POV  
  
I sighed. I really, really, was not in the mood to talk about anything. I was tired, and warm, and sleepy, and lazy, and very, very comfortable.  
  
I tried to make my mind business like. (Uuuh!) I groaned in thoughtspeak.  
  
He looked worried. (L'Ainisha? Are you alright?)  
  
I sighed. (Yes! I'm fine...just...)  
  
(Do you need some more time off work?) He said, gently, genuinely concerned.  
  
(NO! No. Absolutely not.) The last thing I wanted to do was to be left to loaf around at home with nothing to do.  
  
(I'm fine.) I said again. ( I assure you Galnuit!)  
  
He sighed. (Well, alright. You only have to ask if you ever need time off you know. I'd understand L'Aini-)  
  
(I'm FINE.) I said, getting annoyed.  
  
(Alright! Alright! Goodness! Calm down!)  
  
He instantly became all business.  
  
(Now. What do you have to report?)  
  
(Well...honestly? I ah, )  
  
He looked, waiting expectantly. (Well? What?)  
  
(Well, you see Galnuit. Aximili is...He is...Well...He's...telling the truth...)  
  
He stared. (Ah ha...I see...Well.) He smiled, unsure. (Are you sure you are feeling alright, L'Aini?)  
  
I huffed. (YES!) I snapped at him. (Galnuit, it's true! I've seen it with my own eyes!)  
  
(Ah. And what exactly did you see?) He sounded skeptical now.  
  
I sighed. How was I going to explain to him? Guess what Galnuit! Ellimists are REAL! And Aximili is now going to live forever with a psychotic soul eater in his head?! And he'd probably say Let's take a trip to the mental ward, L'Aini!  
  
(Ah. Yes.) He said. (You can't explain. Well. That helps.)  
  
(Galnuit-) I began trying to explain but he cut me off.  
  
(No. No, L'Aini. Whatever sympathies, or pity you have for Prince Aximili, remember that he has been through alot. Remember that he was the ONLY one found and rescued from his ship.)  
  
I looked at him with all four eyes. (What are you implying?)  
  
He sighed. (I...I am not implying anything. There is a great deal we do not know and understand about this right now.) His expressions turned into that of concern. (Please L'Aini, please.)  
  
(What?!)  
  
(Promise me you will not believe him completely! Promise me you will always be on all four hooves, always on your guard!)  
  
I sighed. (Oh, alright! For goodness' sake!)  
  
He smiled. (Good. Now. I will just send the inspectors over and-)  
  
(INSPECTORS?!) I said, shocked. (What inspectors?!)  
  
He looked surprised, then a little suspicious at my reactions.  
  
(L'Aini. If there is something you are not telling me...)  
  
(Nooo.) I said, now very annoyed, and a little worried. Besides, even if I told him everything, he would still probably not believe me. Ah, well.  
  
He'd just have to learn to believe the hard way. Like I had. With that thought I gently touched the bruise on my face.  
  
(L'AINI?!) He yelled.  
  
(What?)  
  
(What is that?! Where did you get that?!) Oh! He had noticed me touching my face. (Wait,) He became angry and suspicious again. (Who gave you that?!!!)  
  
(N-no! Nobody! I just...clumsyness, I suppose.) I blushed and tried to smile.  
  
(Hmmm.) He said, still not entirely convinced.  
  
I almost laughed. He could be such a Fathi to me sometimes! He was really only about in his fifties. Though I suppose a Fathi of someone my age could be about that old...I don't know. He was always so overprotective of me! I smiled affectionately.  
  
(Don't worry about me, Galnuit. I can hold my own.) I said softly.  
  
He smiled. (I know little one. I just...) He smiled and blushed and looked down. He looked back up into my eyes. (Be careful. Please. I'm serious. You have no idea what kind of mental case Aximili could have become.)  
  
I sighed. (Alright!)  
  
(And anyway, if these Animorphs don't have anything to hide, they shouldn't fear the inspectors. And neither should you, for the matter of that. If Aximili is...removed from their company, it's all for the best you know. For his good and the good of others.)  
  
I smiled a little. (Yes.) I said. ( I suppose so. ) Though inside the sound of the word 'inspectors' really just made me shudder a little.  
  
Galnuit left after a few minutes longer; after he explained to me that I would need to go back this afternoon. I groaned inside. Oh, well. So much for a nice, peaceful afternoon.  
  
Hanike came on almost immediately afterward. I had gotten up, and gently laid Yani down on the floor of the scoop to sleep. I was stretching my shoulder, arm, and side that had gone numb from her weight on them, when he spoke.  
  
(Hello my love.)  
  
I turned and smiled at him.  
  
(Hello.)  
  
He smiled at me, pleased to see me.  
  
(Aren't you supposed to be working?) I teased.  
  
He smiled and blushed. (Perhaps. But I can see and talk to my fiance first, can't I?)  
  
I smiled. (Of course you can.)  
  
Yes. It was so. Hanike had asked me to marry him three months ago. It had almost been two years since Kascherm's and Anukili's deaths. I had mourned my husband. I still mourned him; crying nearly hours every night. But I felt it was time to move on. Kascherm would want me to. And I felt that Yani needed a father again.  
  
Besides, I needed someone to support my heart through this life.  
  
And Hanike was wonderful, and sweet, and loving. He was young. Poetic. Caring. With a characteristic of gentleness underlying everything else. And oh, so brilliant.  
  
I felt like a traitor sometimes when I thought of how he had been Kascherm's best friend. But Kascherm had always said to him (If anything should ever happen to me, you slug, you better take care of my babies!) We had laughed at that then. Now...  
  
Now nothing was really funny anymore.  
  
(L'Aini?)  
  
(Yes?)  
  
( I'll be on leave soon.)  
  
I beamed. He was currently stationed in space above our planet.  
  
(Wonderful.) I breathed.  
  
(I'll be with you in a week.) He said, his eyes grinning.  
  
He looked very, very happy and very relieved to be finally getting off of his ship after months and months of duty. I studied him closer and saw that he looked very tired. So washed out.  
  
(You look tired.) I spoke softly.  
  
He smiled. (I'm exhausted. I...) He blushed. (Never mind.)  
  
(What?) I said, looking at him sideways, beginning to smile.  
  
(I...I want to sleep by you. Just lie down and sleep with you.)  
  
I blushed a little. Smiled.  
  
Damn, he really knew what to say to just get me-  
  
He looked down. (I...I'm sorry. I shouldn't say that to you. I-)  
  
(It's alright.) Suddenly my voice was husky. (We'll be doing much more than that, soon enough.)  
  
He stared at me. Then blushed furiously and looked away.  
  
(I...I...you...)  
  
I smiled. I winked at him, the action I'd seen Menderash do. Both my right main eye, and my right stalk eye.  
  
He smiled, puzzled. He seemed awed by me.  
  
(You know, you're so different from every other female I've ever met.) He said softly.  
  
I smiled. (Thank you.)  
  
(No. Really. I mean it. I think that's why Kascherm was so crazy about you.)  
  
I closed my eyes, feeling a pang in my hearts.  
  
(I...I'm sorry, Ainisha, I wasn't thinking. Oh please...)  
  
I opened my eyes and looked into his sorrowful ones. (It's...it's alright.)  
  
(I...I know you still love him.) He said gently.  
  
I closed my eyes and looked down. It was true. There was no use denying it. Every time I breathed, I thought of Kascherm and breathing hurt.  
  
(It's alright.) He said. (I understand. Really.)  
  
I tried to smile. It slipped away. I cried in my hearts; a whimpering crying of fresh pain.  
  
(You'll always love him.)  
  
(Y-yes.) I wept. (I'm so sorry Hanike!)  
  
He smiled gently, sadly. (It's alright my love. And I will always love you.)  
  
He would be right about everything he said.  
  
***  
  
Tobias's POV  
  
I sighed.  
  
What was I going to say to Estrid?!  
  
Would she even want to talk to Ax? Would he even want to talk to her?  
  
Maybe I should ask him...  
  
No, he would be onto my game. How to go about doing this...  
  
I approached him as he was feeding near a little pond he liked. I was in hawk form. He was nice and calm. Or he seemed so externally, anyway. I would never have just exactly any idea of the inside.  
  
(Hey Ax man!)  
  
He smiled. He looked overjoyed that I was talking to him. Like he was glad of the distraction.  
  
(Hello Tobias.) He said softly.  
  
I felt 'beak-tied' for a few minutes. What should I say to him?!  
  
(Well. Uh...do you...uh...So what do you think of the doctor?!) I squeaked, desperate for conversation.  
  
He seemed aware that I was desparately making conversation.  
  
(Well, I don't know. She seems...nice. Rather suspicious though.)  
  
(Yeah.) Suddenly something bothered me. (Who exactly are her superiors? Did she ever mention.)  
  
(Oh, I imagine someone from the Board of Planetary Mental Health.) He said, vaguely.  
  
I laughed. Then I realized he was being very, very serious.  
  
(Uh, Ax?)  
  
He sighed. (Yes, Tobias?)  
  
(Do you...ever think of Estrid anymore?)  
  
He seemed to know that I was fishing. Or he felt it anyway.  
  
He shrugged. Laughed a little. (I don't know. I haven't really thought of her in so long. Been kind of busy lately.) He actually laughed; a true, genuine laugh.  
  
I laughed too. Mainly because it felt good to hear him laugh again. Good to know that he could still laugh, even and especially now.  
  
(Well, what do you think of her?)  
  
(I...well...she...I don't really even know her anymore.) He seemed sorrowful.  
  
(It's okay.) I said gently. (You...ever thought of getting to know her?)  
  
(What?)  
  
(I mean or, you know, getting to know any girl, really...)  
  
(Tobias, really, what is this?!)  
  
I sighed. Yep, he guessed.  
  
(I don't know. I mean, I just thought, you're getting older now. You're an adult. Why not...)  
  
(Get married?)  
  
(Well, yeah!)  
  
He laughed bitterly. (Tobias don't be so ridiculous!)  
  
I felt hurt. He noticed he'd hurt me and looked sadly at me, his laughter stopped.  
  
(Tobias, I'm sorry, I just-)  
  
(No. It's okay.) I said, bitterly. (You're right. I'm stupid.)  
  
(No. You are not, you are really not. It is very...you are concerned about me, and that's very kind of you to care, but...) He sighed sadly.  
  
(You're my Uncie Ax Man. I just want to see you happy. See you live a normal life...for an andalite, anyway.)  
  
He smiled sadly. Then shook his head and turned away from me. He walked away, and as he did, he said  
  
(No one could ever love me now, anyway. No one ever would.)  
  
And I was left with that most depressing thought, to sit by the pond with the leaves blowing in the forest wind from the trees, to contend with. 


	12. The Inspectors

DISCLAIMER: No, I didn't write animorphs, but yeah, they do ROCK!!!  
  
I wish to apologize for a serious MAJOR mess up in my previous chapters. Menderash!!! Duh, I know he's a human nothlit. I know I've been putting his words in thoughtspeak bubbles. Sorry okay?! I think 'Andalite' and before I know it, I'm thinking 'thoughtspeak' and 'stalk eyes' and 'tail' and 'tailblade'. So if you see any references to Menderash having a tail or stalk eyes, please, PleAsE, PLEASE; JUST IGNORE IT!!!  
  
Okay, now that that little misunderstanding is out of the way...  
  
Oh, one more thing!  
  
Sorry guys if the pace of this has been slow, and the chapters long. I had to clear up a great deal o' junk in the beginning with Ax, and stuff. But now, I promise you, the story is on it's way, and the love affair is just about to begin!!!  
  
Yes, L'Aini is engaged. No, don't worry.  
  
Heh heh... grins evilly. She might be engaged, but she sho' ain't married, yet!!!  
  
Heh heh heh...  
  
*Birdie num num shoots Cupid arrow.* Screw this! *Takes out dart gun, shoots Tobias's hawk body full of lovey dovey darts. His hawk form actually looks over at L'Aini and grins in a very loopy, cartoony way. Lovey music plays in the backround. Tobias sees little hearts and andalite baby cherubs with little wings floating around her and giggling. Wind blows her fur around.*  
  
Music: La laaaaa! La laa la laaa laa laaaaa! Laa laaa laaaaa laaaaaa! La laaaa laa laaa laaaa! Laa laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! (Music fades out slowly).  
  
Here we goooo!  
  
L'Aini's POV  
  
I ran to the Rachel.  
  
(I'm late, I'm late, I'm late, I'm late, I'm late!) I said, panicking.  
  
The inspectors were probably already there!  
  
Breathing raggedly, I practically dragged myself up the ramp, wheezing through my nose.  
  
(Whew! Whooo!)  
  
(Helloooo!) I called to the ship.  
  
The door immediately opened.  
  
It was Marco.  
  
"Ah, you again. Hey, I know. Maybe you can explain WHAT THE HELL THESE GUYS THINK THEY'RE DOING HERE!!!"  
  
To my shock, he grabbed my arm and pulled me inside the ship. He shoved me roughly into the room.  
  
Yes, he was definitely still in a very bad mood. Must have been that Drode thing...  
  
I glared at him indignantly. He just pointed over behind me, further into the room.  
  
I looked and saw three Andalite males.  
  
I groaned inside.  
  
The 'inspectors'!  
  
(Ah, hello!) I called, timidly.  
  
One of the inspectors, a very confident looking male that was about 10 or 20 years older than me, stared at the state of my fur. Another one behind him sneered. I felt embarrassed immediately. I had fallen asleep at home, and my fur was full of dust, and now sweat since I had been running. The third, a thin, small, nervous looking male noted my presence, then went back to looking about the ship.  
  
(Uh...Hello...?) The first one I had noticed said. He was the oldest of the group. (What are you doing here...Doctor...L'Ainishikaa?)  
  
I noted a sneer in his tone at the word 'Doctor'. I felt very annoyed now.  
  
(Yes, actually!) I said, straightening my posture. I felt the need to reassert my authority. I was a female doctor. This snooty moron could leave if he was going to be condescending. I lifted my chin upwards.  
  
The male behind him glared now. He could tell I wasn't going to be pushed around. The oldest simply smiled, in a very self-absorbed, detached way. As if he was amused at me.  
  
(What are you doing here?) I asked him.  
  
(I am doing my job...Doctor.) He hissed. (I do not feel that I owe you any explanation anyway. What are you doing here?)  
  
(I am their Doctor.) I said, reasonably.  
  
(Ah, yes.) He said, dismissing me. (Very well.) He turned to Prince Jake, who I noticed was sitting in the chair again. Prince Jake's fingers were drumming, a gesture I believed to be of impatience or annoyance. Perhaps both, I thought.  
  
(Jake.) He said. I stared, shocked. How dare he just adress him like that! Prince Jake, whether he was an andalite or not, had fought bravely in the Yeerk War. He deserved our respect. I was getting quite annoyed with this twit now.  
  
Prince Jake looked up at him, through narrowed eyes. His hands were now clasped in front of his mouth, pensively.  
  
"Yeah?" He said, lazily.  
  
(The name is Leetherin-Ullmas-Aroon.) He snapped. (You may call me Prince Leetherin and you will also-)  
  
"Really? That's funny. 'Cause I'm Jake. Prince Jake to you."  
  
Marco was smirking in the corner.  
  
Prince...nah, never mind. Leetherin's eyes widened.  
  
(I...I...) He was stunned. The other, timid andalite came forward.  
  
(Prince Jake?) He said, sounding somewhat bored.  
  
"Yep. How can I help you?"  
  
(I have spoken with Prince Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill, and I have studied his behavior. And it is quite irregular. I feel that he-)  
  
(You came here and talked to him?!) I said. This was too much! (And while I was not present? While I was not aware?)  
  
He looked at me, blinked. (Ah, good. Doctor. I would have liked for you to be here, but I suppose you were at home playing with your children-)  
  
(Where she should be!) The younger one cut in, smirking.  
  
(and I was not able to consult you.) He continued, ignoring the young fool. (Therefore, I went on without you.)  
  
(But, I-) I began to protest.  
  
(Now. I suppose you could give me your medical notes? Your observations on Aximili?)  
  
I looked down at my handsize portable computer. (Well...I...)  
  
(Ah, I see you have them there. Give them to me, please.)  
  
I stared at him, then looked down at them again. I had written them before I had seen the Drode. Before I had witnessed the Ellimist.  
  
It went something along the lines of  
  
(AXIMILI-ESGARROUTH-ISTHILL IS INSANE! HE NEEDS MEDICAL HELP IMMEDIATELY! HE ATTACKED ME! STRUCK ME ACROSS THE FACE! HE IS A DANGER TO HIMSELF, AND EVERYONE AROUND HIM!!!)  
  
I couldn't let him see this!  
  
(I...I...I don't have them.) I lied.  
  
He stared at me. Blinked again. (I will only ask this one more time. Give them over to me, Doctor.)  
  
(It...I don't have them!) I insisted. I looked over at Tobias with one stalk eye. He looked sadly at me. He was in human morph.  
  
(Didn't you hear him!) Leetherin roared. (HAND IT OVER NOW, YOU SILLY FEMALE!)  
  
I stared, shocked at his behavior.  
  
He glared at me furiously. Then his tail twitched!  
  
And knocked my computer right out of my hand!  
  
I stared, shocked. I cradled my hand, which hurt now. I stared at him. Everyone else was dead silent. Jake watched, looking someone confused, stunned.  
  
He picked it up.  
  
(Ah, here you go, Doctor Sardis.) He said, emphasizing 'Doctor'.  
  
I felt my face flush as I stood there and did nothing. I looked down, embarrassed.  
  
I noticed Marco look at me, then glaring over at Leetherin. I didn't know who he was angrier at; me for doing nothing, or Leetherin for striking at me.  
  
I felt so humiliated. And my humiliation deepened as Sardis looked through my computer!  
  
He actually accidently opened an old message from Hanike! Aaaah!  
  
(Hello, love!) His cheery voice resounded from the ship. (Just missing those bright, beautiful eyes of yours, and those lovely long legs, and that tail-) Sardis mercifully, annoyed, ended the transmission.  
  
I turned absolutely purple, my eyes squeezed shut. Marco was trying, politely, desparately, not to smirk. He gained control after a while.  
  
The young andalite smirked out loud, not bothering to hold it in.  
  
I was so glad I wasn't human! If I had been, hot tears of embarrassment would have been going down my cheeks right then.  
  
He finally accessed my comments, after going through nearly all of my personal files!  
  
I could see Tobias looking like he wanted to comfort me. I prayed to the stars that he wouldn't!  
  
That would have been the ultimate embarrassment! Right in front of Leetherin!  
  
And I felt like screaming as my comments came out. Loud. On the ship. Bouncing, echoing off the metal walls, back at me.  
  
My own, crazed, angry raging.  
  
Aximili looked sadly at me. I looked in his eyes, then looked down in shame.  
  
HE STRUCK ME! RIGHT ACROSS THE FACE!  
  
I cringed at those words.  
  
Leetherin's head whipped around suspiciously, his main eyes on Aximili. Aximili looked down in shame.  
  
Marco was glaring at me now. I kept all my eyes from looking in his.  
  
I noticed Menderash glaring at me too, shaking his head.  
  
My main eyes looked up to see both Leetherin, and Sardis looking at me. Leetherin's eyes were wide, almost smiling, as though he'd just found treasure. Sardis had narrowed eyes. As if curious as to why I would hide this...annoyed. The young male looked warily at Aximili, backing away now.  
  
Sardis shut off the recording, right in the middle of one of my sentences. He looked bored at it one last time, then tossed it carelessly to me with one hand. I fumbled and caught it, with both my hands, and the flat of my tail blade.  
  
(You DARED hide that evidence from the board-) Leetherin began; his eyes angry, wide and accusing.  
  
Sardis cut him off. (You will not hide things like that anymore from us, is that understood, Doctor?) He said, in that bored voice of his. Not commanding. Just knowing that I would agree.  
  
I slowly bobbed my eyestalks. (Yes, Doctor Sardis.) Not looking him in the eyes.  
  
My humiliation was fading now. I was mostly afraid of the Animorphs' anger now.  
  
Prince Jake was still sitting, relaxed. Aximili was looking nervously at everyone, especially the inspectors; mostly Sardis, for Sardis was the one to fear.  
  
Prince Jake was smiling slowly. Then he began to chuckle.  
  
"Hmm. Hmm hmm!" He was trying not to, but soon he was laughing.  
  
They stared at him, confused. What was he laughing about?! What could he possibly have to laugh about?!  
  
He smiled, calming down, and wiped tears from his eyes. "Whoo! Oh, me! Heh heh!" He grinned. "That was funny; when that happened." He began to chuckle again. "He knocked her absolutely over! Oh!"  
  
I felt embarrassed again. But not as awful as it had been over Sardis. This was beginning to make me smile a little.  
  
He smiled and looked apologetically at the inspectors; mainly a surprised Sardis. "I'm sorry guys! I just..." He chuckled some more.  
  
He turned and looked at me. "I'm sorry, Doctor L'Aini." He said, genuinely. I looked in his eyes and I could see he meant it. It also felt as if he was apologizing for the day as a whole. For everything that had happened to me since I first walked onto the Rachel.  
  
I couldn't help but smile at this surprisingly kind Prince. I felt as if he was my only friend in there at that moment. I smiled and blushed. (It...it's really alright...Prince Jake.) I said, emphasizing the 'Prince', and looking out the corner of my eyes at Leetherin. He was glaring, his eyes wide with disbelief. He was positively quivering with anger. Pure rage and malice.  
  
And it was hilarious to me! Why?!  
  
I smiled and shook my head at him.  
  
I swept my eyes over back to Prince Jake, and as I did, I caught Tobias's eyes. He smiled at me, the smile slowly forming into a grin.  
  
I blushed and looked down. Then looked him in the eyes and fully smiled back again.  
  
Sardis spoke, breaking the moment of peace.  
  
(The evidence here is quite plain. Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill attacked Doctor L'Anishikaa, and although why she hid this from me and the other inspectors as well is a mystery to me, I also know that I do not really care. Prince Aximili is dangerous, despite whatever your sympathetic feelings for him may be-) He said this to me, turning his main eyes to look directly at me know.  
  
I glared furiously. Oooh! How dare he suggest that there was something between me and Aximili!  
  
(-he will be much better off being taken care of.)  
  
"In a nut house." Marco finished bitterly.  
  
There was absolute dead silence while Marco and I tried to hold in our anger and Aximili looked nervously at everyone. Almost pleading.  
  
Prince Jake cleared his throat and spoke. "Well. That's...very interesting." I smiled, as I could already tell he didn't care at all. "But I don't really see what that has to do with anything."  
  
Sardis blinked a few times, confused. Very, very irritated.  
  
(Well it's quite simple, ) He spoke as if he were talking to a child. (Aximili needs to be in a mental hospital so he can be looked after and taken care of and so he won't endanger others, like he did Doctor L'Aini.)  
  
Prince Jake smiled. Almost amused at Sardis's tone.  
  
"Why do you think that?"  
  
Sardis rubbed his forehead. (Because...Aximili is disillusioned. He is convinced that he has someone in his head, living inside of him. Now, unless he is infested with a Yeerk, which I have not been informed of, I suggest you let us take him with us.) His tone was now quite dangerous.  
  
Aximili slowly began to rise on all four hooves, his eyes looking, panicked, around.  
  
My eyes went wide as I saw the young male reach for a shredder on a sling that I hadn't even noticed. Marco was standing tensely now; he had seen the young male move for his weapon too.  
  
Tension filled the air. I found it difficult to breathe almost.  
  
Prince Jake looked up at Sardis and smiled icily.  
  
"Well, I tell you what I'm going to do. You are going to get off this ship."  
  
(You've made a wise choice.) Sardis said.  
  
"Without Ax."  
  
Silence.  
  
(I beg your pardon?) He said. Leetherin's eyes were wide and he was quivering with rage again.  
  
"You have it. Now leave."  
  
Sardis blinked. He said nothing. Leetherin roared.  
  
(WHAT?! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO YOU'RE MESSING WITH?)  
  
I notice Marco smile at that.  
  
(DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHOSE PLANET YOU'RE ON?!)  
  
"As I recall," Prince Jake said, butting in. "and please, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong, but the Rachel is property of America. As in Earth."  
  
Sardis looked bored again. He sighed. Leetherin smiled superiorly.  
  
(Your ship is now on the Andalite home wo-)  
  
"Yes. My ship."  
  
I could have cheered for him right then and there.  
  
I decided I liked Prince Jake. I smiled. No, I beamed.  
  
Tobias was grinning too. He looked cockily at the 'inspectors'.  
  
"I'd love to invite you to stay for dinner." Prince Jake droned on lazily. "But I don't know if you have a human morph."  
  
The young soldier sneered. (I have a wife to get home to.) To my shock he looked at me and sent me a very lustful, depraving look.  
  
I glared back at him, then looked away, almost shivering in revulsion.  
  
Thank the STARS I wasn't his wife! Ugh! How...common!  
  
(You will regret this!) Leetherin said.  
  
Eager to avoid conflicts- and having another thing to worry about!- I stepped forward, arms out, hands up, in a gesture of supplication.  
  
(Please!) I said. (Let us avoid trouble.)  
  
(WEll!) Leetherin said, (I'm glad to see you've come to your senses!)  
  
(I was going to propose that Aximili stay here-)  
  
(WHAT?!)  
  
(-and I could continue to be his doctor and see to him every day that he is on the planet. If his condition worsens, I would consent to his immediate removal to a hospital.)  
  
Leetherin sneered. (Don't be ridiculous!)  
  
(If he gets worse.) I said slowly. (You may take him. I think that removing him from his friends and the people he trusts and obviously needs right now, may only worsen his condition.) I looked to Sardis. (Don't you think so Doctor Sardis?)  
  
Sardis blinked. (Well...I...supposed.) He half smiled and said. (Yes! Yes, why not? Well. I'm leaving now, Leetherin, if that will be all.) He sounded almost relieved.  
  
(WHAT?! That will not be all!) He raged.  
  
(Yes.) Sardis said, looking him in the eyes with his stalk eyes. (It will, Prince Leetherin.)  
  
I got the feeling that he was saying more to him privately. Leetherin's eyes fell on me, and a smile slowly spread across his face. Sardis then walked out of the room and off and out of the Rachel.  
  
Leetherin walked out as well. (Very well, Prince Jake.) He sneered on the 'Prince'. (But I warn you,) He stopped and looked Prince Jake directly in the eyes. (if this...this...mental case, leaves this ship, I will be all over him. Is that understood?)  
  
Prince Jake merely smiled. "Yes. I understand perfectly. Thank you for dropping by Prince Leetherin. Do come again."  
  
( Oh.) He smiled icily. (I will, Prince Jake. I will be most glad too.) He then looked me in the eyes. I looked back at him, steadily. (And so will Dr. Sardis.)  
  
He walked out, and as he passed by me, he looked down at me, in the eyes again and said  
  
(I warn you Dr L'Ainishikaa. If he leaves this ship, I will be all over him. He will be arrested. And so will you. You are now responsible for him.) He said this privately; to me only.  
  
I sighed and lowered my head. Damn! I knew I shouldn't have gotten involved in this. Now it would be my neck. And I had Yani to think of.  
  
I looked up and the young male walked out by me, following his prince. He looked me up and down and snickered. His tail lightly grazed my flank as he left the ship. I felt a shiver of disgust go through me. Then I tried to hold back a wave of rage. Laughing, he walked out of the Rachel, down the ramp, and into the afternoon. Out of my life.  
  
(Thank the stars.) I whispered in my head. I let go of my rage and felt sweet release.  
  
I noticed Tobias looking disgustedly after the young soldier. He smiled gently at me. An, 'are you alright?' smile.  
  
I felt itchy where his tail had stroked me. Ugh. I resisted the urge to scratch.  
  
Though the others had noticed Leetherin privately speaking to me, they hadn't noticed the soldier's caress. Except, Tobias of course.  
  
I felt like vomiting up my grass. This day was too much. I wanted to go home and sleep. Just sleep, and not be touched by anyone, or anything for the rest of the day.  
  
Except maybe, Hanike.  
  
The thought of his sweetness made me feel warm in my hearts and I couldn't help but smile. By the moons! He was so much like...  
  
I felt pain in my hearts.  
  
Like Kascherm.  
  
(No.) I said aloud.  
  
"What?" Marco said. He had been talking to Prince Jake the past few minutes. I had been zoning out and hadn't noticed them.  
  
(Nothing.) I said.  
  
The others talked furiously about what had happened. Prince Jake nodding and looking tense and worried. I looked over and saw Jean hugging Aximili gently. He was rubbing his forehead and looking tired.  
  
Tobias came over to me.  
  
"Hey." He said.  
  
(Oh. Hello.) I replied.  
  
"I was just thinking, you know. It was really generous of you to do that for Ax. Very brave."  
  
( And very stupid!) I replied, angry with myself. ( I've just thrown away my entire career!)  
  
"Why?!" He said, looking very worried and sorry now. "Are you getting fired or something?!"  
  
(What? Oh. No, no.) I sighed. (It's just that Leetherin is going to make my life a black hole if Aximili so much as breathes odd now!)  
  
"Sorry." His big, brown eyes were so sad.  
  
I felt a little strange around him now, for some reason.  
  
(It...it's alright. It's not your fault. You don't have to apologize!)  
  
"Well...I just..." He smiled. "I was just wondering, you know, how this is going to interfere with our plans."  
  
I stared at him for a few seconds, not understanding. (Our plans? What plans?)  
  
He sighed and rolled his eyes. "You know! Estrid!"  
  
(What?) Alright, now I was very, very confused!  
  
"Estrid!" He said, then lowered voice sheepishly. "You know! The certain someone from Ax's past I mentioned earlier!"  
  
(Oh!) I laughed. (Oh, yes, alright! I'm sorry, I just...) I sighed. (I'm...)  
  
(Exhausted.) He guessed.  
  
I laughed. (We've had this conversation before haven't we?)  
  
He grinned. Laughed softly. (Yeah, you're right. We have.)  
  
(Well.) I said. (I need to go.)  
  
"What about Estrid?"  
  
I sighed. (What's her full name?)  
  
He thought for a moment. "Estrid-Corrill-Darrath." He said at last and smiled at his ability to remember.  
  
I smiled too. Then it hit me. (Whoa! Wait! Is that THE Estrid-Corrill- Darrath? As in, the one who created a virus?!)  
  
He smiled, winced a little. "Yyyyeah...so?"  
  
(Hmmm.) I said. (I don't know.)  
  
"Oh please, come on! For Ax?" He looked pleadingly again with those luminous brown eyes. Oh! He had me right there. I looked over at Aximili, still sitting on the floor, looking quite suicidal. (Besides, you already said you'd do this!) Tobias said.  
  
I looked back at Tobias. His hands were still together in a gesture of supplication.  
  
(Oh, alright!)  
  
"Yesss!" He said and grinned. He moved his fists through the air, I guessed it was a gesture of victory.  
  
(But I've got other duties, and now with Aximili as my permanent patient, it's going to be even more!)  
  
"I'll help you!" He said gladly.  
  
I started to leave. He whispered. "Hey wait! Psst! Doctor!"  
  
I turned and glared at him. (What?!)  
  
"How will you find her?"  
  
I shrugged. (She's probably in the records. That should work. And if not, I'll just ask around.)  
  
He grinned. "Thanks."  
  
(You're welcome.)  
  
"No, really. I mean it. Thank you." He smiled; an almost dazzling smile- for a human, anyway.  
  
I looked into those eyes again. I felt a strange little flutter rippling through my hearts. I smiled, blushing a little.  
  
(And I mean what I say. You're very, very welcome.)  
  
And with that, blushing. I left.  
  
I would talk to him tomorrow morning. After I found something tonight. 


	13. Estrid and her Aximili II

DISCLAIMER: Je ne sui le author de les Animorphs! Je sui Birdie num num, le pervy Andalite fancier! Oh la la!  
  
Dedications-  
  
All of you who like it!  
  
Tobias's POV  
  
Man, I was so glad when she showed up the next day.  
  
She'd found Estrid!  
  
(Did you talk to her?!) I was in Andalite form. We were seated in the control room, talking in thoughtspeak, though we weren't even looking at eachother.  
  
Menderash was showing me and Ax some damaged wires. Ax was looking more tired than ever. Menderash and Ax jabbered on and on and on about Z-space and other technical wiz Andalite crap and I tried to have a conversation with L'Aini, while she pretended to be going through her medical records on her little computer.  
  
(Of course not!) She replied. (I don't even know her! I'm not going to show up at somebody's scoop that I don't even know! Besides, what would I talk to her about?!)  
  
I shrugged. (I don't know! I just figured maybe you popped by to check on her or something.)  
  
She laughed. (You make it sound like she's one of my patients!)  
  
(So tell me about her.)  
  
I watched her with one eyestalk. She actually winced.  
  
(WEll. Honestly? She was married.)  
  
I was shocked. I dropped the circuit board I was holding. It fell to the floor with a loud, metallic clatter, surprising both Ax and Menderash. They asked me if I was alright. I distractedly said 'Fine'.  
  
(Well THAT'S a piece of news! Why didn't you tell me that when you first got in here?!)  
  
She sighed. (Well...I didn't know how to break the news so...)  
  
(Oh really? Was that it? Well you certainly weren't subtle about it just now! 'She was married.') I mocked her in my head. (Hey! Wait a minute! What did you mean by 'She WAS married?!')  
  
I saw her eyes glare at me.  
  
(I'm not going to tell you now!)  
  
(What?! Hey wait! Look, I'm sorry okay? Pleeeeeaaaase tell me?!) I added in a sing song thoughtspeak voice that made her laugh (I'll make your life a black hole if you doooon't!)  
  
(Very well.) Her smiles and laughter faded. (Her husband died in battle.)  
  
(Ah.)  
  
(Like mine...) She pondered softly.  
  
(Whoa! Hold on! You were married?!) I bucked, and Ax and Menderash stared at me, until I insisted I was fine.  
  
(Well...yes...)  
  
(Oh...)  
  
Silence.  
  
(What happened?) I said gently.  
  
I saw her eyes shut tight, like she was pained. Then they opened and were full of resolve.  
  
(I don't want to talk about it.)  
  
(Okay. That's fine.) I said softly, instantly changing the subject. (So are we going to go see her?)  
  
(We? What do you mean we?)  
  
(Well you are my 'partner in crime' now aren't you?)  
  
(What?)  
  
(My accomplice!) I said. (My partner.)  
  
(Ah. Well. Yes...but-)  
  
(Good! So we go see her today, right?)  
  
(Today?! That's a bit soon!)  
  
(What's wrong? Got something better to do this afternoon?)  
  
She smiled. (Well. I don't know. Not really.)  
  
(So is there anything else I should know about Estrid?)  
  
She sighed.  
  
(Oh. No.) I said, groaning inside.  
  
(It's not that bad.) She said. (It's just...)  
  
(What? What?! What is it?!)  
  
(She has a...child. From her first marriage.)  
  
(Oh.) I remained silent for a long time.  
  
(Tobias?)  
  
(Hmm?)  
  
(Are you reconsidering going?)  
  
I thought a moment. (Mmmmm. Eeeeeh...) I resolved my mind. (Naaaah! We're going! That's that! End of discussion!)  
  
She smiled. (Good.)  
  
(So. This, child. What is it?)  
  
(A little male.)  
  
I smiled. So Ax might get a step son.  
  
(This little guy have a name?)  
  
(What?) She said, confused.  
  
I sighed, rolling my andalite eyes. Ax sent me another curious look, and Menderash just rolled his eyes.  
  
Of course, she didn't understand slang or Earth lingo. So I went Andalite vocab for her.  
  
(Does this 'little male' have a name?)  
  
(Of course!) She laughed rather condescendingly.  
  
(I know that! I meant, what IS the child's name?!)  
  
She glared at me. Then slowly a smile formed on her face.  
  
(Guess.)  
  
(What?!)  
  
(Guess!)  
  
I sighed. Girls and their games, I swear...  
  
(Uhhh...ummm...Drode?) I said, jokingly, smirking a little at my own silliness and stupidity.  
  
(No!) She said and laughed. Her laugh surprised me. I kept forgetting that she knew who the Drode was now. Rock awesome. Oh goody, I had another person to talk to about the Prune guy. Great. Just great.  
  
(Uh...Prince Jake?)  
  
She smirked. (No!)  
  
(Well what is it?!)  
  
She beamed, and from the look of that smile on her face, I knew I was going to like the name.  
  
(She named it, Aximili.)  
  
***  
  
Tobias's POV  
  
We went to see Estrid that afternoon.  
  
I felt nervous, twitching my andalite tail as we approached her scoop.  
  
(Are you absolutely, freaking sure, that this is her scoop?) I asked for what had to be the three billionth time today.  
  
(YES!) She snapped, irritated.  
  
(Okay okay! Just checking...sheesh...)  
  
(You've already 'just checked' more times than I can count! We've talked to all the other andalites around here, and they all said, 'Estrid lives over in THAT scoop, in THAT direction. They pointed with their tails, and their hands. If you're having doubts about this, you really, really shouldn't have come along!)  
  
(Oh, so I'm the one coming along. Excuse you, if I hadn't mentioned this, we wouldn't even be heading here. You are coming along with me, remember?)  
  
(Well, now I'm coming along out of curiousity...)  
  
I couldn't help but smile at her. She smiled back sheepishly, and stumbled a little.  
  
It had definitely, gotten weird.  
  
We'd spent the whole day together, watching over Ax. Finally that afternoon, he just went into his quarters and shut the door; right in our faces. We took the hint. Poor Ax, we had been following him around all day. He needed some privacy time. I imagined he was in there in human morph, eating cinnamon buns and generally having a great old time.  
  
We arrived at a small scoop. It was near the beach. The opening of the scoop faced the ocean. It was cozy looking, tucked just above the dunes, near the long grass.  
  
I smiled, no, I grinned, as I saw a little andalite boy running around near the opening of the scoop. He had a remote control in one hand, and a small toy domeship was hovering in the air above him. He was giggling happily in a little munchkin thoughtspeak voice and making it crash into the side of the scoop over and over again.  
  
The Doctor and I stopped and watched as a young female andalite, an adult, came out of the ship. She appeared to be angry, telling the little male to stop. He looked down, hugged her forelegs affectionately, and she smiled and relented. She turned to go back inside. She stopped as she saw us.  
  
I looked at her face.  
  
Yes, that was Estrid.  
  
Suddenly I was back, years ago, in the Yeerk pool on Earth, dracon beams everywhere, I was in the ship with Gonrod the Cowardly Lion, and we were picking up the animorphs. Ax pushed Estrid onto the ship, then jumped on himself. I remembered seeing them embrace for a few moments.  
  
I smiled now.  
  
I noticed that behind her, the little Andalite began to make the ship bounce furiously off the scoop over and over, again. His open thoughtspeak giggle rose up to greet us all.  
  
She peered at me, as though she couldn't quite remember. Then her eyes went wide, and she blushed furiously.  
  
Wait...how could she recognize me?  
  
Then I felt like slapping myself with my tail.  
  
Duh! I had acquired Ax, and I was using his body! She thought I was him! Oh no. It would have been better for me to have just come in human morph. Or my hawk morph.  
  
Praying to God that she wouldn't run away, I stepped toward her. She stepped back a little. Then she seemed to notice L'Aini and calmed down a little. She looked at me, and stared at me, breathless.  
  
I couldn't help but gaze at her. She had wide, almond shaped eyes, a small nose, and was very petite and thin, but curvy. She. Was. Cute. End of story.  
  
Yep. She was going to be reunited with Ax. I had to do it for him now.  
  
Oh yeah, she would brighten anyone's day.  
  
(Aximili?) She spoke very softly. (I-is that you?) I felt stunned. She had a voice like an upper class little girl's, but when I looked in her eyes, I could see and incredible look of sadness in them. And fear.  
  
(N-no. I...It's me.) I felt stupid. Me? She had no idea who me was.  
  
I almost laughed at the expression she gave. One eye brow raised skeptically.  
  
(Who's me?) That little childlike voice cooed.  
  
(Uh...) I blushed now. L'Aini was looking at me and shaking her head, smiling.  
  
(Tobias.) I said. Man, talking to her was like talking to some foreign supermodel that had been in a perfume add in some magazine. If andalites had had modeling, she would have been one.  
  
(Oh!) A smile spread across her features. So cute...so pleasant. Like a little elf...  
  
Man, did I really want her as my AUNT?  
  
(Well...) She seemed speechless. She looked at L'Aini and giggled a little. She pointed at her.  
  
(And I suppose that's Rachel? Right? You can both demorph now!)  
  
(N-no...) I felt my heart ache. Another person. Another person who didn't know Rachel was dead. Another person I would have to tell.  
  
(Rachel's dead.) I said flatly.  
  
She looked sorrowful. Embarrassed. (Oh. Oh, I'm so sorry. ) She looked down at the ground, obviously ashamed. For some reason I just wanted to go and comfort her. Cuddle her and hold her and tell her everything would be alright.  
  
(I know how that feels.) She said softly.  
  
I began to cry right then and there in my andalite hearts. I felt like I'd just connected with someone.  
  
Not like I was going to run over and snog her. Just that I felt connected to her now.  
  
I looked to my right side and saw L'Aini's eyes closed, her arms crossed over her chest. She looked like she was crying. She understood.  
  
(I...I guess we all know.) I said softly.  
  
Estrid looked up at L'Aini. (What's your name?) She said in a curiously sad way.  
  
(I am Doctor...doctor...doctor L'Ainishikaa-) She broke down.  
  
Estrid rushed to her. I felt stunned. No, she didn't run. She almost seemed to glide. She was standing two yards away from us one minute, and in the next, she was placing caring hands on L'Aini's shoulders.  
  
(Oh, are you alright. Shhh. Who did you lose?) She said, very softly.  
  
(My...my husband...and my little son...)  
  
Estrid's face seemed full of pain. (Oh...oh my...Here, come inside. Let's get out of the wind.) She looked to me and smiled. (You too, Tobias.)  
  
She led us inside the scoop.  
  
It was basically built behind a dune, so you dropped down into it. It was warm, and surprisingly large enough for us all, and snug, and sheltered from the wind.  
  
(Well!) L'Aini laughed a little, seeming embarrassed now. (This is certainly a nice little place you have!) We looked admiringly around the scoop.  
  
She beamed. (Yes. It is nice.) The little male andalite came sliding down into the scoop. He had a whee! look on his face as he did. The little dome ship fell in and slid down inside as well. He threw the control down carelessly. He stood. He smiled politely at L'Aini. His eyes got big as he noticed me. He ran to his mother, who was now seated and snuggled close to her.  
  
She smiled. (Aximili, this is Tobias.) His eyes got wider. (Remember I told you about Tobias?)  
  
I looked at the little guy. He was skinny, and his eyes looked surprisingly old for a child his age. He smiled softly, then the smile disappeared. He looked very haggard.  
  
She pulled him close. She seemed to be consoling him, in his head. He looked like he was listening. Then he looked at me and slowly smiled a little more, shyly.  
  
I loved him instantly.  
  
He was going to be my little cousin.  
  
I smiled at him. Then I turned to L'Aini. (I've got to demorph.) She bobbed her eyestalks, then, to my surprise, nodded.  
  
I demorphed. She and Estrid began to talk softly as I did; polite, open conversation.  
  
I reached hawk, and saw one of Estrid's eyestalks watching me. She smiled as I reached hawk. They continued talking. I noticed the little male andalite looking at me; fascinated, curious.  
  
I looked up at him. I hopped towards him. He stepped back surprised. Then, slowly, he moved towards me. He smiled. I let him get close to me.  
  
He got down on his stomach and sat, with his legs tucked under him, looking at me. Gazing admiringly at my wings; somewhat envious.  
  
(Wow!) He breathed. (You can fly?)  
  
I nearly laughed. (Yeah.) Man! He reminded me of...well...me! As a little kid.  
  
(Neat!) He said. He hesitated, then shrugged it off, smiled and said. (W- would you like to see my domeship?)  
  
I felt that to refuse this little boy would break his heart. Or hearts. He asked so hopefully. So pleadingly, that I felt compelled to say yes. So I did.  
  
(Okay. Sure!)  
  
He beamed and ran up out of the scoop. I followed him, hopping up. I looked to L'Aini.  
  
(Aximili's going to show me his domeship.) I said. She beamed and nodded. Estrid watched happily as I allowed the little boy to show me his domeship.  
  
He held the control and made the ship smash into the scoop over and over again.  
  
He giggled. (See?!)  
  
(Yeah!) I said. (That's really cool!) And I meant it. I had certainly never had a toy like that when I was a kid!  
  
I slowly morphed to human. He looked up at me, surprised, and stepped back, fearfully, a little.  
  
I smiled. "It's okay." Probably not a good idea. I had showed him teeth. The poor little guy looked like he was about to scream.  
  
"Here." I said. "Let me see that."  
  
He reached up and handed me the controls. I felt confused for a moment. There were no buttons.  
  
(You have to move it around.) He explained. (If you move the control down, the ship goes down. If you move it up, the ship goes up. The same with side to side, and diagonal.)  
  
I smiled. He said it so matter of factly, but not at all condescendingly. She had done a good job raising him, so far.  
  
I wondered about Estrid's past, as I made the ship do flight tricks; loops in the air, and twists and turns and upside down and all kinds of things. I make it skim over the ocean, allowing one wing to stroke the water. I grinned as I saw little Aximili jump up and down and heard him squeal and shout with excitement.  
  
(Whoa! That's incredible! I've never done THAT with it before!)  
  
I made it act drunk; wobbling through the air. Aximili nearly fell to the floor, holding his sides, helpless with giggles. I made it run into the scoop. Then it got up, swirled through the air in crazy loops, then made it land smoothly and perfectly on top of the scoop's roof.  
  
(YAY!) He screamed. He looked up at me. (WOW! That was INCREDIBLE!)  
  
I grinned and made a small bow. "Thank you. Thank you. I'll be here all week!"  
  
(REALLY?!) He said, sounding hopeful.  
  
"N-no." I laughed a little. "It's just an expression."  
  
(Oh...) He said sadly. He sounded so disappointed! I felt like my heart would break.  
  
He looked up at me, sadness in his eyes. (You're leaving and going back to Earth?) He soundled like he was about to cry.  
  
"No." I said, earnestly. "I'll be here for a while, really."  
  
(REALLY?!) He said, happy again.  
  
"Yeah." I laughed at his joy. He did a little leap in the air. (Yay!) Then he was apprehensive again. (For how long?)  
  
"Oh. Well. It'll...take some time to repair my ship-"  
  
(YOU HAVE A SHIP? I mean, A REAL SHIP?!)  
  
I laughed. "Yes. Well, it's not really my ship. It's also my friends' ship too."  
  
(The Animorphs.) He said, smiling confidently.  
  
I grinned. "Yeah. The Animorphs." Estrid had obviously kept this little guy well informed.  
  
Estrid and L'Aini came out, still talking raptly. I hadn't noticed how the time had gone by. I actually had been having fun with the little guy out here! I smiled. For the first time in a long while, I had really, really had fun. It had been a while since I could just forget about Rachel, even for a short while.  
  
And now...as I remembered her...something very strange occurred to me!  
  
It no longer hurt as much as it used to to think about her!  
  
I nearly gasped.  
  
"Wow." I said softly. Then I felt sad. I almost wanted it to hurt.  
  
But it didn't. It was almost like Rachel had reached into my heart, and knocked the grief out of it herself. I grinned with that image in my head.  
  
"Thanks Rache." I whispered, smiling. "I still miss you though." I said, feeling my smile slide away, now feeling sad. But there was still a joy, a warmth I hadn't known in a long time in my heart.  
  
Little Ax man was jumping around asking Estrid. (Mother can I please, pleeeaaase, PLEASE go see their ship?! Please, Mathi, PLEEEEAAAAASE?!) He whined.  
  
She laughed. (No no Aximili! They've got to go now. Some other day. Maybe later.)  
  
He stood and crossed his little arms and pouted. I couldn't help but laugh a little; chuckle.  
  
He was so cool.  
  
L'Aini and Estrid actually gave eachother a small, light hug with delicate Andalite arms.  
  
(Well. I'm glad you came. Both of you. ) She said, and smiled at me too. I tried not to start blubbering right then and there.  
  
"My pleasure!" I managed to squeak out. I demorphed to hawk. Then I went Andalite again.  
  
I smiled as I reached Andalite. Here we stood.  
  
Big Ax and Little Ax. Well...almost...  
  
Big Ax was going to be very, very happy. I hoped, anyway.  
  
L'Aini and I left, our eyestalks watching as Estrid stood watching us leave, her hands on her little son's shoulders, him standing next to her, waving goodbye to us with both arms. I waved my hand back as we left, nearly causing myself to collide with L'Aini. Andalite bodies aren't meant to turn around.  
  
I turned to L'Aini as we slowly, lazily galloped away; back to the Rachel.  
  
(You know what?) She said.  
  
(What?) I replied, really, genuinely curious as to what she had to say.  
  
(I'm glad we came.) She said simply. I laughed at myself. I had thought she was going to start telling me secret confessions about Estrid's life previously. But I realized, it wasn't really any of my business, and it didn't really concern me anyway. Besides, if she wanted me to know, she would tell me. And I had the rest of my life to find out.  
  
The rest of my life.  
  
I had never really thought of that phrase before now. If I had, it had been in a negative context.  
  
But now...now it held so much promise...  
  
I smiled. (Me too.)  
  
***  
  
Hope you guys liked that! I'm tired now, it's late, I'm gonna eat, take a shower, and go to sleep.  
  
Nighty nightkins! Or good morning, or good-whatever-time-of-day it is where you are!  
  
Love yaz! Now go and review, please!!! 


	14. So Ax, do you uh, still like Estrid? Jus...

DISLAIMER: blahblahblahblahI blahblahbladon't blahblahblahown blahblahblahanimorphs blahblahblahand blahblahblahI'm blahblahblahnot blahblahblahthe blahblahblahoriginal blahblahblahwriter! blahblahblaOF blahblahblahTHE blahblahblahANIMORPHS!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!  
  
Okay. Now.  
  
Dedications: Wraithlord42, Anonymous-cat, JEs, and whoever else oddly enough likes it.  
  
Here we go!  
  
Oh! Explanation for the last chappie- on the part where it says 'a young female andalite, an adult, came out the ship' , yeah... see that's supposed to be 'a young female andalite, an adult, came out of the scoop' okay? No, Estrid did not come out of the little toy domeship. That would be impossible...yeah...  
  
Anyways! Sorry if any of you got confused! Here we gooooo!  
  
Tobias's POV  
  
As I approached the door of Ax's quarters, I felt like I was going to faint.  
  
I was excited. Excited? My little raptor heart was about to explode.  
  
That evening, L'Aini and I discussed what Estrid had said, and how best to tell Ax. I considered having Ax close all of his eyes and follow us and surprise him, but L'Aini said no way.  
  
(Tobias! This is not a game!)  
  
"I know!" I had been in human morph. We had been sitting at the table. Or as best she could 'sit' anyway. "I was just thinking...you know...surprise him. Romantic and all..."  
  
She smirked. (Males. Tobias, he hasn't seen her in years! Do you think that having him open his eyes and her be right there when he's just not ready to see her will help? He might run away or something! How embarrassing would that be?) She laughed a little, though without humor.  
  
"Okay...Sorry. You're right."  
  
(We've got to do it subtly.)  
  
"Subtle." I said, thinking. "Right."  
  
(You've got to go and tell him-)  
  
"What?! Whoa-ho-hoa! Me, tell him?!"  
  
(Yes!) She replied, exasparated. (Come on! This was your idea, after all? Aren't you going to follow through? Did you think I was going to do it for you? I agreed to find her. I've done my job so far.)  
  
I sighed. "Well...I don't know...I mean...oh man...What's he going to say- how's he going to act when he finds out I've been talking to Estrid?!"  
  
(I don't know.) She said softly. (Just try to tell him IN PRIVATE, and when he's CALM.)  
  
"Okay, okay!" I said, not really listening.  
  
I decided the best recourse would be to tell him that evening, before he went to bed. I smiled. That would give him the night to sleep on it, and maybe something to look forward to if he went the next day.  
  
I laughed at myself; the idea of ME acting as a matchmaker. It was really weird.  
  
But then again, I thought to myself, I AM really weird!  
  
Oh well.  
  
So I stood before his door that evening and tapped on it with my beak.  
  
A few moments silence. Then the shuffling and clop- clopping of hooves, and the door opened. He looked around, puzzled.  
  
(Down here, Ax man.) I said. I was in hawk form.  
  
To be honest, it was probably because I felt safest in hawk form. Not physically, like Ax was a danger to me. I mean, as a hawk, I wouldn't have to worry about facial expressions. I could just tell him, directly, and get it over with.  
  
Yeah right.  
  
(Oh. Hello Tobias.) He said, and smiled.  
  
(Hey Ax. Uh...hey, can I come in?)  
  
(Well. Actually, I was going to go to sleep but-)  
  
(Well it's kind of important.)  
  
He sighed. (Oh, alright!)  
  
(Yay!) I said, and hopped in before he could change his mind.  
  
I hopped onto the bed, as he closed the door. I sat on the edge of the bed, waiting.  
  
He looked to me. (Well? What is it?)  
  
(Well, uh...do you remember how I asked you if you still liked Estrid?)  
  
He thought a moment, then nodded slowly.  
  
(Yyyyyyeeeeessss...) He raised an eyebrow. (Why?)  
  
I almost laughed at his expression.  
  
(Well...uh...) I sighed.  
  
His eyes widened.  
  
(Oh no.) He gasped.  
  
(What?) I said.  
  
(She's not on the other side of that door is she?!)  
  
I laughed. (No...no...that's not it Ax man!)  
  
He breathed out. A kind of Andalite phew!  
  
He was smiling now. (Well what is it then?)  
  
(Well...uh...uh...uh...you see Ax...Doctor L'Aini and I...)  
  
(Oh no.) His eyes were even wider this time.  
  
(-we...well...she really. She found Estrid and uh...she uh...they uh...well...We went to see her.)  
  
(WHAT?!) He screamed. (What?!) He gasped again. (What? What? What?) He kept asking like a broken record.  
  
Oh no. I thought. I've driven him over the edge. I knew I never should have done this.  
  
(Yes Ax man. It's true.)  
  
He stared at me. (Why?)  
  
(I don't know...I thought maybe...you'd...like to...you know...see her and all...) I faded into a mutter, feeling very, very stupid.  
  
He looked like anger and sadness were fighting for his face.  
  
Sadness won out. (Oh, Tobias.) He looked down.  
  
A few moments passed and I shifted from talon to talon.  
  
He looked off at the wall. (Did you talk to her?) He asked, like he was expecting a 'no' reply.  
  
(Uh, yeah. Actually we did.)  
  
(WHAT?!) He yelled, his heading turning toward me again.  
  
(uh..yeah...we did...)  
  
He turned toward me fully. (Well...what did she say?! Did she...) A smile broke over his face. (Did she say anything about me?!) He grabbed my hawk body and shook me. (What?! What did she say?! WHAT DID SHE SAY ABOUT ME DAMMIT?!)  
  
(Okay okay! Jeez! Wait a sec and I'll tell ya!) He stopped shaking me. He still held me though; his green eyes looking hopefully into mine.  
  
(Well? What did she say?) He was almost laughing now. (What?)  
  
(I don't know...I didn't talk to her...Doctor L'Aini did-)  
  
(What?!) He squeaked. (WHAT?!) He roared. (What did SHE say?!) He dropped me and looked worried. (Oh! Oh no! What did she say? She probably told Estrid I'm insane!) He whimpered.  
  
I laughed. (No Ax, she didn't.)  
  
He smiled hopefully again. (She didn't?) He squeaked.  
  
(Uh...I don't know...I mean...as far as I know she didn't...)  
  
(How don't you know?!)  
  
(Well.) I said, sheepishly. (I didn't stay with them in the scoop while they were talking. I was too busy playing with the kid to-)  
  
(WHAT?! She has a CHILD?!)  
  
(No!) I said. (No! I mean...well, yes...but-)  
  
(She has a child!) He said, glaring at me accusingly now. Then his eyes were sad again.  
  
(Is she married?) He said weakly, very softly.  
  
(No. Well...she was...)  
  
(She was? Oh no!) He groaned. (She divorced him didn't she?! She's disgraced, isn't she? Oh I could never do that to mother! She's already suffered all the family disgrace she can take! She's got to have SOME normalcy from her offspring!)  
  
(No Ax, that's not it. He...died.)  
  
(Oh...) He calmed down. A smile slowly spread over his features. (And she's not engaged, either?)  
  
(No.) I said, feeling excited now.  
  
I could see the hope growing in his eyes. Man, this was actually happening!  
  
(Well...what DID she say about me?)  
  
(Well, she...I don't know...I mean...like I said. Doctor L'Aini talked to her, so I can't really say.  
  
(But does she want so see me?!) He cried.  
  
(Well. Yes. L'Aini and I talked about what she'd said earlier this evening and L'Aini told me she wants to see you.)  
  
Ax wasn't listening anymore. He had zoned out and started gazing off, lovingly into space at the word 'Yes.'  
  
(Oh.) He breathed. (She wants to see me...)  
  
If I had been human or andalite I would have smiled at the look on his face. Of course, if I had been human, I probably would have cried tears of joy. He looked so happy. So at peace.  
  
He looked at me. (Oh Tobias. Thank you.) He said, and smiled. Then he grew serious. He stood up.  
  
(I...I can't see her! It's ridiculous!)  
  
I felt like screaming.  
  
(Why...the HELL...not?)  
  
(I...don't be ridiculous Tobias, I just can't!)  
  
(Why not?! She wants to see YOU!)  
  
He sighed. He tried to speak, but couldn't. He just stood there, looking sadly, desparately, at the floor.  
  
(Ax.) I said, very softly this time. (Do you want to see Estrid.)  
  
(N-no...I mean.) He sighed, his shoulders sagged, and he gave in to the inevitable.  
  
(Yes.) He said softly. Then he groaned it. (Y-Y-Yes! Yes, I want to see her!) He looked up at me.  
  
(Where does she...where does she live?)  
  
I would have smiled if I could have. (I'll take you there. We'll take you there. Doctor L'Aini and I.)  
  
(When?) He said; almost seeming unable to breathe. (When?)  
  
(Tomorrow.) I said. (If you want...that is...)  
  
He smiled. (If I WANT?!) He began to laugh. (Tobias, you don't even to have to ask!)  
  
(Okay.) I said simply, though I felt like vaulting into the air and doing whirlys and loops all over the room.  
  
I flew off the bed and landed gracefully near the door.  
  
(Well.) I said. (I'm gonna let you sleep on this tonight and uh...if you decide to...you know, change your mind...) I teased, knowing full well he wouldn't.  
  
He smiled sardonically at me and shook his head. He knew full well that I knew full well that he wouldn't change his mind, and he knew it too!  
  
He walked over and opened the door. He seemed kind of nervous, and shy, and fidgety now.  
  
I hopped out into the hallway. He looked out at me.  
  
(I...I can't wait!) He confessed, breathless. He was breathing irregularly; his chest heaving with nervousness and passion.  
  
I felt like laughing with the cockiness of success at my matchmaking.  
  
I was the Matchmake Master...oh yeah, baby!  
  
(Don't worry, Ax man. It won't be too long now.)  
  
(It's been years.) He breathed. (I can stand...I can last one more night...) He said, smiling, as he shut the door slowly.  
  
(Good luck.) I chuckled.  
  
(Goodnight Tobias.) He said, dreamily, as he shut the door.  
  
(Goodnight Ax man.) I said, laughing and singing in my head, as I cockily strutted down the hall.  
  
Ooooh yessss-ah!  
  
Smooooth with a capital SMOOO, baby. SMOOOOth-ah!  
  
***  
  
Explanation for severe lack of Cassie.  
  
I'M SORRY!!! Don't worry, she's coming! Probably in the next chapter! (The one I'm working on right now! ;) ) So don't worry! :) 


	15. Cassie, a very confused Ronnie, and a vi...

DIC- heheheheheh! sorry. DISCLAIMER: I do not own animorphssh! I have a lishp! I am we-todd-did!  
  
Okay, sorry I kept you guys waiting! And heeeere weeeee gooooo!  
  
AAAAH! Wait! Dedications! NOOOO! No time for dedications! I hereby dedicate this to Martha Stewart! Yep. There we go! weee! Dedications make us feel warm and cozy inside! WHOOO! Go Martha! Go jailbird!  
  
NOW THAT'S LIVING!  
  
Sorry.  
  
L'Aini's POV  
  
I met the human Cassie the next day. The Animorphs had managed to get a transmission to her. Aximili and Menderash helped to perfect it. They made what Prince Jake dubbed the "Cassie Hotline"- a communication channel directly to what Tobias told me was a thing called a 'webcam' attached to Cassie's computer.  
  
(We do have those, you know.) I said to Tobias. (We're not oh so primitive!)  
  
(Well.) Tobias said and smiled. (You acted like you didn't know.)  
  
He was in andalite morph, and we were getting ready to run over to Estrid's home.  
  
I had learned so much in the hour I had sat with her!  
  
She had had such a hard life since the death of her first husband.  
  
He had been a warrior, Ellapsim-Urunth-Alksbet. A Prince. He had been convicted and imprisoned for mutinying against, then killing his War Prince, who had ordered him to kill a young andalite believed to be infested. Ellapsim had been in prison for nearly a year, when Estrid arrived back at the planet.  
  
For stealing a ship, and not to mention her attempt at destroying a people with a virus, she had been imprisoned for what was to be a term of nearly ten years or more. In the prison, she had faced all kinds of things. She would not tell me of them. I understood, and did not ask.  
  
It was a maximum penalty prison, so only Andalites who had done things considered to be worst acts of crime were sent there. There was no real age limit during the war, and little deferentiation between sexes, so a female prisoner could end up in the midst of a hundred male prisoners. The military was too busy dealing with the Yeerks to care for the welfare of useless prisoners. Most of the time, the prisoners were left out on a field with a huge, domelike shield over it, impossible to break out of, to fend for themselves, unless they were placed in solitary confinement, or executed. They pretty much grouped together, set up odd leaders here and there, and ran wild.  
  
But Ellapsim was feared by the other prisoners, so none of them bothered him. One night, Estrid asked Ellapsim if she could sleep by him, for safety. He reluctantly agreed after she begged him for several minutes. From then on, she slept by him, and he kept her safe. He got placed in solitary confinement once for beating the daylights out of three males, nearly killing two, when they tried to rape her. They all stayed away from her while he was in solitary confinement though, for fear of what he might do when he got out.  
  
Ellapsim's case went to trial again, and he was freed. But he had not forgotten the little female aristh who had been imprisoned, he believed, wrongly. He took her case to trial, and by pulling a few strings (and, ahem, using the help of very, powerful friends!), managed to get Estrid out. Her family took her back. But her parents begged Ellapsim that in exchange for freeing her, that he would marry her! He initially said no. But they insisted that they would accept no one else as her husband.  
  
Estrid told me that by this time, she had given up on Aximili. Her life in prison had made her feel that Aximili was 'just a childhood crush', and nothing more. And she didn't even know whether he was still alive, or not. Besides, she had fallen in love with Ellapsim, though he was several years older than her. And so they were married, when Estrid was only 13, nearing 14. Years later, at age 19, she had her little son, and her husband never objected to her naming it 'Aximili'.  
  
Little Aximili thrived, and Ellapsim got back his prince status. He went back to the military, coming on leave only once every few months. He was injured once and to Estrid's delight stayed home for a year. He went back again, coming home on leave, once again, every few months.  
  
Then, his ship was destroyed.  
  
His brother, Alkez-Inithsh-Askbat, heard of his death and the widow he'd left behind, and feeling it his family duty to support her, and keep the family honor, married Estrid.  
  
Estrid went silent after that. She then mumbled something about him being killed in an encounter with some Visser's blade ship, but she seemed like she didn't really care. It seemed as if it were her favorite part of the story. He must have been awful. She wouldn't say anything else about him. I could see pain in her eyes though. It must have been a desparate situation for her to marry him. Poor thing.  
  
I had gone home that night to wrap my arms around my Yani, and feel thankful that my Kascherm had been my only husband, and had been the sweetest male I'd ever met. Then Hanike had showed up on my thoughtscreen and begged an audience with me. (You're never in anymore.) He whined. (I miss you.) I smiled. He was such a big baby!  
  
(I'm lonely.) He'd said.  
  
(I know.) I had smiled.  
  
(I want to be with you.) He said with a sigh.  
  
(Well you're going on leave soon.)  
  
He pouted. (It's not soon enough!)  
  
I smiled now, thinking of our conversation last night.  
  
Prince Jake was fiddling with some wires. Last minute adjustments.  
  
"Okay! Here goes!" He sounded very excited. He moved over.  
  
"Menderash? Do your thing!"  
  
Menderash sat, typed a little, and the screen switched to a picture of someone's face. It was a male human. He looked very puzzled.  
  
"Okay...that's Ronnie." Prince Jake said.  
  
Menderash and 'Ronnie' stared at eachother a while.  
  
"Uh...I was uh...talking to my friend and-"  
  
"Yes." Menderash said. "This is the Rachel."  
  
He stared a little more. Suddenly his eyes widened. "Oh! Oooh! You want to speak to Cassie then, right?!"  
  
"Ah, yes. That would be Cassie, yes."  
  
The human Ronnie got up. He shouted something that sounded like "CASSIE BABY! UH, THERE'S SOME...PEOPLE. THEY'RE UH...ON THE WEBCAM! THEY WANT TO TALK TO YOU!"  
  
"Yeah sweetie, people normally come on the webcam!" Was a teasing reply. "That's kind of what it's for!"  
  
He rolled his eyes, exasparated, and Marco smirked a little.  
  
"JUST COME HERE!"  
  
She did, she peered into the screen. "Who is it?" She asked Ronnie. I saw Prince Jake suck in his breath.  
  
"They say they're on the Rachel."  
  
She sat down immediately in front of the screen.  
  
She stared at Menderash.  
  
He stared back.  
  
"WELL?" She screamed hysterically at Menderash. He stared more, his eyes wide, his body leaning back now, as if her screaming had blasted him backwards in his seat.  
  
"ARE THEY OKAY?! ARE THEY ALIVE?!" She screamed.  
  
Prince Jake shoved Menderash off the seat. He landed on the floor with a yelp.  
  
"HI CASSIE!" He squeaked oddly at the top of his vocal range.  
  
She grinned slowly. "Jake!" She exhaled, and put one hand on her chest. "You're alive." She sounded relieved, to say the least.  
  
"Yep. We all are, Cassie." He said proudly.  
  
"You're...you're all there?!"  
  
"Yep!" He broadened the view so Cassie could see all of us leaning around the view screen.  
  
"Oh!" She laughed a little. "Oh my!" She reaimed her camera.  
  
It showed the view of a dining area, and a kitchen.  
  
Ronnie was sitting in the backround, blinking comically. He looked as if he didn't know quite what to say.  
  
"Wow." She giggled nervously. Then she said. "Oh Marco! Hi! And TOBIAS!" She squealed. "Hi! It's so good to see you all alive!" She wiped at her eyes, which had become strangely moist.  
  
"Uh, Cassie? This is Jeanne, and this is Santorelli," Prince Jake began to introduce everyone. "And here's Ax man-"  
  
"Ooooh! Oh! You guys...you rescued him! Oh, wow! Hey Ax!" She called, her voice full of delight and joy.  
  
"Uh, yeah. We...rescued him..." Prince Jake said lamely. "Oh, and uh, this is Menderash."  
  
"Hello!" She looked at me. "Who's that?" She smiled at me.  
  
"Oh! Sorry!" Prince Jake blushed. "She uh, this is Ax's doctor. Cassie, this is Doctor...uh..."  
  
(L'Ainishikaa.) I said with a sigh. (You may call me Doctor L'Aini.)  
  
"Oh. Well. Hello!" Then she looked puzzled. "Ax's doctor?"  
  
Aximili winced.  
  
"Uh, that's...kind of a long, long, story..." Prince Jake said. I had the feeling he would explain later, most likely right after we left.  
  
(Well.) Tobias said, looking at the clock. (You can tell Cassie, cuz we have to go!) He grinned at Cassie. (Ax has a date!)  
  
"Oh! Man! Well." She grinned and winked at him. "Go Ax!"  
  
He blushed. (Thank you Cassie. Though I must say, it's really just a visit- )  
  
"Who's the lucky girl?!"  
  
(Oh...um...Estrid.)  
  
"Oh! You found her?" Cassie grinned. "Well that's wonderful Ax!"  
  
He smiled, blushing, and looked down. He was fidgeting nervously. He was ready to go!  
  
"Well, will I get to talk to you guys again?!" Cassie cried.  
  
"Oh! Yeah, sure!" He turned to Aximili and Menderash. "We'll still be able to access this anytime right?!"  
  
(Oh, yes! Absolutely!) Aximili replied. (You just press that...and that...there...) He showed Prince Jake. (And a box will pop up, and you type 'Cassie' in it. It will have to be in either Andalite, Yeerk, or Galard, of course. Here, Menderash will show you.)  
  
Menderash showed Prince Jake what to do. Then he and Cassie continued talking. The others gathered around, pulling seats up to the computer.  
  
We all bid farewell to Cassie for the time, then began to leave. As we were leaving, I heard Prince Jake say  
  
"Hey Menderash! Think we can move it to the big screen in the control room?!"  
  
I heard the human Cassie laugh.  
  
***  
  
Tobias's POV  
  
We galloped to Estrid's scoop; three andalites, side by side. Ax was silent most of the way, nervous, I assumed.  
  
When we got there, Estrid was already standing outside, by the scoop. L'Aini told me that she had told Estrid we would come in the morning if she wanted. Estrid had said. (Yes! Absolutely! Please do!)  
  
I looked to Ax now. His face was shocked.  
  
Oh yeah, he was pleased.  
  
She blushed furiously, and looked down.  
  
I tried not to smile. Man! This was so akward!  
  
I slowly turned to look at L'Aini. I caught her eye and we both slowly broke into grins. I tried desperately hard not to laugh.  
  
I felt like singing "You are my shining star." or something equally cheesy just to irk Ax, in private thoughtspeak.  
  
She looked up at him.  
  
(Aximili?) She said, very softly.  
  
He looked like all three of his hearts were going to stop, right then and there.  
  
(Yes. I...Hello Estrid.)  
  
Silence.  
  
(I'm very glad you came.) She said, slowly, hesitantly.  
  
(And I am glad as well.)  
  
An even more long, drawn out silence.  
  
(Well!) L'Aini said, breaking it. It was making her nervous! It was making me nervous too! My heavily furred andalite body was getting all sweaty. I decided to demorph.  
  
I reached hawk, and nearly screamed in fright as two little andalite arms scooped me up! I calmed down.  
  
It was Lil' Ax-man. He giggled in thoughtspeak.  
  
(TOBIAS! Can I go see your ship now?!)  
  
(Uh...well...you see...) I looked up and noticed Ax's stalk eyes watching Lil' Ax. I saw Estrid look nervously at Big Ax, then Lil' Ax. Back and forth between them. Ax's main eyes turned to look at the little andalite, holding me like a baby in his arms.  
  
(Aximili?) I said. (I want you to meet my uncle, Aximili.)  
  
He stared. He actually dropped me.  
  
(THE Aximili?! THE PRINCE Aximili?!)  
  
(Yep.)  
  
He looked at me, then at Ax. (The same one who fought the Yeerks on planet Earth?!)  
  
(The very same one.) I said, brightly.  
  
(The...the one who fought alongside the ANIMORPHS?!)  
  
(He sure did.)  
  
(THE ONE WHO-)  
  
(Aximili, dear!) Estrid said. Ax turned to look at her. Then he realized she was talking to the little guy, who now looked like he was going to hyperventilate from excitement.  
  
(I think that we can be quite sure that he's the same Prince Aximili.)  
  
The little andalite blushed. He looked to me. (Do...do you want to play domeship again?) He said, shyly.  
  
(Sure!) I said. I looked at L'Aini.  
  
(Why don't you come and play domeship with us?!) I said, pronouncing every syllable in open thoughtspeak. In private I said, (Come on! It's a perfect excuse to leave these two lovebirds alone!)  
  
She smiled. (I would LOVE to see Aximili's domeship.) She winked at Big Ax, then followed me and Lil' Ax to the scoop. Estrid looked about to protest, but she gave in and her shoulders sagged a little.  
  
Snickering privately in our heads, L'Aini and I went with Lil' Ax, as he stopped by the scoop to pick up his domeship and control, and then led us to an open area on the beach.  
  
We played with the little andalite for a while. The doctor giggled as she tried the domeship.  
  
(I suppose you've never tried this before?) I asked.  
  
(Well, no actually. My son Anukili has one.) She stopped, her eyes stared blankly into space suddenly, the smile disappeared from her face. She put the control in my hands. (Had one.) She corrected herself. She looked away, and at the ground, blinking rapidly, and wouldn't look me in the eyes.  
  
My heart truly ached for her. She would never go home to see that little andalite fly his little toy domeship again.  
  
I continued playing with the little guy. She merely stood on a dune, arms crossed, pretending to watch the waves, her blazing, jungle green eyes, squinted against the wind. She was very quiet, and solemn the rest of the time.  
  
I demorphed to hawk after about an hour and a half of playing with the domeship, then walking with Lil' Ax, along the beach, talking about different stuff; L'Aini walking a few steps behind us, looking at the sea horizon and the ground, quietly, sorrowfully.  
  
I flew back to the scoop, and L'Aini ran alongside Lil' Ax back to the scoop. I got there first. I landed in the sand, near the opening, and I saw Ax and Estrid sitting close, talking intently in private thoughtspeak; Ax smiling, and nodding periodically, or shaking his head the slightest bit, and Estrid bobbing her eyestalks and smiling, and moving her small, delicate hands about, expressively. They noticed me, and blushed.  
  
(Hello, Tobias.) Ax, said softly. There was a peace there I hadn't seen before, deep in his eyes. Man! He looked years younger, almost like an aristh again, and he had a contented smile set deep into his face. Estrid was looking full of life, and even more beautiful because for the first time since I'd first seen her the other day, her eyes were full of merriment and joy, and there was an odd spark in them. Her face was contorted into a pleasant smile.  
  
Ax looked grateful to me. I looked at them both and nearly cried. They looked so happy together.  
  
I thought of Rachel again. How happy I'd been with her.  
  
And even as I thought of that, I thought of my ship full of friends, and I didn't feel so bad. I felt almost glad I had lived, even though she hadn't.  
  
(Hey Ax man! Did you guys have a good talk?)  
  
They looked at eachother and blushed. Then they both turned their heads to smile at me.  
  
(Yes, we did.) Ax said, softly.  
  
We stayed nearly the whole day.  
  
At last it was late afternoon, and we all went back. L'Aini was shocked when she saw how late it was.  
  
(We spent the whole day here!) She cried out. She turned to Estrid and said apologetically. (Not that I didn't enjoy it, that is! It was wonderful! It's just that I've left my daughter alone all day and I've got to get home and-)  
  
(Oh, it's quite alright! I understand!) Estrid replied.  
  
I had really enjoyed myself. I was kind of sad that we had to leave.  
  
We galloped toward the Rachel. I insisted escorting the doc home first. Ax went with me. There seemed to be a new spring in his step.  
  
Suddenly something occurred to me.  
  
(Ax!)  
  
(Yes Tobias?) Ax said, still calm and relaxed of the Estrid vibe.  
  
(Did you...you know...tell Estrid about...well...you know?)  
  
(Well, yes, I did actually. It was the strangest thing! It was like she wasn't even repulsed or disgusted at all!)  
  
I saw a very, very guilty look on L'Aini's face. Ax noticed it too, and the prolonged, akward silence between the doctor and I.  
  
He looked at L'Aini questioningly.  
  
(Honestly?) She said, her face wincing. She then sighed, and looked down. (I told her...I told her yesterday...)  
  
(Oh. Well.) Ax blushed, looked a little annoyed, but overall fine. (I suppose that's alright. I mean, it's just as well.) He smiled.  
  
(...that you had multiple personality disorder.) She finished, wincing, again, and shrinking from him now.  
  
(WHAT?!) He said, shocked. (You told her...I...) He shook his head, anger in his eyes. (I can't believe this!) He looked accusingly at me. (Did YOU know about this Tobias?!)  
  
(Huh? Me?! No! No way! I told you, I wasn't there, when they had the conversation!)  
  
He glared at me. (Well! You SHOULD have been!) He glared at us for a few more moments.  
  
Then he just started to laugh.  
  
(W-what is it?) I asked, almost thinking the One had gotten control again. I saw L'Aini tensen and shrink from Ax, her eyes wide and watching his face, her stalk eyes glued to his tail, her own tail up and twitching.  
  
He smiled and said nothing, shaking his head for a few seconds.  
  
Then he said, (Oh, me! I don't even know why I care anymore! Multiple personality disorder!) He began to laugh again.  
  
(I'm really sorry Ax man.) I said, softly. L'Aini nodded.  
  
He smiled and shook his head. (Do you know what, Tobias? It doesn't even matter anymore.)  
  
L'Aini smiled, as if mystified by his. She asked very simply,  
  
(Why?!)  
  
He grinned a dozy, loopy, dreamy grin, and all four of his eyes stared up into the stars that were beginning to come out, and display themselves fully.  
  
(Because she loves me.) He said softly. 


	16. Proposal by the Sea

DISCLAIMER: I do not own animorphs. Blah blah blah.  
  
Okay, cut the crap!  
  
I'd like to dedicate this chapter to the biggest To Love Again fans- Wraithlord 42, and Anonymous-cat.  
  
Also to all you kiddies out there who likes it!  
  
Oh yeah! Another chappie! Heeeere weee goooo!  
  
L'Aini's POV  
  
The next morning, I was talking to Hanike on the thoughtscreen.  
  
(Hello my love!) He grinned. (Well, it's getting closer!)  
  
I laughed. (You're getting desperate.)  
  
He blushed. (WEll! It's boring on this ship! No action at all! We're just floating around in space, waiting for the war to end. It's still intense at the Yeerk's Home World, I hear.)  
  
(Well, you'll be home soon!)  
  
(Sooner than you think.) He looked sneaky to me.  
  
(Is there something you know, that I don't?) I said.  
  
He grinned. (Maybe...) He said, slyly.  
  
I grinned back. (What!)  
  
He laughed. (I have a surprise for you.)  
  
(What?!) I said, laughing a little now, excited.  
  
(I'm coming home early!) He shouted joyfully, laughing and sticking his arms in the air.  
  
(Oh! Hanike! Oh that's wonderful!) I said, and suddenly my day seemed like it would be perfect.  
  
(Yes.) He said softly. He gazed at me. (It truly is wonderful.)  
  
I giggled, like a child. Then I blushed.  
  
He laughed. (I love your laugh.) He said gently.  
  
I blushed further. Then I looked at him out of the corner of my eye.  
  
(I love YOU.)  
  
(I love you too.) He sighed. (You're perfect for me.)  
  
(So are you.) I replied.  
  
I realized it was time for me to go. I had to accompany Aximili; he was going to see Estrid again!  
  
(I've got to go, my love.)  
  
He looked sad. (Already?) He whined. (Why now?)  
  
(Aximili is going to see Estrid again.) I had explained to him earlier about my 'patient'.  
  
He laughed. (She's lovely then?)  
  
I smiled. (I guess he thinks so.)  
  
She was lovely. I felt rather plain next to her. I was short, perhaps a little taller than her, though. I wasn't exactly petite like her, though. I was a little plump. I was built; I had muscles, but not alot. To say the least, I had borne two children. I wasn't exactly the best looking female around anymore. Not that I had ever been!  
  
I suppose Kascherm thought I was gorgeous.He used to shower me with (You are so unbelievably fine.) every morning. And (I can't believe I'm married to you; you're beautiful, AND sane! Hanike said I was at every opportunity.  
  
(You're lovely.) He said, breaking into my thoughts.  
  
See what I mean.  
  
I smiled. (You're very sweet. And very, very handsome.)  
  
(You're sweeter.) He said softly. He was looking me up and down again, dreamily.  
  
I laughed.  
  
(What?)  
  
(You look so homesick. Poor child.)  
  
He pretended to pout. (I am not a child. I am a Prince.)  
  
(Yes you are.) I said, smiling. (That doesn't mean I can't take you down a notch or two though.)  
  
He laughed. (I know.)  
  
(I'm getting late! I've got to go! I love you.)  
  
He sighed sadly. (I love you too. See you later, then.)  
  
(Yes. See you-)  
  
(Tonight.) He said and grinned mischievously again.  
  
(You're playing with me!) I cried.  
  
(No.) He grinned even wider.  
  
(OH! I can't believe it!)  
  
He laughed. (See you tonight, my love.)  
  
(Yes.) I said, suddenly giddy. (Tonight, then.)  
  
(No, actually this afternoon.)  
  
I stared at him.  
  
He laughed. (I'm just joking! Tonight!)  
  
Tobias's POV  
  
When I had gotten back the night before, Jake, Menderash, and Santorelli were sitting in actual lawn chairs, and Jeanne and Marco were actually reclining on blankets in front of them, and talking with Cassie on the large screen. Ronnie was talking too, and chewing on a slice of a veggie pizza Cassie had apparently ordered. I hung out and talked a while longer. Cassie said she was doing great. Just sad; missing us. Jake seemed really shy around Cassie. And of course, Ronnie and Jake were akward around eachother. But they were having a pretty good conversation all around.  
  
This morning, as we headed back to Estrid's scoop with L'Aini, Ax was more excited; all jittery.  
  
We got there and this time, we sat in the scoop and all talked. Little Ax said goodbye to his mother, then ran to school. He smiled at me and L'Aini as he passed us by.  
  
Estrid and Ax were blushing around eachother alot. I had the feeling that there was something going on beyond what I could see. They smiled at eachother mysteriously. Suddenly, Ax asked Estrid and the rest of us to come out on the beach. Her face flushed and she said. (Y-yes.)  
  
We followed them, puzzled. Ax was holding Estrid's hand and pulling her along.  
  
We reached the soft sand. Then the shore. The wind blew sea smell into our faces. I was in andalite morph. We stood in the shallows; the water running up, then back. I stood with L'Aini, our backs to the sea and watched...  
  
as Ax got down on his stomach...  
  
and he took hold of Estrid's tail blade...  
  
and put it to his throat...  
  
I momentarily panicked. What was he doing?!  
  
And then he asked the question.  
  
(Estrid, will you...will you be my wife?)  
  
She smiled, her face blushing beautifully again. Her eyes blinked rapidly.  
  
(O...okay! Yes! Sure!)  
  
She sounded like she was saying yes to going to see a movie with him or something!  
  
Yep. There was definitely something there that I didn't know about.  
  
I looked at L'Aini. She looked as surprised as I was.  
  
We turned to look at them and my hearts swelled. They were embracing now, standing on the gray sand, the pink sky behind them, the wind blowing, and the water swirling around their legs.  
  
I looked at L'Aini. If she had been a human, she would have been tearing up.  
  
I held her hand as her torso bended forward and she began to cry.  
  
(It's okay.) I said, gently. She was probably thinking about her husband again. Poor L'Aini.  
  
L'Aini's POV  
  
I looked into his eyes. Those large green eyes of Aximili's staring into mine.  
  
I blushed and looked down. He gently cuddled me close. The ocean roared behind us, and his warm torso leaned it to shelter me from the wind. The sea water swirled about my legs gentlly; washing forward, then sucking backward into the sea.  
  
A little embarrassed, I pulled away gently. (I...thank you...). We turned to leave.  
  
(Well.) Tobias said and grinned. He walked, holding my hand, and led me away from the water. (We've got a great deal of people to tell!)  
  
Estrid looked nervous. I wondered. Had she told her parents about this?! What about little Aximili?!  
  
Tobias gently released my hand, and demorphed to hawk. He flapped and soared up above us. (Come on!) He yelled.  
  
(Tobias!) Aximili called out to him, protesting. (I...I'm not ready to tell my parents yet!)  
  
(I meant the Animorphs!) Tobias called back, gleefully.  
  
I smiled. Oh brother! This was going to be interesting!  
  
Tobias's POV  
  
We got to the Rachel. Once again, everybody was camped out around the computer for 'Cassie Time'. It was probably about 6:00 pm on Earth- right when Cass and Ron would be back from work.  
  
"The Ronnie and Cassie shooooow!" Marco sang to the tune of 'the Itchy and Scratchy Show' on the 'Simpsons'.  
  
I laughed.  
  
"Hey man!" Marco said. "You're just in time! We's be about to tune in! And you brought le Doctor! And...hey! Estrid?!"  
  
She blushed. (H-hello...Marco, I believe?)  
  
He pretended to look hurt. "You don't remember MY name?! You remember TOBIAS'S name, but you don't remember MINE?!"  
  
I felt like rolling my hawk eyes, but that was impossible. I tried anyway. It worked very oddly.  
  
Marco stared at me. "Okay, Bird man!" He turned and yelled to Jake.  
  
"JAKE! Got a SURPRISE FOR YOU!"  
  
Jake came over from the Cassie screen. "Hey! Wait...Estrid, right?!"  
  
She smiled shyly. (Hello, Prince Jake.)  
  
"What's up?" He nodded to her.  
  
We told him, or Ax told him and we kept butting in excitedly. Soon everyone else was called over and we were all laughing and talking, and excited, and Marco was making stupid jokes, and Cassie was smiling for Ax on the screen and telling him congrats...  
  
It was the best night in a long, long time. Ax looked happy, and almost finally at peace.  
  
For the time, anyway.  
  
Poor Ax.  
  
Marco came over to me and grinned.  
  
"Hey! You know what this means right?!"  
  
(Oh man. What?)  
  
"PARTAAAAYYYYYYY! WHOOOOO!"  
  
"Oh no." Jake said, in a joking tone, and grinned.  
  
Okays! I finally updated! Sorry you guys had to wait a while! Been having writer's block! Thanks for all your reviews! It's great so far! I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! Don't worry; there will be more! 


	17. The Wedding Day!

Sorry I haven't written in a while!  
  
My internet has NOT been working, and it's been so...so...sad...  
  
Anyway, heeeere's Tobias!  
  
Tobias's POV  
  
The wedding was pretty a simple affair. They had it three days later.  
  
They seemed very, very impatient. Or Ax did anyway. Hmm...  
  
L'Aini showed up. She brought her daughter with her. Her fiance was there too. I felt kind of weird around him.  
  
After all, I did secretly kind of like his fiance. But it was just a crush after all...just a little tidbit of affection...yeah....must be...  
  
I couldn't take my eyes off Ax and Estrid. They seemed so...happy!  
  
Dolphin happy. And maybe it sounds funny, but dog happy too!  
  
They had marital officials come. Yep. Apparently they have those on the Andalite home world.  
  
(My people like to keep things very well recorded.) Ax explained to me as one official proceeded to film us. Another one was a pretty tetchy guy. Then there was the Leading marital official.  
  
"So what?" I said. I was in human morph. "You're going to be in history?"  
  
(Pretty much. All marriages must be recorded with absolute detail so that no bigamy can take place.)  
  
Marco, standing nearby, grinned. "There are andalites who actually try that? Heh heh heh..."  
  
Ax smiled patiently. (They will use the data in court in the case of bigamy or polygamy occuring. They will also be around for about three hours, just to make sure that neither Estrid nor myself demorph and turn out to be someone else.)  
  
I busted out laughing. So did the others. Ax just smiled.  
  
(They've actually had cases of that happening?) I said, still laughing pretty hard.  
  
He grinned and raised one eyebrow. (You'd be surprised.)  
  
"Hoo boy!" Marco said, and laughed. He went off inside the Rachel to get more balloons. Despite the fact that Estrid politely declined at the idea of an after party, Marco insisted. He had dubbed himself Director of Party Stuff. Jake and I were Co-Directors. Jeanne was helping with the decorations.  
  
I turned to Ax and grinned. "You excited?"  
  
He smiled. "Well...of course..."  
  
Estrid and Ax just hung out together. I decided I rather liked the way Andalites did the whole wedding thing. There was no cake (in a traditional andalite wedding, but we'd make a Cinnabon flavored cake and Jeanne made two little andalites to stick on the top from blue icing! Menderash kept trying to eat them!), there was no dress or tuxedo, there was no ring, (I'd explained that to Ax and he'd just gotten more confused - 'Why would a male need a ring to remind him that he was married?! How could you forget?!' to which Marco annoyingly replied "Very easily, my friend! Very, very easily!"), and there was no can't-see-the-bride-before-she-walks-down-the- aisle type stuff. There was no aisle for that matter. Jake and Marco had started setting up chairs in the formation of an aisle and Ax had become puzzled as to what they were doing. (Prince Jake! Marco! This is a wedding! Not a game! Honestly, I knew humans were primitive, but...) and so on and so forth. So we put the chairs away. At an Andalite, all witnesses present politely stand.  
  
I learned that it had been a great honor for me and L'Aini to see him even propose; in Andalite custom, you just don't propose in public. They're privacy freaks, I guess. So when Estrid explained that and all the other Andalite marital customs to me, I felt very honored. I almost thought to say thank you to Ax, but it seemed kind of silly. What would I say? 'Hey, Ax! Thanks for letting me see you propose!' That seemed a bit too much of a goobery thing to do, so I said nothing.  
  
I wondered how Ax was handling the One today...  
  
Apparently, Estrid had gotten quite used to the idea of Ax's 'Multiple Personality Disorder', as L'Aini had so eloquently put it. So she ignored all the times the One burst out and called her a fat, furry b#$, threw things at her, and even ignored the time he used Ax's arm to grab the pitcher of ice cold tea from the punch table and pour it all down her back. Ax nearly cried at the latter, poor guy. Estrid just smiled and said it was alright, and that it wasn't his fault. Little Ax laughed and laughed while Ax Sr. hosed his mother down to get the sticky off of her.  
  
We had the wedding at about evening. It was cool. Marco lit the tikki torches he and I had made. Marco had ripped lights out of the ceilings of the hallways of the blade and stuck them on poles and shoved batteries in the poles. It was neat. It looked like a scene out of some elf place; all lit up and stuff.  
  
Estrid and Ax held hands as the Lead marital official held a little console in front of him. He stood in front of them. He read aloud from the console, sounding somewhat bored.  
  
(Do you, Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill promise to adhere to all the sections of the standard marital agreement?)  
  
(Yes.) Ax said simply, as the other weird guy filmed him saying 'yes'.  
  
(Please place your tail blade point here.) He sounded almost asleep. He pointed to a groove on the console. Ax put his tail blade point in the groove. It lit up. I guessed that he was somehow 'signing' the agreement. The official turned to Estrid. She beamed happily as he asked her.  
  
(Do you Estrid-Corrill-Darrath promise to adhere to all the sections of the standard marital agreement?)  
  
Estrid giggled happily. (I do.)  
  
(Wait!) Said the tetchy official. (She will have to say that again!)  
  
(What?!) Estrid said, glaring now. (Why?!)  
  
Jake groaned. "What?"  
  
(I do not know if she was being serious or not.) He said simply, looking suspiciously now at Estrid.  
  
The Lead marital official looked at her. (Did you really mean it, Estrid?)  
  
(YES! Yes I did!)  
  
(Wait! I'll have to ask you the question again. It must be all be done rightly and formally! Now. Do you Estrid-Corrill-Darrath promise to adhere to all the sections of the standard marital agreement, answer seriously and truthfully plea-)  
  
(I do!) She said, huffily. But then she smiled at Ax and said again, softer. (I do. Absolutely yes.)  
  
(Then please place your tail blade point here.) He moved the console's groove to face her. She put her tail blade point in the little groove, just below the little screen.  
  
When she was finished 'signing', the official finished working the little console, and then smiled at Ax and Estrid. (Well! Now then. You're both married. Have a nice life. Goodbye.) He then turned and left. The creepy film guy went with him. And finally, the tetchy guy followed them out of there.  
  
(Well! That was...quick.) I said, in hawk form.  
  
Aximili smiled. (We're not finished yet.)  
  
They had some little custom thing.  
  
Ax put Estrid's tail blade to his own neck and said,  
  
(I, Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill, vow to love, cherish, and protect you, my wife, until death...) His eyes seemed to glaze over a little on this one, and he choked a little in thoughtspeak. (...until death.)  
  
Estrid smiled. She let her tail fall from Ax's neck, and she brought his tail blade to her neck. She also said,  
  
(I, Estrid-Corrill-Darrath, vow to love, cherish, and protect you, my husband, until death.)  
  
Ax's dad, Noorlin, just smiled as the two symbolically touched eachothers tail blades to eachother's necks at the same time, and then touched tail blades, high above their own heads. Forlay, Ax's mom, just smiled...and cried aloud in thoughtspeak. I have to admit, I was feeling a little teary too. We all were, just then. Even Marco. Estrid's parents smiled, and her mother placed her hand on Estrid's cheek gently.  
  
(My dear...) She began...and then she began to cry in thoughtspeak too. While Forlay and Estrid's mom wept together, and their dads talked, the rest of us began to celebrate.  
  
Little Ax picked me up and took me a little ways away from the party. He set me down on the grass, and kneeled down in front of me. He whispered in thoughtspeech.  
  
(Tobias, can I tell you something?)  
  
(Sure. What is it Lil' Ax man?)  
  
He looked hesitant, then said. (I don't like Warrior Aximili. Sometimes he's mean.)  
  
(You know it's his...um...other personality. He likes you.)  
  
He seemed to sigh. (I know...but...but he's...he's kind of boring!)  
  
I would have smiled if I'd been in human morph. (Are you trying to tell me something Aximili?)  
  
He looked down, as if ashamed, then said. (I...I wish you had married my mother instead of Warrior Aximili!)  
  
(What?!) I laughed. (What's all this about?)  
  
(Oh, why couldn't YOU have married my mother?! She's pretty isn't she? Don't you like her? Don't you think she's pretty enough?) He asked, now somewhat accusingly. He stood up on all four legs and his little tail waved and pointed into the air.  
  
(Oh, well, I mean...yeah! Yeah, sure, your mom's pretty and all, it's just that...well...you see, Aximili. You're mother loves Aximili. Big Aximili, I mean. And, well, he loves her too-)  
  
(But Warrior Aximili-)  
  
(You shouldn't call him 'Warrior Aximili'. You don't have to call him that anymore. He's 'Father' or 'Dad' to you now, or whatever it is that you little Andies say...)  
  
(But I don't WANT HIM to be my father! I WANT YOU to be my father!)  
  
I laughed a little, now embarrassed. I would have blushed, if I'd had a real face. Thank goodness I was hawk then!  
  
(Look, Aximili, you need to at least give Ax a chance okay?)  
  
He looked sadly at me. (Why?) Poor little guy. He sounded like he was about to cry.  
  
(Well, he's...he's a nice guy. And he's cool too.)  
  
(Cool?) He looked curious and puzzled now. (What's that?)  
  
(It means...uh...well...it's like 'neat' or 'amazing' or whatever.)  
  
(Oh.) He seemed thoughtful for a while. (But why can't you be my father? You're cool! You're cooler than War- I mean,) He sighed. ( Father.)  
  
I looked away. I felt about to cry. This was too much.  
  
(Th-thanks little man. That's really sweet, but, ) I sighed. (Look, just promise me you'll give Big Ax a chance okay? He's really not that bad, or that boring, once you get to know him. You'll find that he's a lot more interesting than you think.)  
  
The little andalite sighed. (Alright.) He sulked and waddled off, into the crowd of wedding celebraters.  
  
Something really, really wasn't right about that little kid. Poor guy. He seemed way, way too insecure.  
  
That husband of Estrid's must have been a real, real, as-  
  
"HEY! BIRD BOY! IT'S TIME TO PARTAAAAAY!" Marco broke into my thoughts in a very, very annoying way. He actually picked me up and tossed me into the air. I flapped, trying to get away from the Terror of the Universe, but I couldn't get enough wind under my wings and I fell down towards him and he caught me, and laughing, tossed me over to Jake, who maturely, (thank goodness!) put me down on the ground. I decided to go human when I nearly got trampled by Ax's hooves. (The big one, not the little one!). He apologized, distractedly, his mind on his new bride.  
  
Yep. It was definitely going to be a long, and very, very, crazy night. 


	18. Part one of the Party

DISCLAIMER THINGY: I do not own Animorphs! I am not K.A. Applegate Nice Lady!  
  
and now, it's time for another  
  
**Review Corner Thingy**  
  
**Anonymous-cat:** Oh, sorry! It's 'At an Andalite wedding, all witnesses present politely stand.' ! My bad, sorry!

**Optional:** Birdie blinks several times. Looks generally confused. Then just shrugs. Okay Nice Lady!

**The Rest of You:** Erm, thank you! Well. Hope you enjoy the chappie!  
  
Oh and **Wraithlord,** Martha Stewart is a scary lady who markets domestic items for the household and has her own very scary t.v. show. I believe she has just been sentenced to prison for 5 months for lying about a stock thingy, and anybody can correct me in a review if I'm wrong...?  
  
Okay, love story, love story, love story!  
  
**L'Aini's POV**  
  
I was in my new human morph, standing nervously at the party.  
  
It was now early night.  
  
I looked over at Tobias through the flames of the gigantic bonfire Marco kept pouring kerosine into. He was in human morph, leaning against a tree, roasting what I believe is called a "marshmallow." I have no idea what such a puffy white substance has to do with marshes, but, all the same...  
  
Aximili and Estrid were dancing in human morph, faster and more free and insane by the minute. I couldn't help but watch them with awe. Marco was laughing.  
  
Noorlin and Forlay, and Estrid's parents as well were trying the food along with my Hanike.  
  
I looked over at my Hanike. I smiled. He was in human morph, at the large table of human foods, gorging. Jake, (who kept telling me not to call him 'Prince Jake' until I'd finally, hesitantly obliged) and Marco had allowed him to acquire them. He mixed the two morphs, and now had his own look. He was now attempting to eat icecream and cinnamon buns at the same time...  
  
I smiled. From the look of ecstasy on his face, it must have been nice to experience taste!  
  
I would have to try it later. I looked over at Tobias again. He was now munching his marshmallow. He was so funny; that tuft of scraggly blond hair growing out of the top of his head. Humans are so funny looking!  
  
He was kind of adorable.  
  
Santorelli was lying in a hammock, between two trees, the one at his feet was the one Tobias was leaning. Jeanne and Jake lay in their own hammocks nearby.  
  
Menderash was stuffing his face with hot marshmallows, burning his tongue and spitting them out saying "BLEH!" and "BLAAAH!" in a variety of loud voices. He kept picking them up off the ground and eating them.  
  
Marco was now pouring more kerosene into the fire, watching it blaze up and roaring "FIRE! ROOOAAAA!"  
  
Menderash and Jean laughed. Tobias smiled. I wondered, was this human insane?! "Marco! Knock it off! You're gonna light yourself on fire!" Prince Jake called. Though he really looked amused.  
  
"WHAT?" Was Marco's reply. He had not heard. He stood up.  
  
His arm was on fire!  
  
"Marco!" Jeanne called in fright. "Your arm! C'est on fire!"  
  
He looked down at his arm. Stared for about a second. Then he began to scream and run, waving it about.  
  
"AAAAH! IT'S BURNING! HELP MEEE! IT'S BURNING! AAAAAHHH!"  
  
He ran into Menderash, knocking him over into the grass. Both stood.  
  
And now Menderash's fatty pads that humans 'sit' on were on fire!  
  
Both stood, staring for a moment at their burning body parts.  
  
Then they looked up at eachother and began to scream and run about again.  
  
I seized action and ran to the punch bowl. Estrid helped me grab it and pick it up and we ran to Marco. The punch bowl was heavy.  
  
"Help us Aximili!" She called.  
  
The One had taken over and he pointed at Marco and Menderash and laughing crazily.   
  
Without his help, we somehow managed to get to Marco and dump the punch all over his arm and shirt, just as Jeanne dumped a pitcher of ice tea on Menderash's rear, extinguishing the fires. A split second later, Prince Jake tackled Menderash with a towel and began stomping his rear.  
  
"OW!" The human nothlit cried out. "WHAT IN THE GALAXIES ARE YOU DOING?!"  
  
"Sorry!" Prince Jake said, blushing sheepishly. "I was just putting out the...fire...you know...smothering it and all..." He trailed off lamely.  
  
Prince Jake blushed again. "Sorry." He said, while Menderash whimpered and rubbed his singed (and now stomped) rear.  
  
"Aaaah." Marco said, smiling, relieved. "Thank you ladies!"  
  
Estrid giggled. She began to demorph back to Andalite. I looked over at Aximili.  
  
I am sorry Marco. He said softly, sadly, looking rather harried and embarrassed.  
  
"It's okay man. It wasn't you." Marco said, reassuringly, dusting off his arm, particularly the long sleeve of the shirt, which was now almost gone.  
  
I am sorry Menderash. Aximili said looking over at his nothlit friend.  
  
"Hmm?" He said. He had been muttering over the state of his pants now. Oh, it's quite alright Aximili, it's really not your fault...that my rear end is now singed and it's going to take forever to be able to sit down comfortably again because that stupid idiot had to get close to the fire, then had the nerve to run into me! Imagine going running around when you're on fire! Like he's never heard of STOP, DROP, and ROLL before! The little moron! He-" And on he went, back to his mutterings.  
  
"Hey! Where are you going man? The party's just beginning!" Marco called out to him.  
  
"No! It is NOT! It's OVER!" Menderash snapped and stomped toward the Rachel. "I'm going inside where it's nice and safe!" He added on, angrily. "And where insane people don't light themselves on fire and run into you!" And with that, he went up the ramp, and into the Rachel.  
  
"AW COME OOOOON!" Marco yelled. "Tsuh! Man! You SUCK! Honestly! So uptight!"  
  
Okay that was party installment number one. Part 2 of the Party will be coming up soon, and things will be heating up between Tobias and L'Aini! 


	19. Part two of the Party

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Animorphs.  
  
**Review Corner Majigger**  
  
**Estel la Rodeuse:** Birdie stares, quite surprised. Erm...glad you like some of it...  
  
But, uh, I know _you're_ not trying to tell _me_ what to do with my fanfic.  
  
Um, all I can say is, if you don't like it, don't read it.  
  
UNDERSTAND?!  
  
**Anonymous-cat:** Here's part two for you.  
  
Mutters. At least some people appreciate the work I do!  
  
And now,  
  
**A Few Words About My Fanfics That Will Probably Make Some of You Want to Kill Me, But I'm Going to Die Eventually Anyway, So Oh, Well:**  
  
Okay, I believe in finishing my fanfics. So what I'm going to do, is basically just finish them one by one, instead of just hopping around like a nutcase, like I've been doing, starting with this puppy! So I apologize to those of you Winky binky fans. Or Feninu fans. Or So Much for Conventional Love Mertie fans. Or the numerous other ones that I probably won't get to in quite a while. I may work on the Ax and Visser diaries in between chappies, if I get extremely bored with serious romantic stuff after a while.

I PROMISE I WILL FINISH THEM ALL, MY FANS!

Oh, and also, for some reason, this program isn't accepting and saving the little arrow thingies that you use for Andalite or someone in morph thoughtspeak, so sorry if it get's confusing.

Sigh. The things I have to deal with...  
Anyway. Here's the rest of the party! (Though definitely not the rest of the story!)  
  
**Tobias's POV**  
  
The party was a little more sober now. A slower dance came on the computer sound system Marco had rigged up and dragged outside. He had actually managed (with a little of Ax's Andalite computer expertise) to get a decent music feed from Earth. It was an old Jazz tune. The type of stuff people danced to at classy parties in the 1940s and 1950s.  
  
Ax's and Estrid's parents had left, saying they would take care of little Ax and Yani for the night.  
  
Nice of them to do so, really.  
  
(Though I think they just adore Yani- I believe Forlay has been thinking about having a daughter, just one last child. Who knows?)  
  
Ax took Estrid in his arms again. They both morphed human. They both began to move slowly in a circle. I watched as Estrid lay her head on Ax's shoulder.  
  
I was happy that Ax could be free of the One momentarily.  
  
I watched them and thought of their vows. Of how Estrid had gazed at Ax, and how he had just gazed dreamily back, like he couldn't believe she was standing in front there in front of him. A sort of relieved, happy look. When he had said 'until death' during their vows, his eyes seemed to grow pained for a second. Then there was joy in his eyes again.  
  
With shock, I realized what he had probably been thinking at the moment.  
  
_She would die, and he would live on.  
  
And be alone.  
  
We would all die and leave him and he would be alone._  
  
I was snapped out of my thoughts by the sight of Santorelli dancing with Jeanne. She was smiling and laughing at something he was saying.  
  
I was reminded of Rachel again.  
  
Back years ago. To a school dance.  
  
**_We were slowly circling. Me looking nervously at the clock. Rachel's arms around my neck, holding me close. Pleading with me to stay. Eight minutes left in morph! And I ran out of there in a panic._**  
  
Now, standing here all alone, I thought that if I could go back in time, and she had asked me to stay a human, I would have in a second.  
  
**_But I hadn't know then..._**  
  
I felt all of that pain that I had felt when she first died coming, flooding back to me. I was in agony. I opened my eyes and sighed deeply, trying to fight the tears that were threatening to surface again.  
  
I gazed up at the stars. Slowly looked down and to the left.  
  
The doctor stood by the punch bowl, now back on the table and refilled. She was in human form again.  
  
I almost choked on nothing right then.  
  
Her human morph was oddly beautiful. A combination of Jeanne and Jake. They had allowed her to acquire them so she could taste stuff.  
  
Her morph really was gorgeous though... Long brown hair. Full lips. Blue eyes.  
  
Almost like Rachel's. Except hair a mere shade darker...  
  
I felt it still so difficult to breathe.  
  
She pushed her long, straight, glossy hair behind her. She was looking around with her eyes, unused to only having two eyes. I caught her eye.  
  
She smiled a dazzling smile at me.  
  
I suddenly felt kind of weak.  
  
Paranoia Tobias said, "Whoa dude! Watch out!"  
  
Live it up Tobias said, "Shut up, man!"  
  
PT. "Got news for you buddy. She's an ANDALITE!"  
  
LT grinned. "So am I!"  
  
PT rolled his eyes. "She's full blooded. She's the real thing. She probably thinks you're some disgusting 'half-breed'!"  
  
LT "So?! I just want to dance with her! She's a babe!"  
  
PT "What? You barely know her! Besides, she's engaged to Mr. Magnificent, remember?!"  
  
I looked over at Mr. Magnificent (Hanike) gorging at the snacks.  
  
LT "Dude! Just relax, okay! It's just a freaking dance! It's not like I'm going to propose to her, anyway!"  
  
I walked up to her, and before I knew what I was doing said. "Uh...want to dance?"  
  
She looked surprised. "What? W-w-w-whatuh? Tuh?" She played happily with the sounds. Like Ax used to when he was first in human morph, as an Aristh.  
  
"Do you want to dance?" I said, feeling like a stupid idiot now.  
  
"Well...I...don't know. Know. Ou..ohwuh! I don't really know how. Ow. Huh-ow!"  
  
"It's easy. See?" I pointed to Ax and Estrid, still going around in a circle.  
  
"W-well...allllllright!" She smiled and blushed.  
  
I grinned and led her out onto the grass.  
  
I put her arms loosely around my neck, and my arms around her waist. We slowy turned.  
  
She stumbled a little a few times, but Marco didn't smirk, or tried not to anyway. He was over near the sound system, showing little Ax dance moves. Jake was watching and grinning, laughing every now and then. Hanike watched curiously for a moment, then saw Jeanne squeezing extra icing on a cinnabon.  
  
I looked to L'Aini and found her watching my face curiously. I grinned, the kind of grin you do when you find someone watching you and you don't know what to say or do.  
  
She smiled that beautiful smile again and those eyes sparkled up at me in the near dark. I swallowed.  
  
Man, with Jake's DNA in her human morph her face looked unbelievably like Rachel.  
  
I thought how bizzarre this was, slow dancing on an alien planet with an alien woman in human form. I almost laughed. It was like some weird music video.  
  
"What is funny?" She asked softly. Her voice was very gentle. It startled me a little.  
  
"Oh, uh, well, nothing really. Why?"  
  
"Oh, you were smiling."  
  
"Well, yeah. I was just thinking how weird this is."  
  
"Why is it 'weird'?"  
  
"Well, the whole thing really. Dancing with an Andalite on another planet..."  
  
"Oh." She said and laughed. She moved closer to me, peering at my eyes. "Human eyes are so strange..."  
  
I laughed. "Why?"  
  
"You all have many different colors of eyes. And different eye shapes and eye sizes..."  
  
"Andalites have different eye shapes."  
  
"Somewhat. But mostly the same. Definitely not as diverse as humans. And you have many different colors of skin too."  
  
I laughed again. "You almost sound jealous. What's wrong with being blue?"  
  
She laughed. "Nothing I suppose. At least we have different shades."  
  
"Yeah. I mean, it's kind of cool."  
  
"Why do you have different colors?"  
  
"I don't know...we're just born that way I guess...Some of us live in sunnier places, so we end up with darker skin. Some of us live in cold places, so we end up very fair-skinned. That's just the way it is."  
  
"Ah. Climate. I see."  
  
I laughed. Typical Andalite- trying to analyze everything.  
  
Though a great deal of humans were that way too.  
  
"What is funny?"  
  
"You."  
  
She looked surprised. "How am I amusing?"  
  
"You just are. You're beautiful too."  
  
We stopped circling.  
  
I stood there feeling stupid. I hadn't meant to say that...  
  
She stared at me, with wide blue eyes.  
  
I stared back.  
  
I slowly moved forward. She just stood there. She jumped a little as I took her chin on my finger and raised her face up to mine.  
  
I was just about to kiss her when-  
  
"NO WAY MAN!" Marco was shouting at Jake laughing. That startled us, and we moved away from eachother quickly.  
  
Had they seen what I was about to do?  
  
What was wrong with me? Didn't I realize what I could have done? She was engaged! How would Hanike would have reacted had he seen? What would he have done?  
  
But no, they weren't looking at us. My heart stopped racing. I looked over at L'Aini. She wouldn't look me in the eyes.  
  
I tried to play it off, and looked over at Jake and Marco. Marco was pushing Jake and laughing.  
  
"Dude! Where is it man?"  
  
"Where is what?" Jeanne cried excitedly, catching the gleeful mood.  
  
I walked closer. What was going on?  
  
"Jake has a secret stash, man!"  
  
I burst out laughing. "Didn't know you were a stoner, Jake!"  
  
Marco laughed. "Naw, not that kind of stash. Though... man that would be funny!"  
  
"What kind of 'stash'?" Jeanne said, giggling. Santorelli looked suspiciously at Jake. Hanike came over, looking hopeful.  
  
"Cinnabons!"  
  
"No." Jake said, grinning and looking secretive.  
  
"Jake-o's got contraband!" Marco said laughing. "We do not encourage _'illegal products'_ aboard a ship, young man! Unless you...SHARE!"  
  
"You mean, _'alcoholic beverages'?"_ I joked.  
  
"Yep. Sure do!"  
  
"We'll have to watch out for the inspectors!" Jeanne cried and we all laughed. Like they would have any idea what alcohol was...  
  
"What is this 'alcohol' you speak of?" Hanike wondered. "Is it as good as Cinnabons?"  
  
Menderash looked happy. I had a vague idea he knew somewhat what alcohol was...  
  
"Better." Marco said. "Now we can REALLY get this party started!"  
  
"Oh no..." Jake said. "Why, why, why did I ever tell you?"  
  
**L'Aini's POV**  
  
I followed the others down the hall of the Rachel. I wondered again what this substance was that made them so gleeful. Champagne, they had called it. What did it do?  
  
The lights were out down this hall and Jake and Marco were snickering gleefully as they moved the handheld lights all around.  
  
"oooooOOOOOOoooooh!" Marco said, snickering. "I am the ghost of Visser Threeeee!"  
  
"Man, please! Don't even mention that freak!" Prince Jake groaned.  
  
"Whyyyyy?" Marco said. I was mystified by his drawing out vowels. What did that have to do with the supernatural spirit of Visser Three? "Does it scare you Jakey wakey? Is Jakey wakey going to winkle tinkle in his panties?!"  
  
"Oh! So THAT'S your other stash, huh Jake?" Tobias said. _"Ladies' undergarments?"  
_  
All the humans burst into fresh snickering.  
  
"Tobias," Prince Jake said. "I am going to strangle you, stab you, and run over you with this ship." He said this in a startlingly casual tone that made me shiver. But I assumed he must be using what humans called 'sarcasm'.  
  
"Aaah, don't get your panties in a wad, Jake!" Marco said.  
  
They all laughed even harder than before.  
  
Hanike stood beside me. He grinned. "These humans are strange aren't they?" He said.  
  
I smiled. "Strange, but fun!"  
  
He laughed softly. Then looked concerned. "I'd better demorph! I have been in morph nearly two hours!"  
  
"So should I!" I said. Not that I needed to. But...after Tobias's puzzling display of affection towards me, I felt that I should...  
  
Apparently Hanike had not seen it. Not that he would have dared to yell at me, or hit me. I would never have allowed him to. But he most certainly would have confronted me about it.  
  
I noticed Tobias look back at me over his shoulder as Hanike and I stopped to demorph. But he kept going with the others.  
  
Hanike and I stood in the darkened hallway together. Alone. We demorphed quickly.  
  
He drew close to me. I shivered a little I felt his arms wrap around my waist.  
  
Eee!  
  
He chuckled. Sorry. I didn't mean to startle you.  
  
I smiled involuntarily in the dark. He pulled me close. I giggled in thoughtspeak.  
  
Hanike, the others!  
  
They are far ahead my love. He said softly. He nuzzled my neck. I giggled again at his boldness. We weren't even married yet!  
  
He could be so romantic...  
  
Now you stop that! I scolded teasingly.  
  
Mmm, why?  
  
Because, I said so. I said, grinning and pushed him away lightly with my tail. I began to walk forward.  
  
Please, L'Aini, I want to spend time with you. Alone. He said, grabbing a gentle hold of my tail.  
  
I smiled. We'll get to. Don't worry. You have plenty of time on leave, don't you?  
  
Well, yes, but-  
  
Then what are you worrying about my love?  
  
He sighed. Nothing I suppose. I guess I just...I don't know. Sometimes I feel you are too good for me, a dream come true, and then I'll wake up, and you'll be gone.  
  
I smiled even more, feeling a strong tug at all three of my hearts. He would be so perfect. It would all be so perfect with him. Yani would have a father. I would have a loving husband who really appreciated me. As much as Kascherm. Perhaps even more...  
  
I felt guilty thinking of that. It wasn't that Kascherm had ignored me. I guess I always kind of felt that he viewed me as something to fulfill the standard of life that he was supposed to have as a Warrior. A good position in the military. A beautiful, intelligent wife. Two or three wonderful children.  
  
_No._ I told myself. _He loved me. He really did. He 't be tied down._  
  
He had always been one for adventure. For being in the stars.  
  
Now...  
  
I tried to push away the ache in my heart. Hanike and I walked along, side by side.  
  
_We had a good many years together._ I told myself.  
  
_We had a beautiful daughter, and an adorable little son together..._  
  
I felt deep sorrow again, thinking of my little Anukili, as a waddling newborn baby snuggling up to my belly at night.  
  
_No._ I told myself. _Don't, L'Aini. Think positive._  
  
_He gave me Hanike..._  
  
I smiled and looked at my Hanike. Yes. I could rebuild a life with him...  
  
Maybe...maybe even have another little son...  
  
I shook that thought away. No. The grief was too strong to even think of having another child yet.  
  
We reached the others, and I was glad of something to distract me.  
  
They were giggling and holding the handheld lights while Prince Jake and Santorelli worked to break off some cover on a ventilation shaft.  
  
It was opened. They all ooohed! at the sight of racks of glass tubes that looked much like what one would have found in an old Andalite lab researching volatile substances.  
  
Is any of that dangerous? Hanike pondered, voicing my thoughts. He was still holding my hand.  
  
"You could say that." Prince Jake said and grinned.  
  
Jeanne rushed forward and grabbed another glass creation. This was some sort of little dome like structure with a glass stick poking from the top and a flat circle at the top of that stick, on the other end, from the dome. Then she did something that puzzled me. She squealed and turned it over.  
  
"Wine glasses!" She exclaimed. "Oh, it's been so long since I've held one!"  
  
Marco stared at Prince Jake. "You even brought wine glasses." He shook his head, looking sad. "You are scary."  
  
Prince Jake began handing out wine glasses to the humans. He looked to Hanike and I.  
  
"Uh, you guys want some?"  
  
We looked at eachother.  
  
I don't really feel like morphing. Maybe we can drink it through our hooves! I said.  
  
Yes! Perhaps we could! Hanike agreed.  
  
"Okay, uh..." The wine glasses were very small. It didn't look like we would be able to use them very well without breaking them and cutting ourselves.  
  
"Oh I know!" Marco said. He brought some odd thing up.  
  
"Hey! That's my ice bucket!" Prince Jake complained.  
  
"Ah, come on! We don't have any ice! Besides, we can just use liquid nitrogen!"  
  
"Isn't that dangerous?" Tobias asked.  
  
"Nah. Well...maybe...I don't know..."  
  
"We'll find some ice!" Jake said. "In the meantime!" He began to grab some of the 'bottles'. "We'll just take this, outside."  
  
"Nah!" Marco said. "Let's go to the bridge!"  
  
"Where's Ax and Estrid?" Tobias asked.  
  
Marco grinned mischievously. "I believe they have ah, retired, for the night!"  
  
We all laughed. Even Hanike and I understood this time.  
  
Hanike lifted the ice bucket with his tail. Well, I suppose we can try this together my love! He said smiling.  
  
Why not? I said.  
  
**Tobias POV**  
  
In the bridge, we all sat, chilling while Jake poured different kinds of wine and other 'alcoholic beverages' into glasses.  
  
I'm not Mr. Party Guy, but I guess I do like to have fun.  
  
I just hadn't been able to a lot lately...  
  
Yeah, see, when you're trying to rescue your uncle from a soul sucking monster, and going to another side of the universe to do it, while staying up nights having nightmares and crying over the lost love of your life, you don't really have a lot of energy to party.  
  
I watched, laughing, as Hanike sucked up nearly all of the champagne Jake poured into the bucket.  
  
We hadn't known how alcohol would affect an Andalite.  
  
Apparently, very much, very quickly.  
  
He was slurring and laughing his head off in a matter of seconds.  
  
Bird warrior! He yelled, pointing at me and laughing.  
  
He began to run around, jumping on the control panels.  
  
Wheeeee! He exclaimed, very un-Andalite.  
  
"Oh crap! He's damaging the ship even MORE! STOP HIM!" Jake yelled, and he and Marco and Menderash began trying to round Hanike up and calm him.  
  
Oh dear... L'Aini said, then giggled. I stared. She had her hoof in the bucket now and she was looking quite unusually relaxed, and very happy.  
  
I hurried over to her. Man, we really, really didn't need two drunk Andalites.  
  
I grabbed her hoof, and began to move it out of the bucket.  
  
Eeeeh! She cried, then burst into giggling. That tickles!  
  
"Ah hah, yep. Sorry bout that." I said, rolling my eyes, but also trying not to smile.  
  
I steadied her, putting my hands under her arms, on her ribs. She stared at me.  
  
Oh no! You shouldn't put your arms around me! That's very...very... She was swaying fully now. Very very very improper! I'm going to have to punish you for that!  
  
SWOK!  
  
Her tail connected with my head.  
  
I flipped over.  
  
"OW!" I yelled.  
  
Hanike, being dragged to the medi bay, called out.

THAT'S RIGHT MY LOVE! FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT! NEVER LET THEM WIN!  
  
She giggled and waved goodbye to him.  
  
I slowly stood. "That was not very nice."  
  
She looked at the ground like a naughty little kid who's just spat on another kid from the top of the slide. Sorry...  
  
"Uh, that's um...okay..." My head was pounding. Man she was strong.  
  
I quickly demorphed, then remorphed to Andalite this time.  
  
I decided to try the champagne myself.  
  
"Oh man! Tobias! NO!" Marco yelled.  
  
Oh, come on! I won't drink THAT much.  
  
Turns out for Andalites, it doesn't take that much.


	20. The Morning After hangover time

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Animorphs.

We don't have to put a disclaimer on every chapter do we? Somebody please tell me in a review or something!

Okay, sorry if this party scene has been extremely long, but it's sort of vital and important to the general story, and also especially the love/romance bit of it.  
  
Sorry if it's been lame. Hopefully, you've enjoyed it.  
  
And now, worn out ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, the Morning After...  
  
**Tobias POV**  
  
Man, I was dancing...  
  
With L'Aini. And this weird song was playing.  
  
_You take your car to work.  
  
I'll take my board.  
  
And when you're out of fuel.  
  
I'm still afloat._  
  
Everything swirling.  
  
A voice, singing faster now.  
  
_You take your car to work.  
  
I'll take my board.  
  
And when you're out of fuel.  
  
I'm still afloat._  
  
Weezer?  
  
On the Andalite home world?  
  
_No._ I told myself. _The sound system._  
  
_Oh. Yeah. _  
  
_Man, what was this stuff?! Look at the bottle. Man. Can't read it!_  
  
It was going faster. We were in Andalite morph and dancing faster and faster and faster.  
  
The music getting faster and now four voices singing.  
  
_You take your car to work.  
  
I'll take my board.  
  
And when you're out of fuel.  
  
I'm still afloat.  
  
You take your car.  
  
I'll take my board.  
  
You're out of fuel.  
  
I'm still afloat._  
  
_All along the undertow.  
  
Strengthening it's hold.  
  
I never thought it'd come to this.  
  
NOW I CAN NEVER GO HOME._  
  
We fell onto the ground, laughing.  
  
We were out of the ship now...moving to the woods...  
  
running, laughing, and I was chasing her...  
  
so much fun... and now...what?  
  
We were...  
  
dancing slowly in the woods...  
  
Slowly...  
  
_You take your car to work...  
  
I'll take my board...  
  
And when you're out of fuel...  
  
I'm still afloat..._  
  
That song playing and playing and playing...  
  
And I awoke, draped over the sound system.  
  
Who was singing?  
  
Oh, the sound system was still on.  
  
I reached over and turned it off. With an Andalite hand.  
  
Oh crap...how long had I been in MORPH?!  
  
I tried to demorph. Couldn't.  
  
No! I yelled.  
  
I tried to calm down.  
  
I was just blitzed. I told myself. I tried again...  
  
and felt myself sliding back into feathers...  
  
Phew...oh man, that was close...  
  
I was hawk again.  
  
It was night.  
  
I flew. Where was L'Aini?  
  
I couldn't see her anywhere. I went back to the Rachel.  
  
I found her lying in one of the quarters. What was she doing there?  
  
I landed next to her.  
  
Her eyes opened sleepily. She was on her side. Andalites never do that.  
  
She smiled, still drunk.  
  
"Funny bird." She said softly, and stroked my crest. "So funny..." Her eyes closed.  
  
I felt so exhausted, I didn't even have the strength to fly up and perch on the wall above her.  
  
So I just snuggled in her arms.  
  
She held me close to her chest.  
  
"My little bird friend." She murmured softly. Sleepily.  
  
I felt so safe in her arms. She was so strong.  
  
Like...kind of like...Rachel...  
  
The early dawn Andalite suns shined through a small window, and the room was filled with golden light.  
  
I lie in the warmth of her embrace for the rest of the early morning.  
  
The next morning.  
  
Everybody was passed out. Or just exhausted.  
  
Bottles were everywhere. Food was strewn all over the inside of the ship and outside on the lawn. The burned out bonfire. The box chairs scattered around. A pair of Marco's boxers.  
  
Hopefully not the ones he'd been wearing...  
  
I sat with her amongst all of this, silently. We were just staring at the rising suns. I was in human morph again, sitting on the ground with my arms on my knees. She sat next to me, fully andalite. The fresh air chased away my massive migraine.  
  
I breathed in the fresh sweet air and exhaled. I held a half empty bottle of I-don't-even-know-what in one hand. I took another swig of it.  
  
I slowly turned my head to her. She was watching me worriedly with her main eyes now.  
  
"How long have you been in morph?"  
  
"Uh...maybe...thirty minutes so far...I don't know...maybe an hour..."  
  
"Demorph."  
  
"I just did like, uh...thirty...forty five minutes ago!" I insisted, slurring a little. The sun was so beautiful rising.  
  
She was swaying a bit too. She was pretty sober compared to me though she had a hangover.  
  
Her daughter was lying snuggled close to her. The funny little pea had come looking for her mother.  
  
She looked down at the small Andalite girl and began to stroke her ears. "I'm a bad mother." She said, softly.  
  
"What?" I said, a little too loud.

She winced. "I said, I'm a bad mother."  
  
"Why'sat?" I slurred. I took another swig. Damn. This was fun. Getting wasted with the good ol' doc.  
  
"I let my daughter around this." She gestured with her hand in a sweeping motion to all the bottles, food, strewn objects around the lawn. The gesture reminded me of some little fairy looking over a burned forest land. Then her stalk eyes and my eyes both came to rest almost jealously on Jake and Jeanne, lying together on a hammock, snuggled close. Both were still holding bottles.  
  
Marco was lying underneath them, on the grass, a line of drool coming out of his mouth.  
  
"Oh. So?" I began to feel a little sick. Just a little nauseated. Maybe I shouldn't drink anymore...  
  
"I let my daughter be around intoxicating substances. She's very young. I...Oh no...Kascherm is going to be soo angry..."  
  
"Wha?"  
  
"My husband! He's going to be soo soo angry. He's very very protective of me. Well. No. He'll probably just laugh and say 'Well well Ainisha! You said _I _was the easily distracted one!' Then she blinked. She stared, serious suddenly at the ground. Her eyes narrowed as if she didn't quite get something..." Then they widened.  
  
Then they filled with sorrow and looked blank.  
  
"I forgot."  
  
"What? What'd you forget?" I actually began to look around for a purse or a cell phone, wasted as I was.  
  
"I can't believe I forgot." She murmured. The...the alcohol. It must have been that. Oh I feel like such a fool. What did I do?" She wondered aloud, to no one.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I...what did I do last night? Oh, please tell me I didn't act like an absolute fool! She began to blink rapidly, embarrassed. Oh goodness! Please tell me I didn't!"  
  
I grinned. "Yep, babe. You sure did." I scooched closer to her. What was I doing? Live it Up Tobias was in control, it seemed. And Paranoia Tobias was probably mad and just ignoring me right now. I wrapped one arm around her torso.  
  
She looked at me with her main eyes. Those big, green, quizzical eyes. I stared at them.  
  
She was so pretty. So pretty...  
  
No mouth. Can't kiss her. Dammit.  
  
Well...I can just kiss her anyway. Right?  
  
I leaned in. I kissed her like I had last night. Right where her mouth should be. She blinked slowly. Her mind was still foggy from the drinks. She shifted a little, nervously.  
  
Yani began to stir. She slowly sat up and breathed in deeply through her little nose. Her stalk eyes slowly swiveled to me, and widened. When I fully opened my eyes, her main eyes were staring, shocked, up at me. I had one hand now on her mother's face, my fingers spread wide in an Andalite kiss.  
  
L'Aini was now staring at me, shocked. She blushed and looked away. I gently took my hand away from her face. She looked back at me, curious.  
  
I heard the clop of hooves. I turned around.  
  
Hanike stood there. Her fiance. In Andalite form. Looking bright. Sober. Almost refreshed. He looked at me, almost amused. Tobias. He said, cordially acknowledging me, bobbing one of his eyestalks. His main eyes then looked to L'Aini and Yani.  
  
"Dears!" He said, emphatically. "Come on. I'll walk you home!"

I scooched away from L'Aini and tried to pick myself up. I fell over.  
  
Hanike burst into laughter.

"These humans!" He laughed. He began to walk on, still chuckling. He stopped and looked back with his eyestalks. "L'Aini dear? Aren't you coming, love?"  
  
She was looking embarrassed. She had just been kissing the intoxicated human, and her fiance may have just seen.  
  
Suddenly I was pissed. At her. I looked down at the ground and said nothing.  
  
She slowly pulled herself up. Mr Wonderful took her hand. She followed him, gently taking her daughter's hand and leading her up.  
  
"Bye L'Aini." I called softly, still sounding like drunk New York hobo.

Only her eyestalks looked back at me.

"Ah, goodbye, Tobias." She called quietly, looking genuinely confused.  
  
"Bye kiddo." I called to Yani. She actually turned her head around and looked with her main eyes at me. She stared, her eyes narrowed as if trying to read me.  
  
_What had I been doing kissing her mother?!_ She was probably thinking.  
  
I stared after them. Watching them go. When they finally disappeared from sight, I began to think of how she had looked while dancing. Those blue eyes sparkling up at me.  
  
Suddenly I wasn't pissed at her anymore. I was just pissed at myself.  
  
For getting drunk and acting like a jackass. Like my uncle! I felt disgust and revulsion and I flung the bottle as far from me as I could. It smashed on the ground, and the drink soaked into the ground.  
  
I sighed and turned around, deciding to look for the others.  
  
Santorelli was in the Rachel. No telling where Menderash was. Ax and Estrid had probably gone to their scoop off to enjoy their honeymoon.  
  
Suddenly I remembered.  
  
"OH - " I cursed aloud. I began to run, falling down on my knees and feeling even more sick. I puked on the ground.  
  
"Oooh man." I groaned. " I am never getting wasted again..."  
  
Ah, well. No time for self-pity now.  
  
I slowly picked myself up of the ground. My shirt and shorts had barf on them now. Ugh. I quickly tore them off, down to my morphing suit, and demorphed to hawk. Never again. Never again. Never again! I threw them in the dying embers of the bonfire, along with every remaining, empty bottle I found. I found Menderash lying near the food table, under it, as a matter of fact. He had icing and cake all over his face and shirt, and was clutching a bottle to his chest like it was his life line.  
  
"Oh hell no." I said. "Not you too." I grabbed the bottle and bopped him on the head with it. He groaned and sat up quickly, hitting his head on the table and yelling.  
  
"AAH!" He said, and rubbed his head. I hit him with the bottle again. "Ow! Stop it!"  
  
"We have to find Ax. Now."  
  
"WHAAA?" He slurred.  
  
"PRINCE AXIMILEEE?" I said, talking 'Andalite'. YOU KNOW? THE GUY WE RESCUED FROM THE MEAN AND NASTY ONE?  
  
I had remembered Prince Stompy's threat.  
  
If he leaves this ship-!  
  
I groaned. I dragged Menderash over the Andalite home world to Estrid's scoop.  
  
Little Ax was back on the blade ship giving his mother and new father some 'private time'. I hoped the little bugger hadn't gotten into anything...  
  
I would kill Jake if he had...  
  
And what about Estrid? Talk about lousy parenting!  
  
Of course that party had gotten rather out of control...  
  
The fun had just sort of gotten addictive. The last thing I could really remember about last night was Marco and Jake without shirts yelling at eachother while playing some bizarre version of 'Gladiator', by standing on top of two tall metal boxes ( I groaned when I thought of how much they looked like control panels from the Blade!) and trying to knock eachother off of them with sticks, while Jeanne yelled for them to cut it out and Santorelli cheered them on (also blind drunk).  
  
Menderash journeyed for what seemed like many many suns and many many moons, passing many many many staring Andalites.  
  
Yep, two formerly wasted humans crawling across the Andalite landscape. Not too conspicous.  
  
We got to Estrid's little place by the sea.  
  
The scoop was rocking very, very, conspicously.  
  
I stared. Menderash stared. We both stood there staring.  
  
It was silent. But then, Andalites aren't a very talkative bunch normally. Apparently honeymoons don't change that either.  
  
"Ahem!" I said out loud. The rocking stopped.  
  
Menderash glared at me.  
  
"You ARE A VERY RUDE NEPHEW!" He screamed in my ear.  
  
"Shut UP!" I replied.  
  
Ax's head showed up through the opening of the scoop, kind of struggling to keep his head up, almost as if he was being restrained...  
  
"Tobias?!"  
  
"Uh. Yeah. Hi Ax-man." I said and fake smiled. "Hey. Uh. Just came to...visit..."  
  
"Well. Ax looked very annoyed. "Ah, can't you, come by later?"  
  
"Well, I kind of need to talk to you about something important..."  
  
He sighed. "Alright Tobias. Just a minute."  
  
He went back in the scoop.  
  
After a few moments, I was surprised to hear the clink of chains.  
  
Being...unlocked?!  
  
I tried not to smile as I thought of what that might mean...  
  
Then Ax man came out, looking very, very irritated.  
  
"Ah, Tobias. Hello."  
  
"Umm...hi..."  
  
Silence.  
  
_Just tell him you idiot!_ I told myself. _Just get it out of the way!_  
  
"Ah, Tobias, you see, I was...right in the middle of something. He blushed and laughed incredulously at my visiting. You see, when people get married, they normally like to have a special time where they-"  
  
"Ax, I know about honeymoons okay?!"  
  
" I KNOW ABOUT HONEYMOONS!" Menderash bellowed drunkenly. He staggered toward Ax.  
  
Ax wrinkled his nose in disgust and flicked out his tail.  
  
It struck Menderash in the stomach and knocked him over a few feet where he landed on the ground and rolled. He lay there, quite surprised.  
  
I looked back at Ax in shock.  
  
He looked pained.  
  
"The One, he-"  
  
"Is exactly the reason you need to come back to the Blade!" I said, breaking in desperately.

Okay, sorry if that was mega weird, but the point is, when you're blitzed out of you're mind, things will get weird.  
  
Now REVIEW! 


	21. The Inspectors Return!

Well! I know I haven't updated in a long time, and I'm sorry, but I have been massively busy! I didn't even realize I just had this chappie sitting around waiting for the last few lines to be typed! Sorry for the wait!

Thanks to all the reviews and encouragement! This story is nowhere near over and it still has a long, long, loooong, way to go!

I promise to update my other fanfics as well! Hope you guys are enjoying this as much as I am!

Well, let's get on with le story!

**L'Aini's POV**

I finally got back to my scoop that morning, and I fell right on my stomach as soon as I did. So did little Yani.

Hanike looked rather embarrassed to see me that way. For we had never seen eachother on our stomachs before, when alone.

But instead of saying anything, he got down next to me.

I blushed, after all, my daughter was right there. But I looked over with my eyestalks and saw that Yani was asleep.

Thank goodness...

I looked at Hanike and he smiled gently at me. He took my hand.

(My dear L'Ainishikaa.)

Suddenly I hated my name. Why on the home world did my mother give me that name?!

(Call me L'Aini, please.)

(L'Aini. I just wanted to adress you properly. After all, this is the first time we've been properly alone.)

I motioned my eyestalks toward Yani and he chuckled. (But I mean we're the only two conscious together. Where were you last night?)

I stared. His tone was not accusing, but I didn't know what to tell him...

'Oh, why, I slept with Tobias in his bird morph!' That would definitely sound right!

(I mean, I remember going to the medi-bay, and that's all...)

_Well you drank a whole bucket of that champagne_. I thought. _Stands to reason you wouldn't remember anything._

He smiled. (No matter. We had fun, didn't we?)

(Yes.) I said, realizing that whether I wanted to admit it or not...

I had actually had more fun with Tobias than I'd ever had with anyone in a long time.

I thought longingly of Kascherm. Tobias was different from him. More quiet. Certainly less proud, but the sweetness was the same. The longing to be happy.

I certainly felt I could relate to him. We'd both lost the loves of our lives, and I'd lost one of my own little ones.

What had Hanike ever lost?

A job?

I doubted even that...

_Just because you both lost something isn't a reason to leave Hanike and go to Tobias!_ I thought.

With shock, I straightened.

Had I really been comparing Hanike and Tobias to see who was better?! Had I really been thinking of leaving Hanike?!

_No._ I told myself. _No! It's just that...champagne! Nothing more! Tobias is a friend. An acquaintance. Barely that. _

Surely I wasn't mad enough to think in some sad little corner of my mind that we...

_Why not? His father was an Andalite, and he married a human? How would it be so different from that? _

_It just would! Elfangor wasn't ENGAGED was he? I am! _

_So what if you're engaged? Break it off! _

I actually laughed out loud. Hanike stared.

(My love, are you alright?)

(I am fine.) I said, still tittering nervously a little.

_But what does Elfangor have do with me? Elfangor didn't already have a child when he met Loren, did he? _

_No, but he loved Loren. And she was from a different people Like you and Tobias... _

_No! There is no Tobias and I! There is just me! Me and Hanike! _

_But do you really love Hanike? _

_He...of course I do! He is kind to me...he is sweet! Why shouldn't I love him? _

_But do you? _

I sighed.

_Break it off, you're not ready! _

_Yes, I am! _

_No, you're not! _

_Why would I want to break an engagement off with Hanike, just to even see if there was a chance for Tobias and I? _

_You know there is! You know you love him! _

_I do not! That's ridiculous! I barely know him! _

_You barely know Hanike! _

_I...I do know him! I've known him for years! _

_But you've always known him as Kascherm's friend! You've never really known him! And knowing someone for years doesn't always make the love stronger! _

It was right. The voice deep in me. But I kept trying to find an excuse...

_No way. Hanike would be crushed if I left him for a human! _

_You don't have to say that YET. _

_What?! _

_Tell him you're not ready. _

_What? HAH! _

_But you're not ready. You're not ready to move on yet! Even with Hanike! Are you? _

I pondered that for a few seconds as Hanike wrapped his arm around my waist and laid his cheek on my shoulder.

(What are you thinking about my L'Aini?) He said softly.

(No...nothing...) I tried to push the thoughts out of my head.

But the voice insisted.

_Look inside, L'Aini. You're not ready. _

**Tobias POV **

(Oh man! Oh man oh man oh man! We're dead!) I exclaimed, flapping frantically.

I had demorphed and I could see with my laser hawk vision that the 'Inspectors' were here!

Again.

They were looking at the others who were still strewn about.

I saw that stupid young soldier with them poking Marco with his tail and laughing.

Jeanne got up embarrassed as Mr. Stompy came over to her and Jake in the hammock.

It looked like Jake was awake and Mr. Stompy was questioning him!

Dr. Sardis was making his way toward the Rachel!

(GHAA! Not enough time! Not enough time!)

Ax ran behind me.

(Tobias! Face it! We will not make it!)

(OH YES WE WILL!) I yelled hysterically. (YOU ARE NOT ENDING UP IN A NUTHOUSE IF I CAN HELP IT! GOT IT?!)

I tried to think.

_Think Tobias! Think! _

_We've got to sneak in the Rachel..._

_Got it! Okay...now...how do we do that? _

_Graaa! I don't know! _

_Well THINK! _

(AX!) I yelled. (MORPH FLEA! NOW!)

**L'Aini POV **

(Hanike, I need to talk with you about something.)

_Don't tell him about Tobias!_ My mind screamed.

_Are you serious? Of course I won't! _

(Yes dear L'Aini?)

(Ah, well...it's about...the wedding...)

He grinned. (Excited aren't you? I am! I think I'll be so nervous I'll fall over! Aximili and Estrid's wedding only made me think of it more!)

It had done the same to me...

(Yes.) I agreed.

(But, what was your question my love?)

(Ah...er...well...you see...I don't know if... I mean...I don't know...)

His eyes looked so lovingly at me. So trusting. So caring.

He really did love me.

_Was I making a mistake? He loved me! _

_But do you really love him? _That voice cried in me.

_GHAAA! Oh shut up! Why do you have to confuse me? _

_Why do I have to tell him now? _

_Why do I have to spoil this?_ I thought, as I looked down at his arms around my waist, holding me close, his face inches from mine.

(I ah...I don't know...who to invite...) I said, and the huge weight settled back on my tail again.

I felt like I was suffocating!

(Well that's alright!) He said, smiling. (We can invite as many as you want my love! Anyone you want! Do you want to invite Estrid? Is that it? Well, if you've made such good friends with her, why not? I think you should! You need friends.)

I looked at him surprised. (What?)

(Well.) He blushed. (I've just noticed you seldom get out much. You need to be around other females more.) Then he grinned. (Though I like it that you prefer to be around me so much.)

I smiled. (I'm...not very social...)

Which was probably true. Somewhat anyway.

He was right. I did get lonely during the day.

Estrid was nice. Someone to talk to. Someone who understood raising a child alone.

_Well...not anymore... _

I couldn't help but think jealously of her and Aximili.

_Then why spoil this?_ My mind thought. _He loves you. You'll have a lovely Andalite family together. You'll be happy. _

It had always been something that Kascherm had told me, mostly when I'd thought about going into the medical field. (L'Aini, whatever you do, I want you to be happy. Whatever you do.)

Would I be happy being the little Andalite housewife for the rest of my life?

But what would life with Tobias be like?

Where would we go? Would it be that much different than life with Hanike? Wouldn't I still probably be a housewife in the end?

It was too much!

I had certain comfort and safety with Hanike for myself and my daughter, and perhaps happiness, but on the other hand, I couldn't imagine ever being unhappy with Tobias. But would I be safe with him?

There were still Yeerks in the galaxy. Earth was still shattered. Dangerous.

And what about little Yani? I couldn't just think of me!

I looked over at her. My Yani. The only one I really had left in the universe.

But as many sensible arguments as I could think up against even considering a relationship with Tobias, I couldn't forget him. He tugged at my hearts. It was as if there was a chain from him to my hearts, and pulling against it was agony...

Hanike was sleeping now, snuggled next to me. Poor Hanike. I was ignoring him.

Maybe it would be better to let him go...after all, if I didn't care enough to even pay attention to him...maybe he was better off without me...

_No!_ I told myself. _I can't go down this path! I can't! _

I thought of holding Tobias in my arms earlier that morning.

_The kiss he gave me the night before. _

_The dance we had. _

_The drunk kiss we shared this morning. Even if it was weird, it had been so much fun... _

What had Hanike and I ever done that was fun?

I looked at Hanike. I still felt so much affection for him.

_But I didn't love him the way I loved Tobias. _

It wasn't the crazy, nonsense-making, passionate way I loved Tobias.

And with shock, I realized in my hearts that it would never be...

I had known Tobias only days and I was crazier about seeing him than I was Hanike.

I tried to stop the urge to sob in me. I needed to hold myself together. For Yani. For me.

This would be so hard...

Sorry Hanike. But I just can't ignore it.

But wait. What would Kascherm want for me? And for Yani?

_L'Aini, whatever you do, I want you to be happy. Whatever you do... _

I forced back the longing to weep. For one of the first few times since he'd died, I felt his presence with me, warm and sure. I breathed in and exhaled deeply a few times to calm myself.

But my sensible Andalite mind told me that I couldn't just throw myself into this. Better to do as I had thought earlier; to just wait until I was ready...

(Hanike, I-)

(DOCTOR L'Aini!) My thoughtscreen bellowed.

I jumped nearly a foot in the air. Hanike awoke.

(Buh?!)

(You are NOT here on your regular time! Why not?!

I looked with embarrassment at the thoughtscreen.

(Oh no!) I groaned inside my head, privately.

It was Prince Leetherin. At the Rachel!

And I had completely forgotten his threat about Aximili _not_ being there!


	22. Out of Time!

I ran as fast as my hooves would carry my fat little body. Phew. Oh, I needed to get in a good run every now and then. Oh the pain. Oh my sides were killing me.

I wheezed up to the Rachel. Oh, a few more mornings of this and I would die.

I was feeling panicky. Oh no... Leetherin would surely end my career with this. I could hear Galnuit getting the end of it now.

Dr. L'ainishikaa left a mental patient to his own devices! Just let him roam around the Andalite countryside. Who cares if he's married to that female? He could have violated her! A marriage for him shouldn't have even been allowed! What was the Council of Civilian Affairs thinking? So what if he was a great warrior? He's a mental case!

Oh no... I would never work as a doctor again. I'd be pushed back down to cleaning the hospital floors and changing colostomy bags on injured warriors. Ugh...

No. Not back to there. Never back to there. And never back to life as some little helpless housewife.

Then I thought of Hanike, and my guilt slowed me down.

(Aaaagh!) I yelled, clutching at my head, which now ached. I let my arms fall to my sides and gazed longingly off into the distance.

Oh...why did it have to be so difficult? Why couldn't I just spend the rest of my life being the little happy housewife?

Because you'd never be happy...

Tobias

I swooped into the Rachel, commanding Ax to leap off of my body once I hit the floor of the main room and to go back into one of the hallways or rooms and demorph.

(I am going now.) he said, as I hit the floor in the main room.

(Go. Hurry.) I said. (And keep away from the warmth! We don't need you demorphing on someone's body!)

"Hee hee hee." Menderash said, slurring and swaying up the ramp.

"Menderash!" Jake said. "Where's-"

(Hey guys!) I said, brightly interrupting him. (Where's Ax-man?)

Leetherin was there and he stomped up to me, rather intimidating, since I was an already edgy bird with a heart pounding from flight and he was a big stompy Andalite with a bad grumpy attitude at the moment.

(That is precisely what we were wondering, son of Elfangor.)

I nearly groaned aloud again. Son of Elfangor. For crying out loud, my name was Tobias! What was up with these people and their parentage obsession?

It made me sound like some little pansy kid who was trying to live up to his daddy's legacy. Not that my dad's legacy was crap to live up to anyway...

(I don't know.) I said truthfully. (I think he's somewhere in there? Right guys?) I asked, hinting to them. They grinned knowingly and looked more at ease.

"Yeah!"

"Yeah sure man, whatever. Cool."

"Yeah Baron."

"YEAH! hic!" (Menderash!)

Menderash swayed up to Leetherin. "HE'S ON THITH SHIP AN' HE'S BACK THERE!" he yelled, motioning towards the rooms farther back.

(Get away from me, you disgust me!) Leetherin said in pure loathing. He knocked Menderash away from him with his tail, knocking the drunkie to the floor.

Menderash leaped up angrily.

"Soo... want to fight eh?"

(Oh no.) I said softly.

"Queens first!" Menderash yelled.

(Why you-)

Menderash punched Leetherin.

The two launched into a fight that ended up in Jake in tiger morph pulling Menderash off of Leetherin's back where he had been riding and Marco in gorilla morph restraining Leetherin's tail. Finally, Menderash subdued and sleeping drunkenly under a control panel, Leetherin pushed away from Marco and roared.

(THAT'S IT! THAT'S IT! THAT IS ABSOLUTELY IT! I WILL NOT TAKE ANYMORE OF THIS RIDICULOUSNESS! )

L'Aini came forward. (Please! My patient will wake up! He is taking a nap!)

(I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR PATIENT! LOOK AT MY HEAD!) he pointed at a bulging knot on his own head courtesy of Menderash.

Just then, Ax, who had demorphed from flea morph came in.

(What is going on?) he murmured fake sleepily.

(What?) Leetherin's head snapped around from looking at L'Aini to looking at Ax. (How?)

(Come on Leetherin.) Dr. Sardis said, sounding fully disgusted. (There's nothing more to see here. )

He stopped by L'Aini and said something privately to her on the way out.

The stupid young warrior who kept leering at L'Aini and quickly privately examining her rear with an eye occasionally, grabbed Leetherin's arm and pulled him along too. He winked at L'Aini again on the way out. She closed her eyes in disgust and looked away.

He must have said something to her too. She looked agrieved.

With Marco demorphing and Jake already demorphed for a few minutes now, I made my way over to L'Aini.

(Hey babe.) I said softly, morphing to Andalite.

She looked at me, her eyes full of grief and sorrow and pain.

(Save your morphing Warrior Tobias.) she said softly. (I just want to go home...)

And crying, she left.


	23. Contemplation

Okay, this chapter, I admit, is a bit cheesy and perhaps corny, I know, but hold on please! Lots of sap later on in the story chapter due to Tobias' mushy thoughts for L'Aini, k peoples? So if you don't like mushy Animorphs love stories with Mary Sue characters manufactured by, moi, a complete psycho (said very proudly I might add! lol! j/k peoples!) then don't read this chapter!

Really, you shouldn't be reading this story anyway!

L'Aini

At home, my heart began to ache as Hanike coddled me and continued being his loving, sweet self.

(Darling. ) He breathed happily. (I have waited so long for this, for us to be here, together.) He looked lovingly over at Yani with his main eyes. (She is so sweet. I only hope that I can be half of the father that Kascherm was to her.)

I smiled with my main eyes. (Oh don't say things like that! I know you will be a perfect father to her.)

You see, even after all my uncertainties, I had merely decided it was better if I just accepted my fate. After all, it wasn't like it was a bad fate.

Tobias

I couldn't just accept that she was gone from my life, that she would really marry that sap and leave me all alone. I was used to her now, used to seeing her face every day. Used to knowing her presence beside me, like a friend. She was so distant from me like Rachel had once been, and though the pain of Rachel's passing was still fresh and agonizing in my heart, I had realized a newfound love for L'Aini, a love I had thought I couldn't possess for anyone else.

She was just so cute and sweet. Such a good, caring mother. And a loving person generally, even if she wasn't inclined to show it, like Rachel had been.

I'd gotten used to Rachel's pushing me away over the years. She just wasn't the cuddly type. I could understand that, and as much as I wanted her to melt the ice around her heart and finally give in to me, give in to love, I respected the fact that she wasn't, and would never be, like most young girls.

I recognized the darkness in her soul and help me, I even loved her for it. I still do love her. I will always love her and the pain of her passing will never fully leave me. I will never forget her, my one true first love.

But ever since L'Aini came into my life, it had, I don't know, somehow become more real, and more beautiful, and I didn't feel the need to daydream like I had as a kid.

"Please." I stood outside the ship, facing in the direction of her scoop, now in human form, alone on the fields of the Andalite home world, outside the great, dark ship. "Please don't leave me. Not again. Please."

I would go to her. Tomorrow, I decided, perhaps late at night, when her fiance was no longer present there. At least, by Andalite customs, he shoudn't be. Unless...

Unless they had been intimate already.

I shook my head. I didn't want to think of her, my L'Aini, being intimate with someone else, anyone besides being intimate with me.

"You fool." I said aloud to myself, laughing and sneering bitterly. "You've already become so jealous and possessive of her. Possessive of what you don't yet even have. You've already started calling her yours. When she'll never be."

"No." I replied to myself. "She will be mine. I'll go to her, tomorrow night, and tell her of my love for her. She'll have to listen. And she'll definitely have to believe me then. I don't care if I have to tell her on bended knee, or if I have to grovel, or whatever, but she will be mine at last."

I laughed sadly, realizing how bad I was talking to myself now. "Geez, you really are pathetic." I said to myself, talking to myself once again! Man, if anyone had heard me right now, they'd think I was either crazy, or, more likely given my current situation, infested by a Yeerk.

But I was neither. Well, okay, maybe a little crazy. Yeah, just a little bit. But I was really only crazy in love. Yep. Just in love.


	24. The Decision

At the event there were male and female Andalites alike strolling around looking their best. It was your typical upper class gathering – War – Princes and their wives, rising Princes like Hanike schmoozing with said War- Princes, and younger Warriors following those Princes around.

Hanike and I entered the gala passing by some very old Veterans who were swapping war stories. They smiled at me with their eyestalks and I smiled back, nervous.

(Don't worry my dear.) One told me. (You look lovely.)

I laughed, wishing that was really what my nervousness was about.

We entered the dome and I saw some of my old friends from back when I was still at school and a few from University.

I saw my friend Tameera from my days back in school.

(Hello L'Aini!) She looked genuinely happy to see me.

Suddenly I didn't feel so out of place after all.

(Hello Tameera! How have you been?)

(Well, very well! And you?)

(Well.)

I looked at her sideways. I had heard about her husband's death in the war. Othis had been friends with Kascherm.

(I heard of your loss?) Those eyes haunted me. They were very large and grey. Her fur was a very pale orchid, and even then, those eyes stood out.

(Yes.) She forced a smile. (It's hard isn't it?)

I found myself apologizing. (I'm sorry, I should have…I would have been there, at the funeral, only I was…)

(Yes, you were distraught. Don't worry dear, I know. I was the same way.) She chuckled sadly. (I was so out of it as well, I don't think I even noticed who was there at all, so don't feel bad, dear.)She looked distracted. I smiled and placed my hand on her shoulder. (Well, if you ever need me.)

She smiled. (Yes. I will remember you.) Her hand touched my shoulder as well and I wanted to cry. She was so thin and delicate.

She noticed Hanike then. (Oh my. Isn't he handsome?) She smiled at me. (That's him, right?)

(Yes.) I felt a bit proud.

(Well, you must be thrilled! When is the wedding?)

(Ooh, very soon!) I smiled. (He needs to get back on duty soon, so…) I smiled at her. (I'll invite you!)

(Oh!) She laughed. (I'd like that very much!) She looked at him again, curiously.

(Strange, I feel I've known him before. Hanike is his name isn't it?)

(Yes.)

(Oh. Yes.) She smiled, recognizing him now. (I remember! He and I were children in school together! He was behind me in class! He used to pull on my eyestalks to get my attention. He was so mean!) She chuckled. (But I think he was a bit soft on me.)

I laughed. (Isn't that adorable?) She cried, (That I remember that? Oh it's sad, so much has changed since then, so many people have died and…) She smiled, abashed suddenly.

(Oh, but I don't know why I'm telling you this. You don't want to know about all the lucky little females your husband flirted with in school.)

I laughed. (No, it's alright. I love it.)

I smiled. (Maybe you should come over before the wedding and we could swap old stories. My fernla plant is blooming – we could have some of that.)

She blushed. (Oh no! You're busy!)

(No, really, please.) I smiled. (Oh, please?)

She laughed and gave in. (Yes. I would love to. If it's that important to you that I bother you before your wedding, then yes, I will.)

(Thank you.) I smiled. (I'll be expecting you sometime then!) I called out to her, heading towards Hanike.

(Oh I can't just drop in!)

(Yes you can!) I called. (And you will!) I added on, firmly.

(Alright!) She laughed.

Everyone was pregnant and married it seemed except for my friend Druella who had persistently stayed single.

(I hate marriage.) She told me. (I tried being engaged once and that ended…well…He was such a dramatist!) She waved the imaginary he away with a hand. (Such a big baby! And so…pushy!) She stuck her nose in the air. (No. I'm better off alone.) She peered over at Hanike. (Are you sure you're not making the mistake of your life, my dear? Being a widow, I'm told, is actually quite nice. You may not have properly mourned. And he looks a bit unstable to me, you know I can sense that in males and…) She rambled on.

(Thanks.) I said wryly and walked back to Hanike taking my very bored place at his side. He wrapped his arm around me.

(What's wrong?) He asked softly.

I smiled. (Nothing, nothing at all.)

He could tell otherwise. (Please?)

I stumbled verbally. (I…I just…I don't know about…this.) I waved my arm around.

The males he had been conversing with went off, distracted, still talking amongst themselves.

(This?) He looked around, confused. (Then he laughed.)

(Oh, well, yes. I mean, it is terrible how fake they can be isn't it? But don't worry, love. We won't have to stay here much longer if you don't want to. I just need to speak with Captain Enilon and I'll walk you home if you like.)

He looked so sweet and pleading, so kind and earnest that I wanted to throw up – I felt so sickened by myself.

(He loves you.) I thought. (He really does love you.)

Then I heard a thoughtspeak voice whispering. (Hey! L'Aini! HEY!) My eyes snapped around looking.

There, by a potted plant – no behind the potted plant, hiding! Tobias! In Andalite form!

He would be noticed soon! I looked over to see some security warriors looking suspiciously at him already. Oh no!

(Will you STOP BEING SO SUSPICIOUS ALREADY?) Ah the wonder of thoughtspeak – I could privately scream at him. Perfect for couples.

Couples? Is that how I was thinking already?

Maybe –

(Darling, what is it? What's wrong?) Hanike fussed over me.

(N-nothing!) I said, far too loud.

(What should I do?) Tobias said.

(Get up you idiot!) I hissed. (Just walk normally!)

(But they'll see me!)

(EXACTLY! They aren't taking roll of who's here but you look like some kind of psychotic hiding behind a furgla plant!)

(Oh! Is that was this is?) He sniffed at it.

I tried not to laugh with incredulity.

(Get up, Tobias, please.)

He smiled. (I'm just kidding, babe.) He was getting up just as the warriors strolled over to him!

They said something to him. He smiled and nodded –an obvious human trait! – saying something back to them and rose slowly. They all seemed to laugh and they, oh thank the STARS, waved him off and he trotted, smiling over to me.

(Darling, there's Captain Enilon now! I have to go for a minute! Will you please excuse me?)

(Huh? Oh poor thing. I was completely ignoring him again… I was getting good at this… I'm sorry! Oh, yes sure!)

He smiled and touched my cheek. (You are so patient, darling.)He hurried off then.

Tobias came up to me.

(What did I tell you?) I hissed.

(Please, just listen.) He pleaded. I sighed.

(Alright.)

(I know you've probably made your choice by now, but I just wanted to know if I could try anyway.)

(Try what?)

(To change your mind.)

I looked at Hanike with an eyestalk. (Keep talking.) I said, giving in.

(The truth is, I love you. I know you think we could never work, that I could never provide for you and I guess maybe you're right – I'm not practical, I've always been a dreamer and I can't guarantee that you'll be well of with me, that you'll have a dream home waiting for you somewhere, that you'll still fit in with your people when you're with me. Or even that you will always be at peace. But I can guarantee two things.)

(What?) I said, curious to hear what he could give me.

(I will always love you and respect you. And you will never be bored with me.)

Is that all?

He looked sad. (Yes. His answer was firm.)

I thought about it.

(Please?) He said. (I know, I know I'm not a great Warrior -)

(You are.)

(But I'm not an Andalite.)

(You can be.) I motioned to his body.

(But I don't know if I'll be willing to stay one. That's another thing you'd have to understand if we were to be together.)

I could tell the conversation Hanike was having with Captain Enilon was nearing its end.

I didn't want him to find me here with Tobias; I'd have no alibi and no defense.

(I don't think I could ever stay as an Andalite.) Tobias's words forced me to decide.

(Okay.)

He looked stunned, his eyes wide open – a funny thing to see in an Andalite. I tried not to smile.

(What! Really? Are you…are you serious?)

(No.) I said, practicing human sarcasm. I was going to need it.

(Really?) He slumped.

(I'm kidding, stupid.) I smiled at him.

He grinned and threw his arms up in the air. (Hurray!)

I laughed.

(But first, )I said, breaking through his happiness.

(What?) He looked worried now – like a warrior unsure of his victory.

(I need to ask my mother first.) I smiled. Kascherm's mother. It was only right.

He nodded. (Okay.)

Hanike was saying goodbye to Captain Enilon. Poor Hanike. Soon I would have to be saying goodbye to him. For regardless of whether or not my mother gave me permission to marry Tobias, I would not marry Hanike – I didn't love him. And it would hurt him too much somewhere along the line when he realized that. That I could only ever love him as a friend. It would destroy him.

And I'm through with destruction. I thought, letting go of Kascherm.

(I love you.) Tobias said, as he trotted, no, more like leapt from joy away into the starry night.

(I know.) I replied. Oh that sounded stupid. (I mean, I love you too.)

He laughed. (It's okay. You don't even have to say it!) He called back and ran away.

That was true. Kascherm used to say something like that; actions speak louder than words, I guess.

Hanike returned to my side.

(Umm…can we leave?) I asked.

(What? Oh yes, of course!) He smiled and placed his arm around me. I reached and took his hand instead. He looked surprised, but merely smiled.

(What is it my love?)

(Come on…. )I said, preparing myself. (Walk with me.)

We left, passing by the same old group of warriors.

(See darling?) The same old veteran said to me. (That went fine, didn't it?)

I smiled at him. (Yes, I suppose it did.)

Hanike smiled at the warrior, then turned to me, curious.

(What was that about?)

(Oh…he was just saying hello.)

(Do you know him?)

I smiled. (No. He was just an old veteran talking to a young lady. You know, they love to talk to you.)

(Yes, they do don't they. I suppose they are lonely.)

(Yes, they must be.)

We walked. He turned and smiled, and broke my heart. (I'm glad I will never have to be lonely, for I'll have you always.)

This wasn't going to be easy at all was it? I wanted to scream and run away. But I couldn't. I had to go through with this.

Besides, he would thank me for this some day. I hoped. He deserved someone who would truly love him back with all of her body, heart, and soul.

I pondered for a moment about Tameera.

Maybe…

You've got to get him off of you first. My mind said.

Yes, that's true. I replied.

We arrived at my scoop.

(Darling,) I began. No. That's not right. (Hanike.) I started.

He laughed. (Oh no, here we come!)

(What?) I said, defensively. (I was trying to be serious and here he was joking!)

(Whenever you hear your name, you know you're in trouble.)

(Another one of Kascherm's sayings.) I mused.

(Yes.) Hanike sighed. (I miss him sometimes, my friend.)

(Yes.) I said softly. (You must.)

(But you must miss him more surely.)

(Honestly? Not really.)

(Really?) He looked stunned.

(I found it to be true. Oh I still love him if that's what you mean, but miss him? No. I miss Anukili far more.) And the pain of my child's death hit me again full force. I rocked on my feet.

He gently placed his arms around me again. (L'Aini… He seemed speechless. Good. Once I recovered, it might be easier. I'm sorry.)

(You see, Hanike -) I managed finally, looking up at him. I guess I didn't need to say anything more. My eyes said it all.

(You don't love me, do you L'Aini?) He asked, looking down.

(N-no.) I forced. (At least, not the way you want me to.)

He blinked, understanding. He sighed and slumped.

(Well. )He looked up at me, his eyes full of pain. (I suppose there is nothing left to say, is there?)

(No.) I said, looking down.

(I only regret that you felt pressured to…to play this charade so long.) He sounded angry, and I could tell he was holding it in.

(I'm so sorry Hanike -)

(No. )He said firmly. He looked at me, turned to me and took my hands. (Do not be ashamed. You always have every right to change your mind, to say no. If you do not love me, then I suppose it is better. Just please know, darling, that I am always here if ever you need me.)

I sighed. Oh thank goodness he saw things my way. I felt horrible. What had I thought he would do? I guess I'd had visions of him beating me and going crazy filling my head, or maybe even killing poor Tobias. What was wrong with me? I was so silly!

I found myself laughing, probably from relief.

Hanike grew angry.

(Well! I'm glad you find this so funny!) He huffed and began to stomp away.

(Oh Hanike -)

(If ever you feel repentant, and decide to change your mind, I'll be here!) He said, walking away, his nose in the air.

Feel repentant? How dare he! Well, now I didn't feel any remorse at all! Thank you Hanike!

And perhaps Tameera would be better alone! Maybe Druella was right! Maybe being a widow was better! After all he and Tobias had put me through! Feel repentant!

But I couldn't just let him walk away like that. And help me, I'd have felt so awful if I didn't!

(So I did.) I cried out. (Hanike, wait!) He turned around, looking hopeful. Poor fellow.

(Yes.) He said.

(At the gala tonight…there was a Miss Tameera…)

(Tameera, wife, no sorry, widow of Othis- Ferrennial – Tehrath?)

(Yes.)

(What about her?) He seemed very confused.

(She…she seemed…) I blushed, I felt so silly for doing this but maybe…maybe… (She seemed very, very interested in you.) I finally blurted out.

His eyes widened in a look of oh, alright. I had to force myself not to laugh. He probably thought I was out of my mind!

(Well, very well then.) He smiled a little at me. (Thank you, L'Aini. However, I think, that maybe, for a while…)

I felt horrible, his eyes showed so much pain and yearning.

And then his eyes were hard and cold again. (Well, you know. My offer still stands.)

Ugh! The arrogance in his voice! Why he…

And yet, I knew I had hurt him. Perhaps the arrogance was merely covering up pain? And I knew I should be ashamed.

But I watched him leave. And I felt no shame, only sorrow and pity for him.


End file.
